Mrs, Miss or Ms

Well, that's the OP told...

No, VQ, it doesn't matter. And it's nobody else's business either.

Does it matter what we're called as long as we're happy with it? Some people like Miss. Others Ms and others Mrs.

Between marriages I was a Ms. I didn't feel like a Miss because I'd been married but I didn't want to stay a Mrs. Now I'm remarried I'm a Mrs again.

Each to her own.

So 'silly little insecure radical feminist' isn't judgemental?

No Marmark it doesn't mean disagreeing. It means what Farnorth said in her post at 16.56 today. Your first posts on this thread were insulting to men and to women. On the other hand, I can't see where anyone has judged you.

I don't care what title anyone chooses for themselves, but I do object to being labelled 'an insecure radical feminist who feels inferior to men' or words to that effect just because I choose to use Ms. That is not disagreeing with someone, it's being very rude to someone.

I see Night owl,Judge mental means disagreeing.
Didn't realise that.

I like being a Mrs. I don't feel defined by my marital status. I like being my husband's wife.

As I see it, many women resent the fact that their marital status is implicit in the way they are addressed. Fair enough, I suppose , as it had its roots in the status of a woman as a good, a chattel. Try calling someone Mademoiselle in France, or Fraulein in Germany, to upset EU relations...

You have been very judgmental Marmark, so you can't act all offended now.

And just to open up another can of worms, a lot of women don't like to be addressed as 'girls' either

Hey,wait up,some of you people.
I'm just contributing my opinion.Because it differs from yours,that's fine,it's called democracy.
I'm not the one saying do as I say.And I'm very upset at the implication.
If that's the way you conduct your discussions,then yes you do have something to learn.
Please don't be so quick to judge me.

I would be perfectly happy to be an over 60yr old Miss- sounds much better than Ms.

I can't see what is wrong with Miss. Some of the most successful women have been Miss and proud of it.
I wouldn't use Master or Miss for children - I just use their names and so Miss is fine for adults.
It makes it sound as if it a better choice to be married!

What a minefield it is, when some people feel they have the right to dictate how others should live. Be a Mrs, give up your name to become Mrs X and ensue none of your children carry your own family name into the future. A ban on double barrelled names and anyone married who doesn't toe the line, take their husbands name and become a Mrs is a "radical feminist" - I must be living in a parallel universe where it's ok to make your own choices.

Do you know what,I'm one of those ancient beings,"normal "(well almost)Traditionalist.I have three sisters we all have grown up married kids,
So far we have not had any divorces,I have a large group of friends.Two very best friends,I've known for,one 40 years and one 25 years.We all meet up twice a week.So,I think I'll stay in my little world,we can't all be wrong.
Very best of luck to all you trend setters.Count me out,I'm very happy having lattes with my friends and playing with my granddaughter.No offence girls.

It's really only up to the individual what they wish their title to be. I'm a Mrs and happy to be so. What I really object to is being called by my Christian name by someone who doesn't know me from Adam and doesn't ask if they can. Often they use the proper version of my name, not the shorter version I'm usually known by. Equally annoying are people who shorten my name even more!!!

As said, I like the way the 'Miss' had disappeared in most European countries and replaced by a Mrs for all. I am not personally bothered at all, and it has NOT stopped me in my tracks- but why should a man be able to send a job application which has not indication of his marital status, and same at interview- and not a woman? It is also terribly derogatory for some to be called 'Miss' when over, say 40- with all the value judgements made there too.

I don't like Ms either- so the Mrs for all would be much better, like 'Madame' or 'Frau'.

Ginny sums it up well.

You might want to change to Ms if your marriage broke up and you had children and wanted to have the same surname as them. Also not sure I would want to be called Mrs if i wasn't married anymore.

I worked in the community health service, at 23 I was Mrs ( even addressed this way by elderly people) but by the time I retired at 64 everyone used my Christian name. What ever I was called it was always with respect so that is what counted.

Marmark1, you said you did not see any insult in your post.
You wrote :
"Using your wife's surname maybe makes you a bit of a doormat?"
That is insulting to any man who does that and also, by implication, to his wife.
And :
"Radical Feminist.In my very humble opinion,mean women who feel inferior,especially to men."
That is an insulting opinion to hold.

I like the idea of not having double barrelled names, granjura, it sounds a very sensible rule.

I think we should stick with free choice and not be told what to do by anyone.
We are all different and what is 'right' for one person isn't 'right' for another.

Why should we have our marital status used as a title?
Neither of my dds have taken their husbands' names and why should they?
Let 's move away from the patriarchal heritage once and for all!

I am Mrs as I am Frau in Germany, All women over the age of 16 are Frau, fräulein is considered derogatory. it does make life simple. Both my daughters have kept their surnames. Their children can take either name but all children in one family must have the same surname, but not the parents.

Happy to be Mrs. Hated my unpronounceable maiden name. Also Pa was a bit horrid so glad to no longer "belong" to him...

DD was Mr and Ms when they got married - now she is a Rev., not sure how the letters are addressed to the two. Mr. & Rev? They both changed their names when they got married to a blended name... Eugh

lol, how sensible ;)

I use my name double barrelled here, as I have adopted my Brit OH surname, but for so many reasons it is useful that people know what my maiden name was (as I was born and bred here). Very useful in this case ;)

However, here in our village, I am always known as 'Monsieur G's daughter'.

How controlling