Friends with attitude

Did you tell her? Did you point out (oh so gently) that she was treating you as second-best in cancelling your date because something better had come along?

Because if you did not, she will think that it was OK. When girls are young, and still on the lookout for gorgeous talent, it is accepted that if they are asked out by a hunk, their female friends wish them well and don't mind being dumped, but in a grown woman it is just rude. If she does not realise that and stop, she will find that she is not invited anywhere, because she can't be relied upon to appear. She needs to grow up.

Turkishdelights

I have an ex-friend with these traits.

We used to take turns meeting up at her house or ours. But when we were due to go to hers she cancelled and made another date. The other date came up and then she again cancelled. The final straw came just before the allotted date she rang to say can she put us off yet again because her cousin was coming. Well I was furious, I would never put off the original appointment for someone else, how rude! I haven't bothered with her since.

Prior to this, I and others were sitting around one persons house waiting for her to arrive so we could all go out for a meal. A phone call comes telling us she had been invited out by someone else so wouldn't be coming, again how rude!!

One of my closest friends whom I've known for 20+ yrs is constantly telling me about her, her OH and her daughter's ailments and their various hospital appointments etc. I do sympathise but there's only so many times you can say "Oh dear"

Know what you mean. I have a friend who is great company, terrific sense of humour, always has me feeling giggly and relaxed whenever we chat or get together.
But her very annoying trait is to say she is not sure if we can meet up next week because of this or that, making excuses, and wanting to leave it to the last minute, and then either say yes ok we will meet or no sorry I have to do this or that or she does not feel well. If she fancies spending the day on her own or doing something else she says "oh dear, Ive come down with the flu again" or whatever.

My closest friend is a bustler, and drives me mad! Wouldn't change her for the world, dread the time when she will not longer be here to bustle me. I think I probably drive her mad with my laid back attitude, that is what friendship is all about, isn't it?

My best friend from school knows everything, she knows even more about subjects I have studied at university or spent a career working on than I do. She is a doctor who reached a very senior position and is used to being the great 'I am' and still assumes it.

We remain close because our friendship was forged at a boarding school we both thoroughly loathed and where we were both 'odd ones out'. We are both deeply subversive, a description of us made by others - and when I have been struck down - by the death of my sister, DD's accident that could have left her with a serious disability - she was there with comfort and practical advice and help and I hope I have been there for her when needed.

After 60 years it will take a lot to break our friendship despite at times wanting to throw something at her.