Useful guidelines

Very funny!

Love it, Granny23 !

Granny23 I googled your quote and came across that story! while I was trying to get the link put cleverly in invisibly you pipped me to the post!

I shall post it anyway, so there,

"It wisnae me"

Thank you so much for rising to the bait gracesmum and thus allowing me to tell a totally true story.

Once upon a time the Headmaster of one of our local primary schhols remarked, dryly, to the school Secretary that the school's motto should be 'It wisnae me' because that was the phrase heard most often in his study from staff and pupils summonsed before him. He found the nearest Latin equivalent that he could - Omnia negada sunt = 'everything is to be denied' and the Secretary, for an 'in' joke drew up a version of the school badge with this as motto, framed it and hung it outside the Headie's study.

Time passed, the Secretary retired and a new one was appointed. The new Secretary received a phone call from the local Education Department who were checking details prior to placing a bulk order for new stationery, ties and badges. She confirmed the details and when asked if there was a school motto - you know what's coming next - she said 'Oh Yes, it is on the wall outside the HM study and she spelled it down the phone and it was accepted without question.

More time passed. Pupils proudly wore their blazers with the school badge and motto on the pocket, it appeared on all the stationery and on the new sign erected at the school entrance. Then the Headmaster retired. At his retiral dinner, in the speech he delivered to former pupils, parents, staff, education big wigs and the local press he revealed all and finished with Omnia Negad Sunt - It wisnae me!

"It wisnae me"

http://www.tes.co.uk/article.aspx?storycode=2047286

Love your reasoning Elegran

Whoever has the patience (and good memory) to come back in a month when everyone else has moved on and forgotten it.

Omnia neganda sunt? Everything is to be denied?

absent, elegran, which of you is going to have the last word on this thread?

All are denied? Everything is denied?

absent I have just read your posting etiquite I think it is fabulous and have a stitch in my side from laughing,just what the doctor ordered.

Just got back from a storm and lightening filled airport run to pick up a mate, and then to find my computer crashed. Some Sunday morning...................but finding Useful Guidelines Part One (*ga*) and Part Two (*Ele*) restored my humour. Both very, very cheeky!

Greek is even better than Latin for getting a result. Most people can't even read it, let alone decipher what you mean. I intended to quote a little bit here and then put "Quod erat demonstrandum" but I can't get at a Greek font so you will have to imagine it.

OK granny23 put me out of my misery. I know the one about not letting the b*****ds grind you down, but don't recognise "negada" as Latin (which I assume it must be in a sentence with omnia and sunt).

I have waited for years to find a suitable/appropriate place to post this - (drum roll)......

OMNIA NEGADA SUNT

....I'm searching for my babel fish....

and...nils illegitimo carborundum!

I used to think you were safe sticking to threads about knitting, cooking, pets, gardening and hobbies, but on one expat forum a huge row developed in the Horses and Riding section -something about not having horses shoed.
I was pilloried by some dog lovers for saying I did not think dogs should be allowed in restaurant kitchens. I was told their dogs were cleaner than my grandchildren! There is almost no subject that nobody can get upset about. Is that a double negative - well, you know what I mean, you pedants!
Hey ho, my migraine is gone, the dog has had a walk, and I have recorded lots of 'serious' discussion programmes on the TV this morning, so I can get my blood pressure raised by disagreeing with all the pundits.

Elegran that is brilliant

To ensure you have the last word, post in latin. Finis.

Absent and Elegran Will there be a test on this? If so, how many marks is it worth?

Mr soop is shouting...Brilliant! Thank you for making us laugh out loud.

Sharp and funny OP, absent if a bit pointed in its timing.
In the interest of balance, here are some more guidelines:-

To avoid being labelled a wimp, please follow these guidelines closely:

1Join every thread whether or not you know anything at all about the subject under discussion. Your opinion is as valid as the next person and, indeed, as the "man/woman in the street" it is more useful than the tired platitudes of someone who had spent their working life in the field.

2Argue with all previous posts, especially if they show a broad agreement.

3If you spy a post by someone who had the nerve to criticise you last March, be sure to bring their previous bad judgement into the issue.

4Remember you have experience in formal debating, so your knowledge must be superior to that of the poster, as well as your ability to put over your point. Be suitably patronising to anyone fumbling for words.

5Pick on some shaky fringe detail of a post to refute. This will prove that the poster is ignorant or mistaken about the whole subject and their honest opinion is worthless. Ignore the parts which do make sense, then they will believe that these are mistaken too.

6When asked to clarify or explain anything in a post you have made, use more erudite or pretentious language that was in the original post. That will make them feel even more stupid, and you will feel even more superior.

7Quote obscure authorities but avoid giving too much detail on where to check up on the original evidence. Criticise anyone else who does the same.

8State repeatedly that you have never in your life been afraid of anyone and have always called a spade a spade.

9Use technical terms like "syllogism" when replying to people whose education did not cover such formal expressions. That will put them in their place.

10Rush to defend an abrasive post with references to it being "just a joke" and imply that anyone who felt the barb has no sense of humour. Be ironic when the rest of the thread was down-to-earth and sober. Sneer at those too naive to recognise irony.

11Never apologise, never explain.

12Always have the last word, even if it a month since the last post on the subject.

absent...bloody brilliant.

janeain Gracesdad should be so lucky