AND ANOTHER THING! A place to post a moan about lifes minor irritations!

Mice Yes! I really can't read books in the historic present. And, in spite of the name, I find tellyhistorians difficult as well when they will insist on using it.

people who say " two times " instead of " twice" and other american figures of speech we seem to have adopted !

Loud headphoned people next to me on public transport. Ditto men how won't remove their rucksacks on public transport and shove them in my face.

Books written in the historic present, only discovered after I've bought it.

All of the above AND other shoppers who put three items on the conveyor belt to keep their place and then go to do their shopping while the queue seethes and mutters. A refinement is to send a child or spouse to get the items. People who sit with their feet on the bus/cinema/train seat, especially when they remove them with a long-suffering sigh to let someone sit there. I think I'd better stop there because the steam coming out of my ears is clouding my glasses.

Ah - cyclists! They ride in huge groups here, blocking the entire lane of the road but you just have to be patient.
Mamie - the worst DIY shop happens to be the cheapest, so I have used it a lot - Bricodepot. When I bought my kitchen units there I had to load the cabinets (flat pack) onto one of those big flat trolleys and negotiate the aisles myself. There was never an assistant to give any advice and the girls on the checkout knew nothing.

Aggressive cyclists, particularly those who won't ride in single file making it hard to go round them, I do excuse school kids because they aren't always as aware as they should be, I'm talking about grown adults. Also cyclists who jump red lights.

I wouldn't mind so much Greatnan, if they didn't have to train for five years to become a shop assistant in the first place. What can they be teaching them? It always seems that in a small family-run shop everyone is helpful, but the big places are almost universally dreadful. We reckoned at one time that our DIY shop had been on a cultural exchange to B and Q as they kept leaping out and asking if they could help us. Unfortunately as soon as you said yes and I'd like..., they didn't know what to do next and ran away.

Mamie - how could we guess that you live in France?
My bank had one clerk on the counter and he/she had to answer the phone as well as dealing with customers. It was possible to wait for 15 minutes while they tried to answer some complicated query.
I have got used to the Gallic shrug when you complain, but I have to say that when I ask where some item is, with my Lancashire-accented French, they are usually very kind and escort me to the right place. (And several motorists have driven me round to find my car when I have lost it !)

My favourite was when we returned a pan with a "lifetime guarantee". Shop Assistant: "Well I am not sure I can replace this, how long have you had it?" OH: "Erm, definitely not a lifetime."

worst thing in shops if you return something faulty no apology!! may seem trivial returned hand cream pot bought day before notice was cracked! girl just took it rang her manager no word spoken and said ok get another one!!
where are their manners??

absent Thanks for clearing that one up for me!

Janeainsworth Women d'un certain âge who refer to their socialising as a "girls' night out" do so with tongue firmly in cheek. Sports commentators who refer to the girls' team and the men's team are being patronising. Ladies lunching is pleasantly alliterative.

Careful now, there is a substantial group of ladies having lunch at the art gallery in B'ham on October 6th.

But absent - 'Women's Night Out' doesn't have quite the ring of decadence that 'Girls' Night Out' has, does it?
What are your feelings about Ladies Who Lunch, or is it better not to enquire?

Drivers who because their car is the first one at a red traffic light think this gives them the right to ignore it and drive straight on.

People – usually, but not always men – who refer to women as girls.

People who think the world is one large rubbish bin - yesterday I was in a particularly calm, love the world, mood. I stopped to let a young man pull out into the traffic - not only did I not get an acknowledgment but he proceeded to throw bags and half eaten sausage roll into the road - bang went my good mood!

As a past owner of various dogs over the years, people who don't pick up after their dogs are a real bug-bear with me. From the end of September to the beginning of May we are allowed to walk our dogs on the beach. I used to see people quietly kicking sand over said poo. One of my tactics was to say, in the sweetest voice possible, 'oh dear did you forget you poo bag?' and hand them one of mine. This would shame them into picking up. You could tell the ones who never did as they had no technique and made a real to do of it. Most people here are pretty good. But there is someone in my road who doesn't - I think he walks his dog first and last thing and it always seems to poo outside my house. I've yet to meet this guy but when I do........

Jess where I walk dog poo on path, beside path, in trees and hedges(bagged of course), dogs have been known to break thro our hedge to use the facilities provided by our lawn!
So my vote goes to the owners of such dogs, especially the ones who call their dogs to no avail and when I say they are in my garden assume it's my fault.
My theory is that the main offenders are men who are having affairs. Such men talk for hours on their mobile phones ( can only be speaking to their mistresses) while the poor mutt follows disconsolately.
As the OG would say:
'Don't get her started on dog poo!'

Callers from my phone provider who take ten minutes to tell me how they are going to upgrade my service and call me either by my name or as madam in almost every sentence.

Dog poo on the streets. Shop assistants who answer the phone or talk to someone else while "serving" you. Shop assistants at opening time who spend ten minutes kissing each other and shaking hands before they notice you. Shop assistants who line up to get you out of the door at 12 o'clock so they can go for their lunch. Drivers who don't know they have indicators.

Oh Ana don't get me started on rubbish! The state of our major roads is disgusting. Thoughtless, inconsiderate, infantile, self centred morons who chuck rubbish out of their vehicle windows seemingly in the belief that since they can no longer see it it doesn't exist. Bring back the birch!

Whole nights of rubbish on the TV.

poo bags on trees in the middle of the countryside - would so much prefer to see it au natural, sans bag, by the side of the path.

"ok guys" "are you guys ok there" guys!! Grrhh
Or " can I get a latte to go"
Or telephone callers selling me something from across the world.."hello ma'am"

Grumpy old woman ...not me guys

People who just dump the rubbish out of their car - contents of ashtray, fast food trays and cans etc. onto the road or pavement they happen to be parked on or next to!