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Coming to terms with grandchildren growing up

(45 Posts)
spotsandstripes Thu 17-Dec-15 12:46:16

I'm new to Gransnet but I'm glad I discovered it. Seems like some funny and wise conversations going on.
My youngest grandchild turns 6 (on Christmas eve). She's the last one and I'm feeling a bit sad that there will be no more babies or toddlers. Luckily she is very loving and excited about Christmas (as are the older ones) but can't help but feel a little teary that the days of rocking horses and duplo and festive bibs are over. What am I going to do when she reaches her teens!? smile

MiniMouse Thu 17-Dec-15 12:54:55

Don't worry, by then you'll be in your second childhood and enjoying Duplo etc yourself! tchwink

Welcome, by the way tchsmile

loopylou Thu 17-Dec-15 13:06:28

Welcome spotsandstripes ?

I'm loving Duplo and toy cars second time round- and making a mess in the bathroom with bubbles and crazy foam!

Anya Thu 17-Dec-15 13:13:40

Cultural her friendship spotsand

My DD only has boys and would have loved a girl, so she has cultivated a wonderful relationship with her 4 & 6-year old nieces and they go shopping together and out for lunch.

My DD has terrible dress sense and recently they steered her away from yet another of the silly tops she favours and persuaded her to buy something much more appropriate and classy.

Out of the mouths of babes???tchhmm

OlderNoWiser Thu 17-Dec-15 13:14:01

That is what I thought not long ago - the youngest is now five and going to school and I felt quite sad to think I would never hold a new-born baby again or cuddle a toddler ... until my son announced there will be another one in May next year - unplanned, unexpected, but now very much wanted and looked forward to by everyone. As long as he gets the loft extension finished on time grin

Indinana Thu 17-Dec-15 13:39:00

Welcome spotsandstripes. We have a 6 month old granddaughter, but I'm almost certain she will be the last grandchild, so we are soaking it up, making memories to last a lifetime. There's still loads of fun to be had with a 6 year old - and 7, 8, 9 and so on. Enjoy every stage!
Congratulations ONW, what a lovely piece of unexpected news smile

tanith Thu 17-Dec-15 14:05:06

Spotsandstripes just enjoy them while you may you can have fun with teenagers, before you know it along comes a Great Grand child like me, the first was born last june to my oldest granddaughter and there is another one due in June next year, so my daughter is a grandma already.

mcem Thu 17-Dec-15 14:07:28

My youngest DGD is 5 and thoroughly enjoying all the festive nonsense. She has an older sister of 15 who reassures me that we don't lose our GDCs as they grow.
We have long chats, lunches together and shopping trips.
DS gets married in May and they're keen to start a family in a couple of years so fingers are crossed for another one or two?????
Welcome to GN!

HildaW Thu 17-Dec-15 15:02:43

'Coming to terms with grandchildren growing up'....I'm sorry but what the hells wrong with that....the fact that they are growing up into interesting wonderful fascinating people is hardly something to feel sorry about.

MargaretX Thu 17-Dec-15 15:36:53

well said Hilda its the fact that babyhood and childhood pass that makes it interesting: some poor people have babies and children that remain a child all their lives. They're the ones who should be feeling sorry for themselves.

Granarchist Thu 17-Dec-15 15:56:10

My late mil was brilliant with her GC as babies and toddlers but once they had opinions of their own she became really quite unpleasant. DD once drove half way across England from uni to visit her (when she could not afford the petrol and worked nights as a carer to fund uni) mil greeted her at the door with "I dont suppose you look after that car properly do you?" It was so hurtful. She preferred the elder GD and made it quite clear to younger GD - whenever younger child passed an exam or got selected for a GB (she is an athlete) she was accused of showing off!!!! Luckily the girls are v close and laughed it off, but I was furious OH did not challenge her behaviour. So what I am trying to say is that as they change they actually can become more interesting and you can have fun with them in other ways. My own mother adored both of them and it was reciprocated. She always was up to speed with their subject choices, sports teams, even their friends names etc. I must remember to do that as my GC get older.

morethan2 Thu 17-Dec-15 16:40:33

Welcome. My 8th and probably last grandchild goes to school next year and like you there's a pang of sadness. Especially as it's the year I'm due to retire. Friday's is their 'Nanna day" we were in the car last Friday when she piped up "Nanna when I go to school next year I'm going to tell them I can't come on a Friday because it's Nanna's day! I said nowt but thought to myself " good luck with that" still there's school holidays. My older ones 20,18,15,14 are still pleased to see me but as expected don't want to cuddle up anymore. I still get a peck on the cheek and a 'love you nan.' I've given them memories to treasure, just as they have for me. Great isn't it

annodomini Thu 17-Dec-15 17:23:11

morethan - never mind. In a few years, great-grandchildren might come along!

milkflake Thu 17-Dec-15 17:46:34

I feel the same spotsandstripes, I love babies but no more coming my way. I do have 4 amazing GC and 2 step GC, so I am lucky. they range from 8 to 22.

