Mrs, Miss or Ms

Actually that isn't entirely true. I know a few older unmarried women here in France who insist on being called Mlle.
I became a feminist in the early seventies, but had been Mrs for a few years by then so never bothered to change. I have never experienced any kind of dogmatic attitude about Mrs / Ms. I also stuck with my married name out of habit and was quite surprised to find that my maiden name was used so frequently here in France as I had almost forgotten it by the time we moved here. I do like the use of Monsieur, Madame though.
For surnames I like the Spanish way, where married women keep their original names and the children have father's first surname followed by mother's first surname. Seems to work fine.

If you are French, you are Mlle until your twenties or so, and them Mme. Marital status has nothing to do with it. Similarly in Germany, young women are Fraulein, maturity brings you the name of Frau.
This once used to be the case in this country too, Miss was a young girl (or a prostitute) and all grown women were called Mistress, abbreviated Mrs.
I am divorced, but see no reason to use an invented title.

Inequality bugs me more than the title. I call my hairdresser Sarah and she calls me Leticia. It would be wrong for me to use Sarah and insist on Mrs for me.

That is what I was told. I was told that it wasn't a personal choice and I had to have Ms in support of all women- which is why I started this thread.
I think it is personal choice and people should respect it- not coerce me to their way of thinking.

All my sons call their bosses by their first name at work, Ana, in 3 very different fields and always have. As a teacher I called the Head Teachers by their first name.

Leticia did you mean that militant feminists have told you that you should be Ms or else you are a disgrace to womanhood?
If so, of course they have no right to tell you that.
If not, where did you get the idea?

In Scotland there is no need to use deed poll to change your name. It is legal simply to notify everyone relevant and, perhaps, publish a notice in the newspaper.
As long as there is no intention to defraud or suchlike, all is fine.

Marmark1 its nice to know you are so smug secure and confident.
Stay or go, I don't expect anyone's bothered.

50 years ago I was so proud to become Mrs and prove that I could get married. It also meant a new surname having always had to spell my birth name. I hadn't reckoned with the inability of local people to understand a name beginning with H - not a sound used here - so I have to spell my 4 letter surname. When he cleared off I kept the Mrs because I felt that was what I was. I think Ms is horrid.
If you want to revert to your maiden name there is a cost as it has to be done by deed poll.

One of my first jobs was at a family firm. The four family members who were directors all had the same surname, so we got to call them by their first names...preceded by Mr.

I know some workplaces are quite relaxed about such matters now... wouldn't have happened in my day

Oh, I see, you're saying children should use a title for their teachers.

So when they start work they should be able to call their boss by his or her first name?

What titles do children in school need?

I can't see why we need a title. I can't remember the last time I needed one.
Children in school are about the only necessity. Even the doctor calls me in by first name surname.

We disagree on here all the time, but we do try not to insult one another (most of the time)

I have noticed that those who are most quick to be scathing are usually also very quick to think that they are being unfairly got at.

I can see why in some situations the fact that men are not defined by their title could be annoying. I admit I hadn't thought about it that way.

It is personal choice of course.

Marmark1 disagreeing is not a problem but I do think some of your posts are a little smug...e.g. your post at 19.08.12

This must be personal choice IMO. I am proud to be married to Mr. Pud (43 year) so like being called Mrs. I don't feel demeaned by it in any way. But if some people prefer to use Ms. what is the problem?

I am Mrs, but I don't require anybody to address me as Mrs, either when they're are talking to me or writing to me. I do object to Ms and I get really cross if it is forced upon me.
In fact I don't see the need to address me with a title at all, just call me Sarah.

jane, I am sorry, but having worked in senior management in the uk for so long- I know what the law says, and the reality on the ground, can be very different. I'm sure you do too. So many ways of getting around the law.
But the UK is indeed way ahead in this field, not the case in many European countries.

Ms on every official form and bank account, ever since I was old enough to need one.

Most of the time now I use no title at all.

I think Mrs. hearkens back to times when women were supposed to be delighted to have 'caught' a male. They could then think they were better than their unmarried peers. So many women now don't even take the husband's/partner's surname, let alone use a title.

I thought it was grossly unfair that there was no way by which you could tell whether some male you met at a nightclub was married or not, whereas you were supposed to be known by your married title. Although in my ignorance, I always thought that being married would protect me from the attentions of married men. I was very wrong!

Granjura it is illegal in this country for employers to discriminate against someone because of their gender and by implication, their marital status.
So it doesn't matter what anyone chooses as their title, if any.

I don't want you to leave gransnet Marmark. What a strange thing to say.

No uptight or indignant here, just don't happen to agree with you on this subject. There may be others where we would agree. That's the beauty of gransnet as you will discover if you stick around. It's not life or death, just a discussion forum!

I'm not bothered either way, Marmark1

Ah well, if the cap fits.
At least I'm secure and confident enough to stand by what I've said.
A couple of you are so uptight and indignant I must be right.
Keep up the fight.
Me,I'm going to snuggle up to my MAN and watch ,Life of Pi.
Incidentally,would you ALL like me to leave Gransnet.Or just some of you.

Agreed on the private level- but can see how discriminatory it is on the professional and institutional level.

I am happy to be MRS, abd happy and proud to be his wife. He is happy to be my husband- so all is fine. If he applies for a job, or becomes active politcally, his marital status is irrelevant and not stated- mine is. That's fine by me- but it is discriminatory. Stating this does NOT make me a 'silly little insecure radical feminist' - at all.