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Is it me?

(40 Posts)
gracesmum Mon 27-May-13 10:13:02

I am having one of those mornings where I feel everyone is having a better time than me!!First mistake was that I made the mistake of going on facebook - where all the younger generation seem to be out and about with their friends, doing things worth photographing, going places, having FUN - and I can't summon up the energy to do any of it - even if I wanted to! Second mistake was to text DD and hope for a reply - possibly also out and ab out? When did life stop being fun? When did I run out of steam? And am I really just a miserable old git? It is a lovely morning, I am alive and well, my nearest and dearest are also alive and well - so can someone please --administer a kick up the you-know-where--give me a gentle prod not to be so down? sad

Oldgreymare Tue 28-May-13 09:43:33

On the grounds that 2 negatives make a positive, I did two jobs I'd been putting off for ages. Result, at bedtime I felt I'd had a good day!
gracsemum glad you're feeling better.
I know I have late onset S.A.D. because of the (mainly) gloomy weather and that really makes it difficult to 'get up and go'.
Lets have some more sunshine

NannaAnna Mon 27-May-13 22:41:40

gracesmum I've had a weekend of feeling the same as you. As someone else has mentioned, Facebook is not a good place to go when you're feeling as if you're missing out on the fun that everyone else seems to be having!
Like you, I'm happy to 'get up and go' if someone else has suggested/organised somewhere to 'get up and go' to, but left to my own devises, the days quite often just seem to 'be' - which I'm perfectly happy with most of the time. It's things like Bank Hols that bring out the feeling of having to do something. Anyway, the weekend is done now, and we don't have another one to confront until August. I'm feeling perfectly positive and chirpy this evening, knowing that if I really want to do something I'll do it sunshine

janeainsworth Mon 27-May-13 22:23:05

Glad you feel better Gracesmum. I would invite you round to ours for wine if only you lived nearer grin

gracesmum Mon 27-May-13 20:18:03

DH was made redundant - not DD!!!

gracesmum Mon 27-May-13 20:17:00

{{hug}} Nellie - my DH is a very late starter in the day and we often get to lunchtime and he is barely out of his PJs! This is part of why I often feel slightly paralysed as I am deep down quite a lazy person too, but willing to "get up and go" when others are more energetic, e.g. when with DD, SIL and the little boys. I find it hard to have the motivation for both of us, but when I do, we both enjoy whatever we have gone to (for instance Wrest Park on Saturday ) but if I hadn't insisted, DH would have sat and read most of the day. I think Jane has a point - since we moved here (OK 28 years ago!! we have been less social: partly because of DH's health, partly because I was teaching and knackered at the weekend, partly because when the DDs were teenagers I always seemed to be the one to turn out on chauffeur duty on a Saturday night, partly because when DD was made redundant before his illness started he was a bit of a misery, it was also expensive, and partly because I felt "new" for a very long time (It's one of those villages) So yes, it is up to me to invite people round although now that everybody has retired, they are so often away for holidays, in their caravans, or visiting their own grown up children. We do meet up with friends for pub lunches quite a lot which is nice so we are not total hermits, but I admit I have got out of the habit of having people other than the extended family round for meals. memo to self, make more effort.
Actually I had to go out for some cream to make a quiche and found what the rest of the world was doing - SHOPPING! sad - as if there aren't better ways to spend a sunny Bank holiday afternoon.
The day got better, thank you - it was just one of those mornings!!

Ariadne Mon 27-May-13 19:44:23

nellie ((hug))

Aka Mon 27-May-13 19:05:47

I note your OP was at 10.13 this morning 'gracesmum'. I've only just signed in now and haven't had a chance to look for you on other threads, but wondered what you actually did with your day after all? Did it improve at all?

Nelliemoser Mon 27-May-13 18:45:11

I am feeling like just like Gracesmum today.
I did a bit of gardening and it came on to rain nothing else planned.
Trying to get out with DH is often more stressful than not going anywhere.
He spends hours faffing around not getting ready. I can't drag a grown man out of bed. I am increasingly setting a time deadline and just going then whatever.

Then finds something else that needs doing last minute. If as usual I am driving I then get a running commentary on the way.

If we go to a stately home or such he tends to wander off in his own little world with little regard for anyone else.

I honestly end up generally less stressed going out alone.
Not a satisfactory situation I know. sad
Can't even cheer myself up with food today its my low cal day.

Off to choir despite the bankholiday.

JessM Mon 27-May-13 18:00:37

Having been self employed for years, bank holidays long ago lost their charm. Indeed I succumbed to old-gittish moaning about the fact that the PM granted an extra one in both 2011 and 2012.
You are not an old git. You are a stylish woman with a great sense of humour.

glammanana Mon 27-May-13 17:10:33

gracesmum we never do anything on Bank Holidays after yrs of always working the Bank Holidays showing totally uninterested people who where only out for a drive around New Showhomes I relish the quiet time now,I don't envy all the drivers who must go out because it is an expected thing too do and spend all day in traffic jams.
So go and find a nice bar of chocolate and snuggle up and start again to-morrow.flowers

storynanny Mon 27-May-13 17:00:36

Shysal, I'm going out to buy one the minute oh is off on the night shift and I'm going to eat it all myself too!
I never ever go out of my local area on a bank holiday. I'm lucky in that I can cycle to beach in 5 mins. When I was teaching full time never went anywhere on bank hol either, saved it for later in the week.
Glad I did go out though as rain is forecast for tomorrow and some people will be back at work. Not me thank goodness, I have a twitchy bit of supply next week to keep me in secret chocolate supplies! Haha just coined a new phrase , supply teaching for supply of chocolate.