Anniebach Thu 17-Dec-15 17:54:24

So much more to come, my grandchildren are 23, 18 and 16, each stage brings so much joy, you become their keeper of secrets, the please Grannie explain to dad I need that new dress , the 16 year old doesn't call me Grannie, she calls me Bro, this week brought a need for hugs for an 18 year old who had split from her first boy friend of six months !

My hope now is a fourth grandchild next year , have waited twenty years for this one.

Bellanonna Thu 17-Dec-15 18:54:39

You will probably be a GG Annie. How lovely. I won't be here for that but I'm loving every stage of the GC, now 3, 3 and 1 1/2. I love to watch their progress and find them more interesting than when they were babies. Each age has its rewards.

Coolgran65 Thu 17-Dec-15 19:02:08

My dgs is the eldest dgc at 8 years and it's wonderful to see her develop. She and I can nothing together so much better. Last week we both went to a craft event and made decorations from oranges and cloves. Large fabulous snowflakes from white paper and staples. You don't lose them, it just changes, and not for the worse.

Anniebach Thu 17-Dec-15 19:58:22

Hope not Bellanonna, university first

harrysgran Fri 18-Dec-15 09:53:09

I have one GC he is ten going on twenty growing up so fast I do feel a bit sad as he an only child and although I have another DD she and her partner don't want any children I do have a son so I'm keeping my fingers crossed I will be blessed with another GC one day.

Florentine Fri 18-Dec-15 09:58:58

I often reflect on how even my four year old grandson is no longer the baby he was, and our interaction has consequently changed. I expect it will keep changing, a bit like it did with my own children. I try to prepare myself for that. However, with two more grandchildren (2 years old, and 4 months respectively) and a little sister to the 4 year old, I have some time ahead of babies and little ones.

NanaandGrampy Fri 18-Dec-15 10:04:10

I know what you mean in a way spotsandstripes ! I had our youngest 2 DGS here the other day and the youngest is 20 months and now dishes out his cuddles more sparingly lol

I had all of my grandchildren sleepover from new born to give their mums a break and because I secretly love that time in the middle of the night where everyone else is asleep except you and the baby and you get a cuddle and a snuggle !!

BUT.... every age has its bonuses. I have one DGD - The Queen of the Universe and we shop together at the grand old age of 9 . We 'do lunch' and have a mooch round the shops or we go off for a girlie movie or swim .

With our 6 year DGS we go outside and play or we stay in and build HUGELY complicated lego things ( what happened to a simple box of bricks eh? ).

With our 4 year old DGS we play cars and do sticking and painting or head to the gym for a swim and soft play every week.

It just keeps gettiung better and better , so whilst I understand , don't be down hearted you've got years and years of playing left yet ;-)) x

KatyK Fri 18-Dec-15 10:04:18

We only have one granddaughter. She has been very much part of our lives since the day she was born, staying the night lots of times etc. She is 15 now and we don't see quite as much of her as we did, as she goes out more with her friends etc which is perfectly natural. I do miss her staying over (she still does but only occasionally now). However she is a really beautiful girl and as soon as she sees DH or me she flings her arms around us. smile

Sadiesnan Fri 18-Dec-15 10:15:24

My greatest wish is to see my grandchildren grow up. I had ovarian cancer two years ago, so every day with my family is a bonus. I've made myself cry now.

nipsmum Fri 18-Dec-15 10:24:42

My youngest granddaughter will be 6 in the middle of January. Don't worry it just lets you move on with them Mine are all a great source of joy no matter what age they are. Iv'e just spent most of last week attending school plays which they were involved in and many tears of joy were shed. Its better as well as different

Victoria08 Fri 18-Dec-15 10:25:35

Tomorrow I am being left in sole charge of my three month old grandson while his respective parents go of to London for the day.
This is the first time I have had him for this long, and am feeling a bit apprehensive. He is a lovely baby and normally very happy, as long as he is being played with and fed at regular intervals.
I guess I am worried something might go wrong. Silly really, I guess. But you never know.

Do any other grans feel nervous having sole charge.

Also I have a bad back, and after several hours of lifting and changing nappies etc, I feel exhausted.