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How judgmental are you?

(429 Posts)
kittylester Mon 13-Aug-12 17:38:27

We have had various threads where people have expressed their views quite forcefully about which newspaper others read blush, people who are supposed benefit-scroungers or have been to public school etc, etc, but how good are you at seeing people and situations from a non-prejudiced point of view?

My feeling is that we all (especially as we get older) have different preconceptions but, if we accept that we have them, we can then learn to ignore them or work round them.

What do you think?

petallus Tue 14-Aug-12 07:53:11

Like it or not 'Daily Mail reader' has become a not particularly flattering way of defining a certain type of person in the way that 'Guardian reader' has.

I hasten to add I don't necessarily go along with these stereotypes though there is probably some truth in both of them.

I read the Guardian for 25 years and then suddenly went off it for being smug and just a bit hypocritical (left wing journalists who write for the paper sending their children to private schools for one thing).

Mamie Tue 14-Aug-12 07:10:17

POGS, in response to my post, you said "I read the Daily Mail, I do not as you suppose all Daily Mail readers do, reproduce it's prejudices in my own life".
This is what I actually wrote.
"If the DM is all they read and they believe every word and reproduce its prejudices in their own lives, then I am sad about that and I think that I probably would not choose to have a close friendship with them."
I was actually very careful in what I said the first time and will say again that I do not assume that everyone who reads the DM shares its views, wholly or partly.
I hope that clarifies things. If people want to judge me because I detest the DM as a newspaper, then I am comfortable with that.

POGS Mon 13-Aug-12 23:34:47

granjura and Butternut, much appreciated. wine

Anagram Mon 13-Aug-12 23:03:43

Of course, that must be it.....grin

nanaej Mon 13-Aug-12 22:35:15

Perhaps that's because you know us Grauniad readers are in the minority and you don't take us seriously!! wink

baNANA Mon 13-Aug-12 22:30:32

I think POGS quite rightly took exception to the phrase "if someone regularly read the DM they would go down in my estimation", I find that comment quite contentious, some of my closest friends regularly take the Guardian, wouldn't be my choice, but they certainly don't go down in my estimation it's a personal choice.

Anagram Mon 13-Aug-12 22:28:55

But you don't hear it on this site, do you, nanaej? wink

nanaej Mon 13-Aug-12 22:20:34

What is the problem? The poster said that they would probably not have much in common with someone who read a paper that was clearly supporting different attitudes to the paper she reads. Fair enough! I often hear Grauniad readers 'dismissed' as 'loony lefties' but I do not get exorcised by it!

baNANA Mon 13-Aug-12 22:13:02

Annobel the sniffy comment that I was particularly referring to was the one that went something along the lines of oh dear, if I find anyone reads the Daily Mail or the Sun I'm not sure that I would have anything in common with them, I am not quoting verbatim here, but something like that definitely sounds toffee nosed to me, not quite the same as snobbish. My computer's playing up can't find out who said it, but would like to ask if they would feel the same about anyone who reads the Mirror, which is kind of on a par with Sun but no doubt redeems itself by having a left wing bias.

Anagram Mon 13-Aug-12 21:52:04

Sorry, my post was in reply to Annobel's - I do find these lapsed posting times confusing!

Anagram Mon 13-Aug-12 21:49:55

Oh, I see, yes - I interpreted 'toffee-nosed' as being snobbish, which isn't quite the same, I agree. People do get very touchy about being judged by what newspaper/s they read, what kinds of literature and tv programmes they like etc. It's undersandable.

granjura Mon 13-Aug-12 21:49:29

Thank you nanaej, you beat me to it and said it much better.

nanaej Mon 13-Aug-12 21:44:49

If a person, as their main diet of news, regularly reads a paper that promotes/supports particular attitudes and arguments it is not surprising that other people assume that the reader has some sympathy with the values that paper supports: left , right or other!

The DM , Telegraph & Times are generally Tory supporting papers and are known to be anti EEC etc and therefor more politcaly right in attitude than the Guardian& Independent which are generally thought to be more Liberal /Left in its values.
It really cannot be denied that newspapers have political /value based allegiences. Even the 'Independent' will be seen as Leftie if your political views are more establishment but those on the far left will see it as reactionary!

I think it is disingenuous of people to feel 'got at' and become defensive if others attach a judgement about them according to their alliegance to a daily paper. I expect people to assume I have more left wing views if they see me regularly buying the Guardian / Morning Star even if I supplement it with online reading of papers with alternative opinions.

Butternut Mon 13-Aug-12 21:44:34

Thanks for your apology POGS, and although there was no need, it was appreciated. flowers

Annobel Mon 13-Aug-12 21:42:27

AnaQuote baNANA: "I have noticed quite a number love to post very sniffy comments about the DM, as if never reading it somehow makes them superior beings."
Have I misinterpreted this?