Oldgreymare Mon 27-May-13 16:13:27

Tegan loved the idea that a ferret can bring so much happiness, so much so that I'm thinking of starting something!
gracesmum reading the above has put a smile on my face, hope it has done the same for you smile

numberplease Mon 27-May-13 16:08:56

We NEVER go out on a Bank holiday, hardly ever go out anyway, so the other day, hubby says "Do you want to go somewhere over the bank holiday weekend, a nice day out somewhere?", this when I`m creased up with flipping sciatica and can`t even contemplate walking about anywhere!
Anyway, I hope you`re all having a great do as you please bank holiday weekend.

Ariadne Mon 27-May-13 16:01:57

Well, it is now pouring with rain here so I am going nowhere! Like most of you, we enjoy not going out at weekends (parties etc are different) since we can do what we need to do during the week. And vegas is right, there is always such a lot of hype about public holidays.

gracesmum you most definitely are not a miserable old git! Gottit? Good. flowers

shysal Mon 27-May-13 15:40:17

storynanny, have you tried the new Cadbury's Marvellous Creations chocolate bars? On the last Bank holiday I ate a large bar of the jelly popping candy version in one sitting! And very nice it was too. I always stay in alone at these times and thank my lucky stars that I am not in a crowd or traffic jam somewhere. I have been spending time pottering in the garden and sitting reading in the sun today. It is all too easy to feel depressed when alone at these times, but it is good to know that there are many people in the same boat.

annodomini Mon 27-May-13 15:35:55

I mistakenly thought that next weekend was the bank holiday so arranged to go south then to visit my DS2's family - after the NW get together, of course. Today I went to the garden centre to get some eggs - no I haven't gone off my rocker, the deli there sells the cheapest free range eggs in the area. The car park was chock-a-block and the checkouts had huge queues so I put off any decision about plants until sanity returns. A great many of the customers were retired people who, like me, can go any day!

storynanny Mon 27-May-13 14:49:16

Oh graces mum, I know how you feel!!! Just been to the beach for a cup of tea on my own as partner asleep, on nights, one son living in USA, 2 in London, parents 5 hours drive away, all my friends with their family or at work ...... And struggling with the "big talk" see my current post on money thread.
But, it's ok to have off days, I'm going to buy a big bar of chocolate and eat it all myself tonight in front of the telly.

KatyK Mon 27-May-13 13:17:17

gracesmum I wouldn't take much notice of Facebook. Most folks only use it to say the good stuff about their lives. In our house we call it Facebrag. I'm not so sure everyone is having as much fun as they say they are. We have deleted our Facebook accounts as it was having a really bad effect on me. I'm not sure why you would have to tell the world that your life is fun if it really was (if that makes sense). There is an old saying 'believe half of what you see and nothing of what you hear'. Now I think that makes me a miserable (and cynical) old git ! Try to enjoy your day.

Galen Mon 27-May-13 12:59:51

gracesmum you are not an old git!
My neighbour is definitely one and you are nothing like him!

Ella46 Mon 27-May-13 12:39:05

@janeainsworth I've always wanted to be elegant grin

annsixty Mon 27-May-13 12:33:14

No gracesmum it isn't just you, your thoughts mirrored exactly my own. So mindful of advice on here I popped along to MandS simply food and bought "Dine in for £10" which of course includes a nice pud and I feel better already.

NannaB Mon 27-May-13 12:21:31

Being retired, I find that Bank Holidays do not mean anything. I am glad that the sun is shining for those who would normally be at work so they can enjoy their day off.

GillieB Mon 27-May-13 12:14:05

We are not really doing anything for the Bank Holiday, either. When we both retired we decided that we no longer needed to go out much at Bank Holidays, or, to be honest, weekends. At those times we avoid going anywhere where there are crowds - it's just not worth it, and we can go in the week when places are quieter and we will enjoy them more.

janeainsworth Mon 27-May-13 12:04:08

Gracesmum I'm not sure whether your concern is that you aren't having fun, and would like to, or whether you're worried because you don't want to have fun any more.
If it's the former, can I remind you of the Agony Aunt's advice to the girl who complained she never went to any parties - 'Do you ever give any?' grin
If the latter, can I reassure you that it's perfectly ok at our stage of life, to do exactly as we wish. I generally find that days when I give in to what my mum used to refer to as 'disinclinitis', and spend the time slobbing out, as Ella so elegantly terms it,grin are followed by a renewed spurt of energy the next day sunshine

annodomini Mon 27-May-13 11:48:00

Yesterday, when I got in the car to go to the cinema, I turned on the ignition - nothing happened. I remembered that I had found the door not quite closed and realised that the interior light must have drained the battery. Friends came and picked me up so it wasn't until this morning that I called in the AA. Upshot is that I needed a new battery. Well, the old one had lasted as long as the car - 13 years - so I can't complain but my bank account isn't too healthy. hmm