Lil's Bar

Lil said she had noticed an increase in the profits,she had also found this curious object on the bar and thought it was the new door mat she had ordered to wipe your feet on the way out.
I realise being sewn into a sequin bodice and being in close proximity to Anton du bec ....or Tony from Beckanham to his mates,is heady stuff,especially as she may have the same routine as anne widdecombe on the wire,and have a natty little harness sewn round her nether regions may have turned ella's head,normally she's a level headed sensible person,I am sure ella will become one of Brucies favourites,this time next year she may be on the panel of judges alongside Craig,Len,and Bruno...give that Alesha bird the heave ho...

Yes - I'd heard his real name is Tony Beke - what a poser!
Perhaps that harness is what did Ella's back in? There have been so many rumours.....

I heard tony had a hissy fit about her fleckles that he left her up there till he had calmed down...he's such a Diva..

Well, she is inordinately proud of her fleckles - perhaps she'd been bragging about them in the Green Room...

With every reason to be proud I am sure Len picked her out from the crowd,as she delicately sips her crime de menthe shandy she sits and reflects her A..MAZ.ING ability to do the splits,something tony is green with envy over,as he always splits his trousers from the effort....he has been heard to mutter about not much ballroom going on in these trousers....

What the Foxtrot....mad as hatters...

I have done many dances in my time, including the Foxtrot, which I thought was ok, but my DW said was wrong - therefore I very seldom foxtrotted again.
The Flamenco is one I have not tried
To say I had, Iwould have lied.
The Waltz and Quickstep I did well
Too quick, I'd have a dizzy spell!
The Waltz, sedate and graceful too
You tread on toes, and out goes you!
The Samba, also my delight,
I'd go like crazy through the night.
Another Rumba? - Yes my dear!
But firstly, let me drink my beer!
Then we learnt a different way
Modern Sequence had us sway.
This we did for many years
Then arthritis in legs appears.
Now we never dance at all;
But still chat with our pals in the Hall!
Now you know a bit more of me
I bet old "thingy" rubs her hands with glee!
She got me once with a snipe,
Now she can put this in her old clay pipe!!

gramps your footwork is pretty nifty
As you sashay around the floor
You have us in fits as you do the splits
The crowd call out for more
Ive seen your passo
Where you shake your asso
Your tango was quite intense
We Have seen you do the polka
And the hokey cokey too
Don't worry about the dodgy hips
And the arthritic hobble
You won't let it get you down
There's only one dance you need to do
Knees up muvver Brown
love you grampsxxxxxx

pete no wonder you feel so much at home then

Message from Ella...she's sorry she hasn't been in the bar much, but the splits and fleckles have taken their toll on her usually lithe and supple body.
Brucie got his tash well clipped after his encounter with her spandex, and Tony (Big Beak) Beke wasn't at all happy when she tripped over the harness and accidentally sat on his face!
Ella is now resting with an IV drip of gin and hopes to be back to normal soon!

(not been at my best for the last few days, love Chrissy xx)

Oh dear, Ella - it's worse than we thought! Still, at least you retained your dignity, which is more than Brucie and Beaky did!
Take it easy and don't overdo the gin drip - we don't want any more accidents....

(Hope you're feeling better, Chrissy xx)

Lil said get better soon ella[ flowers]xxx

Thanks girls xxx

Ella

Nellie you said I could choose anyone as a partner....well its a toss up between Tina (off Corrie) and Lulu, failing that anybody..
My best moves, on the floor, are the slow dances at the end of the night

Yes, it's always advisable to have someone to prop you up, Pete!

Pete thanks for the flowers. xx
As far as I can remember (too tipsy), all of your best moves were made on the floor well either you or gramps and very enjoyable they were too!

Oh you old smoothie pete .....bet you tart yourself up with brut or old spice

Thank you Lil for your rhyme
I trust that you are feeling fine?
A good "knees up" would be the thing,
or even "Brown Girl in the ring".
I've missed Lil's sayings and Nellies too
and that big pot of tea you brew!
The sort that makes spoons bubble and fizz,
Spoons dissolving, oh gee whizz!
Keeps poor old Pete awake at night
in case the gasses should catch alight!!
I am in poetic guise to bring a gleam into your eyes
I am away from this thread now,
So revert to prose to take my bow!

for Lil, xx

Aw shucks gramps xxxx

WELL !!!xx

Very true Ana
Its always been Brut for me Nell...Do you use Charlie

Ella Take it easy..get your feet up (ankles together) and see you soon
More beer for gramps Lil please...he's over in Poets Corner....

Oh, is there a Poets Corner here?
Dear Ella, one I've missed I fear!
If you would set me on the path
for you I'd try to raise a laugh.
Thanks for the beer - I am quite dry,
Another good night has pissed me by!
My bed is nice and warm you see,
Thanks to the company of Mrs. G
A Lady whom I truly love
Thanks to God who is above!
I have some friends, who think "not so"
We have free will, to come or go
An argument I don't intend,
Then fences we won't have to mend!
I MUST go now to pour the tea,
Or Mrs G. won't be pleased with me!!!

pete always used Charlie and always got told how lovely I smelled....many happy memories with me and Charlie.. ....but now I use Angel which is more in keeping with my behaviour .....
gramps xx

Nell