What do you think of Round Robins?

Thanks for encouragement. I have some 40 first cousins, and had 13 aunts and uncles (+ spouses) all over the world, it is so expensive these days to sned family news... and before when the sprogs were small, I just didn't have time/money for all this; though I did try hard. I was the only niece to send news to family!

We only get one and that's enough.

It always arrives on the 1st December as though they just can't wait to let everyone know about their massive achievements and holidays to places you've never heard of.

The card goes on the mantlepiece but the letter goes in the bin - after I've read it of course because I find shouting FFS a few times quite theraputic.

I was ensconced on the throne whilst perusing latest epistle.......................

They do get through the winter better than skinny ones especially when the North wind doth blow, and we shall have snow.

Next question?

We always get one from an ex-colleague. Reams of it, typed out. She tells me all about how well her children are doing (I'm ashamed to say I can hardly remember her children, in fact I don't think I ever met them).
I don't know why people assume others are interested in the ins and outs of their lives. If I haven't seen someone for a while I just send a card and add 'I hope you are all well.' That's enough. (In my opinion!)

Alea

I love getting these letters every year. It's great to hear how everyone is getting on. It's the highlight of opening my Christmas Cards.

I get two every year.

One is a combination of how bad things have been for them/their family and boastfuless. What bugs me about this one is that irrespective of how close they are to the recipient, they clearly think their news will be interesting, whilst having no regard for the recipient's own circumstances. Sadly, this person died this year after a short illness and I doubt her husband will continue the tradition.

The other is from an old friend who will always be a friend, no matter how long it is since we last met. I love her letter because I can here her voice as a read it. I also know all of the people she talks about and I want to know about them. I know we'll meet up again at some point in the future and it will feel like we only saw each other recently. It's just one of those friendships.

If I had to put my finger on the real difference for me between the two newsletters, it's that the first one lacks humility. The second one always sounds like they are thankful for any good fortune that came their way.

I've reached the age when I dread what news these Christmas letters may bring. Have I sent a card to someone who is no longer there?

I miss my brother's MIL's round robins (she died last year) She always countered each achievement with a bit of reality. They probably weren't meant to be crushing put-downs but they always made me laugh.

My favourite was, 'During our usual sherry party after church last Sunday, we gathered to admire the beautiful oak panelled fencing that our neighbour has erected and from which we are happy to benefit. The postman will no doubt be pleased that he no longer has to run for his life now that their snappy collie dog is safely enclosed.'

I bet she didn't send one to the neighbour.

I absolutely HATE round robins ! We received one out of the blue from someone we hadn't heard from in years (despite me sending Christmas cards etc.) it was basically, one extremely long brag from beginning to end.

Dear friends

We sold XYZ house for squillions
We now drive a top of the range whatever
I have taken early retirement and have a massive final salary pension
Just recently returned from a round the world cruise and can't wait for our next one.....
blah blah bloody blah.

They have no children (so no DGC)

We wrote back a brief note saying;

Glad to hear you are doing well. We have just returned from a week in our caravan with our 3 wonderful grandchildren who mean the world to us.

We haven't heard a word since. Yippee.

Oops! I do know when to use here and hear, but my tablet doesn't.

Strangely disappointed to receive a card but no RR from a couple whose annual effusions always made us laugh. Have they finally stopped writing them, or have we been relegated to the ranks of those unworthy to receive their news?

No, I'm afraid I despise the round robin for all the reasons given, the boastfulness, the assumption that you even remember their offspring, never mind give a flying feck how many millions they're making in the first year out of University.
But the worst thing about them is that you know the letter has not been written for you alone. Actually, it's not a letter, rather a self-published newspaper, photocopied and circulated to everyone in their mailing list. It's impersonal to the point of rudeness, and it's lazy.
I have a 'friend' who no longer sends proper Christmas cards, but donates the cost to charity and sends Jackie Lawson e-cards instead. We received ours yesterday. I was pretty disgusted to find that she couldn't even go to the trouble of sending a personal e-card - the greeting was "Wishing you all a Merry Christmas etc. etc...." Clearly she had chosen one card, added a generic message and sent it to everyone on her 'Christmas Card List'. So much quicker, why go to the bother of putting individual, personal greetings on? Actually, why bother keeping up with anyone at all if it's so much trouble?

I think these dreadful round robin letters have fallen out of favour a bit over recent years. Several years ago I remember my sister in law's hubby reading out one his brother had written It was a classic of the genre of self congratulation.