Anagram Mon 13-Aug-12 21:33:33

Toffee-nosed? Why would anyone be that because they didn't like the DM or Sun? This is getting silly....

granjura Mon 13-Aug-12 21:29:15

POGS- thanks but there is really no need to apologise.

As said, there is just about as much stereotyping and prejudice coming from DM + Sun readers towards Guardian/Independent readers. It really does swing both ways. The whole UK system is polarised between left and right, and bounce from one extreme to another. The First Past the Post system of election is partly responsible. A coalition, as has been proven in the last year, is almost bound to fail. A pity imho. Especially as I am not a leftie nor a rightie- but as the OP says, try to see things from many angles (and end up so often sitting on the fence with my feet dangling).

Annobel Mon 13-Aug-12 21:17:47

I thought I had made it clear that although I dislike the point of view promoted editorially by the DM and columnists such as Peter Hitchens, I respect everyone's right to read it. I read the Guardian, the Observer and the Independent. Mostly I find they reinforce my views, but do not agree with every columnist or editorial opinion. This doesn't make me toffee-nosed. I don't read the Times because I object to putting money in Rupert Murdoch's pockets. And anyway, it's not free on line.

Anagram Mon 13-Aug-12 21:13:07

POGS and baNANA, I'm with you as well - although I do find all this anti-DM stuff amusing! Those who 'detest' or 'dislike' it probably do so because its content doesn't fit in with their view of current affairs and/or the government. To feel so strongly about a newspaper surely implies some measure of prejudice?

POGS Mon 13-Aug-12 21:11:42

Butternut and granjura.

I think because I was so upset I focused on your agreement with Mamie and looking back you only agreed with the first thread which was not the one I take acception to.

Please accept my apology.

baNANA Mon 13-Aug-12 21:01:09

POGS do agree, I have noticed quite a number love to post very sniffy comments about the DM, as if never reading it somehow makes them superior beings, although strangely they do seem to be well aware of it's content. I read a range of papers, mostly on line and have varying opinions about all of them. Of late I have been quite amazed at how left leaning and partisan the Independent has become, so much so, I wonder how it can go on calling itself the Independent as it just seems a contradiction in terms when it is anything but. As with my previous comment in response to Mamie, I personally am influenced by what I experience around me and living in the South East I can say that it does occur to many of us living here that we do not have finite amount of housing stock to accommodate not only the existing population but the recent influx.

Butternut Mon 13-Aug-12 20:59:08

Um, Pogs - Where have I mentioned the Daily Mail? My only comment on this thread has been to agree with a specific post.

I dislike the paper, but I do read it on line sometimes. I find it interesting to have a cross section of dailies. I also read the Independent, Guardian, Telegraph, New Statesman, New York Times, Philadelphia Inquirer and USA Today. They're all pay-wall free.

granjura Mon 13-Aug-12 20:55:26

As said previously, we live on a 'nice middle-class' estate in suburbia when the girls were little. There was a Council Estate across the road. As there was a nice kiddies' playground there, and none on our side, I regularly took them there. The girls met two little ones there regularly, and I ended up chatting with the mum every time we went. One day I said 'you should come for coffee with the children one day, the girls would love that'. She asked me where I lived,, and when I replied, she got up and said 'No way - would never cross the road to go to that posh place'. Never saw her again.

Coming from a very egalitarian society (yes Switzerland, surprising hey!) - I was truly shocked, but more importantly deeply upset. Made the decision to move to a more mixed area there and then.

granjura Mon 13-Aug-12 20:47:55

Not sure why you mentioned me as I never mentioned the DM. I can however assure you that most people who read the DM or the Sun are just as judgemental about those who read the 'poncy' Guardian or Independent smile

POGS Mon 13-Aug-12 20:41:50

Kittylester asked 'how good are you at seeing people and situations from a non-prejudiced point of view'.

I did not see any mention of the Daily Mail so where, when and why has it been singled out yet again.

Mamie, Butternut and granjura,

I read the Daily Mail, I do not as you suppose all Daily Mail readers do, reproduce it's prejudices in my own life. Do you reproduce the prejudices of the newspapers you read?. Would you like anybody to assume you do, or would you expect others to assume you have a brain to make decisions for yourself. Does this mean you have judged me and would not have a friendship with me because of the papers I read - you do not even know me and I find this very sad.

Charlotta.

You too have just 'judged' me. So I am down in your estimation!. You then go on to say you try not to be judgemental.

What do you think I am, some kind of inferior being because I read the Daily Mail. If I wanted to read the Sun, that would be upto me, certainly not anyone else.

I am saddened that I write this to be honest but if I don't then I have allowed myself to be belittled and for what, the paper I read.