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Who cares about becoming invisible?

(108 Posts)
mollie Sat 01-Feb-14 21:56:22

I've been thinking about the recent thread bemoaning the apparent invisibility of women over forty. Invisible to whom? And why does it matter? Anyway, I've decided to collect examples of people (men and women) who should be our role models ... here are just two that were featured in the news today:

www.independent.co.uk/life-style/fashion/news/american-apparel-reveals-62yearold-jacky-oshaughnessy-as-underwear-model-9099206.html

www.independent.co.uk/sport/general/others/cycling-102yearold-frenchman-robert-marchand-beats-own-world-record-9101226.html

NfkDumpling Sat 01-Feb-14 22:33:28

As someone who went from spots to wrinkles and cellulite and missed completely the svelte dishy bit in between I'm not sure whether to be depressed that there's no way I'll ever look like the model or pleased for her. And as for that French bloke on the bike ........ sad

Ana Sat 01-Feb-14 22:53:56

I'm fed up with being presented with 'role models' - no offence, mollie.
At my age, I don't really think I need any.

mollie Sat 01-Feb-14 22:57:36

Maybe you don't Ana but I do... in my world life ends before 70 which makes me feel almost ancient so stories like this remind me of an alternative option...

glassortwo Sat 01-Feb-14 22:58:25

I am what I am dont need a role model, its taken me 58 years to accept who and what I am... no role model needed I managed it all by myself warts and all.

Galen Sat 01-Feb-14 22:59:37

If you're on a mobility scooter or crutches, you become totally invisible, even if you're 5'7" and 14 stone!

mollie Sat 01-Feb-14 23:07:38

OK, maybe none of you need role models but can't we just admire these two people for their individuality and their respective successes? Or is that impossible too?

merlotgran Sat 01-Feb-14 23:12:17

I'm happy for them and I suppose the 102yr old bloke makes me feel, Good on yer, but I don't think I admire them.

I don't mind being invisible. I can always shout BOO if I want to make someone jump.

Soutra Sat 01-Feb-14 23:17:20

I can admire people and may secretly wish to be Judi Dench in my next life grin but realise that I am me and what I make of myself is down to me! I don't need role models or external inspiration and I willl do my da**dest to remain very visible!

newist Sat 01-Feb-14 23:19:32

I have never understood so called role models, why would anyone want to aspire to be like someone else. surely we should be ourselves and proud of it

Aka Sat 01-Feb-14 23:21:08

I did read about the increase in pedestrian being hit by mobility scooters Galen grin

Aka Sat 01-Feb-14 23:23:36

Don't knock poor Mollie for her post. Even if I don't want a role model myself I'm well impressed by the 102 year old speed cyclist and the thought behind a lingerie company using an older model.

mollie Sat 01-Feb-14 23:27:52

I don't actually want to be either person but I did admire their determination to carve their own paths. It's much more satisfying than the whinging and complaining and excuse-making that seems to be so prevalent these days...

mollie Sat 01-Feb-14 23:31:35

Thanks AKA but it's much as I expected really, I'm getting used to it ...

merlotgran Sat 01-Feb-14 23:31:48

Galen. Last year a woman on a mobility scooter created a stir in our local market place when she pushed her way through a crowd which parted like the Red Sea and found herself in the middle of a group of Morris dancers. Everyone cheered and she waved before driving off. grin

#onewaytogetnoticed

penguinpaperback Sun 02-Feb-14 00:05:34

I've always thought of Isabella Rossellini as being a beautiful, chic, intelligent woman.

LizG Sun 02-Feb-14 00:06:35

grin Galen. i am 5'10" **stone (!!) yet I am invisible.

As with all of you I was taught to respect my elders but now I have reached pension age what has happened? Youngsters (40 and under smile ) tut at me for getting in their way and not manoevring quickly, sigh when my arthritic fingers cause me to fumble with my purse and roll their eyes when I say 'I beg your pardon'.

Sometimes I wonder what is the point of me. Please world I am here and I do exist.

Soutra Sun 02-Feb-14 00:10:30

I didn't think anybody was knocking anybody just giving our opinions confused

Soutra Sun 02-Feb-14 00:16:09

LizG I am sorry this is your experience. Never feel you have to apologise and if you can inject a bit of Maggie Smith aka Dowager Countess of Grantham, into your "I beg your pardon " so much the better grin

LizG Sun 02-Feb-14 00:18:39

grin Soutra

Aka Sun 02-Feb-14 00:20:30

Liz I've stopped apologising for fumble fingers. I now exact revenge by trying to count out the exact money to see if I've got it, and if I have I invariably drop coins and have to retrieve them. Or if after emptying my purse at the checkout I find I haven't enough in cash then it all has to be retrieved, put back in my purse and I have to find my debit card.

If they want dithery old lady I give it to them in spades.

If anyone in the queue gets mouthy I explain that the checkout girl or boy (older people are much more patient) has flustered me.

NannaAnna Sun 02-Feb-14 00:21:38

I've never understood what being 'invisible' means. Can someone enlighten me please?

Aka Sun 02-Feb-14 00:24:04

Soutra please allow me to wear my knickers on the outside of my PJs.

absent Sun 02-Feb-14 07:27:43

I am not sure whether I am invisible but I am damn sure I'm not inaudible. grin

LizG Sun 02-Feb-14 07:41:09

That's a difficult question Nanna because it means different things to different people but as a starter - it means remaining unserved at a counter whilst the staff chat, being queue jumped in the post office, people barging past because they have somewhere important to go, having 'you wouldn't understand' opinions therefore The recipient isn't listening, being asked if you want to visit the loo by well meaning family members, being treated like an idiot by telephonic customer services: 'have you switched it on?', receiving no respect. I could go on but hope you get my picture.

Aka love it grin. sadly I am too big and bulky to play the 'little ol' lady'. My MiL was tiny and played it from her mid fifties, she even walked across the road waving her stick expecting cars to stop. Amazingly she lived to be 92. My own mother was pretty good at it too.

Thanks for making me smile smile