I used to like getting them. The newsy ones from old friends were interesting, the boasty ones were hilarious. I think their fate was sealed when Simon Hoggart asked people to send any they received to him and compiled a (very funny) book. I wish I dared send them myself - I've a dozen cards sitting here waiting for me to write a dozen personal letters (brief and non-boasty, I hasten to add!).

Sadiesnan - I'm with you on enjoying reading my friend's letters.

I only send cards and letters to people who are our friends and since we all know each others families it is lovely to exchange the photos as well as the news of all their 'doings' and attainments. We do occasionally ring to chat during the year but health issues and moving home have meant we haven't done that so much lately and we have done very little visiting so the letters are a means of staying in touch.
I do like to hear about their trips and look at the map to see where the places are and I often look them up to find out what is there too. It is interesting to me particularly as I probably won't ever travel much again, it is a vicarious kind of enjoyment.
I don't mind a bit that they also write to lots of people and add an extra bit for me, I'm just pleased to receive my letter.

I've been doing a RR for years, before they were even known as RR's. Due to the wandering lives(!) dh and I have led we have friends all over the world. I guess because many of them are older, they don't have email so a letter is the main contact. I haven't time to hand-write that many letters, so it's a RR or nothing. I always add a personal bit to them and I hope they're just a bit of family news, not a humblebrag.

I had a very touching card today from a very elderly lady, which was written by her daughter, telling us that she had had a severe stroke and could no longer write but please could we send her our letter as she loves to know how we're doing. I also had just a card from a friend who I know is going blind. I fear the lack of a letter means she's getting worse.

I rather enjoy the RR from an old school friend whose family seems to keep the NHS in business, including her daughter, who has numberless children by various fathers, none of whom seems to be on the scene. This year her letter was enhanced by a detailed description of the machinations surrounding her mother's ashes!

The letter detailing the 0.000072nd of a second that a friend manages to shave off her marathon running time is also welcome, although she seems to have turned her hand to sea-fishing now which doesn't make for as satisfying a letter as marathons.

The smug letter from a couple who went to live in Sicily (or Crete? Or Cyprus? Or Corfu?) and Will Never Return to the UK doesn't get an answer. It makes good fuel for the fire, though.

We used to get one from a family which listed all the cub badges, swimming medals, GCSEs etc of,the various offspring. This stopped when one of the sons got his girlfriend pregnant when he was 18!

It isn't the RR - it is the friends who send them. People are so horrible about them but do they really expect a handwritten, personal letter? People generally write letters on the computer and of course you cut and paste. The bulk of my letter is the same with a personal start and ending.
I like them and like to follow the lives of friends over the years.what I can't stand is people who just sign their names with no news- pointless.
However I would have cut the friendship years ago if I didn't actually like them and didn't want to hear their news. I have never had one of these boastful ones that people always bring forward as examples.

I totally agree with you Leticia and love receiving them as they come from friends I hardly ever see. I did get one once which was little more than a list of all the cat shows they had won (so not worthy of being kept to be re-read!) but most are of the newsy not boasting type. When I sent cards (which I no longer do) I always enclosed a RR. Now I ring people up and chat.

I try to sum up the year - what we're all doing including children and grandchildren. I try to make it funny to give people a laugh. I include holidays places, delights and mishaps. I didn't write one in 2009 when my Dad died and I haven't written one this year as Mum died and they could never be a line in a letter amongst other news.
I keep them and those I get in return because they make an interesting social history like potted diaries. I have them going back years.

I dont send round robins but I do get two from america and one from canada which I like as they are full of catch up news.
I do however put a poem in each card I send and every one seems to like it. In fact last year I had to send a new year card to a friend of dh as I had forgotten the christmas card and they were waiting for their poem. I get the poems on a christmas poetry site.
Merry christmas everyone. I just love reading gransnet!

I think , if people send cards it should just be the cards, These days it is not
hard to keep in touch, so why save all the news until the end of the year, when we are too busy to really read the letter!

I've sent RRs for years, ever since I sat down one Christmas and was filled with dread and inertia at the thought of all the individual letters I had to write. They seem to be appreciated, and the most unlikely people, whom I've decided to omit from my list for that year, send me cards saying how much they are looking forward to my news, so I have to quickly re-instate them . I do write a brief personal note inside each card, too.
I also look forward to receiving RRs along with personal letters, and, like BRedhead59, keep them and my own to refresh my very poor memory in future years.