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Being a new widow

(179 Posts)
Mishap Tue 21-Feb-12 09:03:07

I am not able to help from any personal experience, but I just wanted to wish you well and "bon courage." You have a difficult journey now, but take heart that many have followed this route before you and have gradually achieved a new way of living. Maybe the important thing is to let people (new and old friends) into your life and branch out a bit when you feel ready. You need times to grieve and times to forget as well.
There are so many people on this forum who are with you in spirit and behind you every inch of the way.

absentgrana Tue 21-Feb-12 08:59:30

I'm not a widow Gally and have lived on my own on and off in the past, so probably have little to say that would be helpful. I would suggest that you make a point of cooking and eating proper meals and don't simply rely on snacks. I suspect that the next few months will be two steps forward and one step back. Remember that you are allowed to grieve and to rage. Remember too that there are many sympathetic ears on gransnet. All good wishes.

susiecb Tue 21-Feb-12 08:58:34

Gally I am so sorry for your loss please accept my condolences. I am not a widow but have cared for many couples as a nurse and what I have seen is that bereavement it is a slow process which has to be taken at its own pace. Doing what comes naturally for each person seems to be a good way to proceed. Some people don't make any changes for a very long time and others do things more quickly. Some move house some stay put. Try to do what you need and want not what others expect of you or what you think they expect of you. I do hope that this site is useful to you and offers you some friendship and support. Lots of people here to talk with. My very best wishes. xx

Gally Tue 21-Feb-12 08:53:10

Last night was my first night alone, rattling around in our big old house, since Mr.G died. I have never lived on my own before having gone straight from home to marriage. My daughters have all returned to their families, so now it's just me. I know it will be a long, sad journey but I'm sure in time I will get accustomed to it. Do any other widowed Grans have any advice for me? I know I have to keep busy, accept any invitations to do things and generally be open to any offers that are going. I also have to spend a long time sorting out the house which over the past 3 weeks has become a tip (!). I can't face going through Mr.G's posessions yet so they will all stay put until I feel ready. Any suggestions on 'how to cope' would be welcome. sad