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(14 Posts)
downtoearth Thu 08-Oct-15 18:44:24

ooh er ...reported

friends123 Thu 08-Oct-15 18:22:12

Message deleted by Gransnet for breaking our forum guidelines. Replies may also be deleted.

sandye Sun 06-Sept-15 19:52:32

sorry something must be wrong with the computer, I forgot i'd done it the first time, my brain buzzing with other things, but didn't do it a third time. hope it dosn't appear again.

Charleygirl Sun 06-Sept-15 13:26:35

This is the 3rd time that you have started this thread.

sandye Sun 06-Sept-15 13:20:11

Thanks, I think legal advice is the best way. I don't want to fight as it's a waste of money, my daughter is mentally disabled so can't do anything. No I was not in favor of the breakup. It hit me out of the blue. He already has someone else so there's no going back. I want to be fair and let him take half but he can't afford to buy me out. it's how I'm going to live that's bothering me. part time wage goes nowhere and as my name is on both deeds I'm stuck.

sandye Sun 06-Sept-15 13:13:36

no they are both paid for

petra Mon 31-Aug-15 17:01:26

Sandye. Are the properties mortgaged?

NotTooOld Mon 31-Aug-15 16:44:19

I agree. Definitely get legal advice and do nothing until you've got it. In particular, do not move out of the accommodation you are currently in. When you have an appointment to see a solicitor, sit down (perhaps with your daughter) and make a clear list of what you want to know. Take the list with you and write down the answers, as it is all too easy to get home and realise you did not get all the information you wanted. It could be a good idea to take a clear headed friend with you, not to say anything necessarily, but just to listen. Two heads may be better than one.

It's not clear from what you say whether you are in favour of the split? if you are, is there no possibility that you and your husband could sit down and come to an amicable agreement? It would be a lot cheaper than getting legal advice.

vampirequeen Mon 31-Aug-15 13:08:49

Definitely get legal advice. Your husband can't make all the decisions just like that. You have rights too.

Eloethan Sun 30-Aug-15 23:54:50

I agree with the other comments - it's essential that you get proper legal advice. Hopefully then you - and your husband - will be made aware that your husband can't just unilaterally decide what is to be done. You have rights too so don't be bulldozed into anything.

Get some quotes from various solicitors because their rates can vary considerably - and if possible see if you can find any client reviews.

It must be a very difficult time for you but I hope that eventually things work out all right for you and your daughter.

annodomini Sun 30-Aug-15 23:03:06

You really must, in the circumstances, seek legal advice for your own sake and that of your daughter. A number of solicitors will give half an hour's initial advice and if you can find one of these, I advise you to make a note of all your issues so as not to waste a minute of the time. The Law Society has a web site which will help you to choose a solicitor. CAB will also provide confidential advice free of charge.

HappyNan1 Sun 30-Aug-15 22:58:53

Actually, your husband can't just do as he pleases. I think you should get legal advice asap. Sorry, I don't understand what you mean by the rental? Could you live with your daughter? I'm sure other gn's will soon pick up on your post and be able to offer more advice and help. I'm just sitting here thinking how shattered you must be feeling and wishing I could help you.

HappyNan1 Sun 30-Aug-15 22:48:23

Oh dear Sandye, have just read your post and need to think about it to see if I can think of any useful info for you, but in the meantime want to send you and your daughter big hugs of support. You must be devastated , I don't know what to say other than you'll get lots of support den GNs.

sandye Sun 30-Aug-15 22:39:35

my husband has decided after 40 years to call it quits. problem. we have two houses and our disabled daughter lives in one and I cnt afford to live in the other. he wont sell the rental ether, want whats best for her but I dnt want to end up renting when we have two houses also I work part time and so dn't get benefits