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Are you like your friends

(11 Posts)
PRINTMISS Fri 26-Jul-13 17:04:21

I am talking about close friends. I have two one I have known for over 60 years, we met at work, used to travel there by bike, and both lived in the same direction, so chatted a lot, and we seemed just to click. Our husbands get on really well also. The other friend is more recent 10 or so years, and again both the men are good friends. In both cases, though I am different from these two friends as chalk is from cheese - they are very much alike. I love bold colours, they are in to gentle pinks and blues, I am quite untidy, they are not, they both paint water-colours, and I know if I painted it would be oils and brash. their gardens are beautifully tended, mine is a controlled wilderness. We all agree on three things, discipline for the children, (all grown up) good manners and respect for other people's property.

HUNTERF Fri 26-Jul-13 19:47:54

PRINTMISS

Except for my family I can not say I have any regular contact with people I have known for more than about 10 years.
I worked in London but I was the only one who commuted in on my rail line, when we retired we all went to different areas of the country.
I was the only one who went to Birmingham.
I worked in Birmingham for about 5 years after my first retirement and was retired off again.
Again the people in that office retired to different parts of the country.
I do have the occasional reunion with people I worked with in London and some from my university days.
Oddly enough I have met up again with people in Birmingham who worked in the same building as me in London but not in the same office.
When I worked in London I did not even know they had any connection with Birmingham.
I find this strange as I was told when I retired in London nobody would go to Birmingham to retire.

Frank

specki4eyes Fri 26-Jul-13 22:26:19

I married very young and lost touch with most of my childhood friends, except for one or two.
My most meaningful friends are the ones I met during my 20s and 30s and 40 years later, we are still moving around in a pack. Not that we live in each others pockets, its just that old cliché "we are there for each other" all the time. They are the ones who know me warts and all and we share our trials and tribulations without fear. When we get together, old conversations resume; old jokes and ribbings resurface; deepest secrets are revealed..its wonderful. We're lucky to have one person who acts as social secretary, making sure we make time to get together.
Then there's an eclectic group of pals who I have met as neighbours or through shared hobbies and interests - they're great, but there's always a little reserve - I wouldn't confide in them too deeply.
And last but not least, there are GNetters who, I like to believe, share a unique understanding and empathy which is of great value to all who connect.
Power to all our friends! grin flowers

grannyactivist Sat 27-Jul-13 00:01:06

No, in many ways I'm not really like my friends at all. My friends are a diverse lot from all walks of life, all ages etc. Many (most actually) of them are artistic and musical (I'm neither), some share my faith whilst others do not, many are from different cultures and have a different outlook on life. We value what we have in common, but are aware of areas of difference and somehow manage not to let our differences affect our relationship in unhealthy ways. Sometimes I'm uncomfortable with views held by friends, but we can agree to disagree about things.

ninathenana Sat 27-Jul-13 10:12:10

No I don't think I am really. My friend of 40 yrs has very different taste from me when it comes to her home. My furniture and decor are contemporary hers is brown furniture traditional. She also dresses very different to me. She is quietly spoken, I'm the loud mad one grin.

My other close friend is 8 yrs younger than me. She is even louder than me and swears in public ! Which I find embarrassing. But she is very loyal, and I know I could call her in the middle of the night.

Neither of them live near now so I don't see either very often but we are in constant touch.

Movedalot Sat 27-Jul-13 11:09:16

Most definitely not! I am unique! My oldest friend from schooldays who was my matron of honour are good friends even though we have little in common but somehow it just seems to work. Over the years we have moved away and been busy with our own lives but still kept in touch.

Having moved around a lot I still have close friends in some of the places where we have lived and I know we will always be close. I also have a much younger friend who I only met about 7 years ago but I know we would do anything for each other, we shared so much at the time and it made us close.

In the last few weeks I have met a new neighbour and feel pretty sure she and I will become friends, who know but we did gel immediately.

People come and go in our lives but some are always there for us, as we are for them, despite us having such different lives and likes. Vive la difference. smile

FlicketyB Sat 27-Jul-13 17:02:53

Some years ago my best friend, we met at boarding school over 50 years ago, put her finger on what it is that drew us together and still keeps us close. She is a senior lawyer and she went on some course and at the end of it one of the tutors turned to her said, 'you know, lawyer or not, you are deeply subversive.' When she told me about this she turned to me and said, 'You and me both' - and she was right and we have both been tipping up apple carts ever since.

whenim64 Sat 27-Jul-13 17:18:22

Ha ha! Flckety grin My best friend (since we were two), sent me a birthday card this year that said on the front 'You will aways be my friend' and on the inside 'I have too much dirt on you!' grin

PRINTMISS Sun 28-Jul-13 08:28:15

I think that is what 'best' friends are about when, we talk to them, and they to us, about all sorts of things we would not dream of discussing with anyone else, and of course there are those really stupid things you have done together and would rather no one else knew.

whenim64 Sun 28-Jul-13 09:07:06

Yes, PRINTMISS you're right. We've shared so much and both of us have complete trust in each other to be able to say anything, knowing it will go no further. smile

celebgran Sun 28-Jul-13 09:54:53

Strange that my oldest friend who I met aged 16 when we started work is similar in some ways but poles apart in others she decided not to have children but is godmother to 11 including our estranged daughter. I know she will always be there to support me but sadly she and I have differed over the estrangement . Our s I law rang and cut them out too.

If we together a lot I think we pick up on mannerisms from friends.

My other best friend really is lovely we have such fun and go out as foursome also joining 2 social clubs together I can totally relax with her and we laugh a lot!
I realise as time gets by different people mean different things to us but is place for them all unless they drag you down.