Article about wife who put up with 35 years of husband's cheating

I know this thread is 7 years old but sometimes it's good to have thoughts on this as it is an ongoing issue mostly for women.
I think men have had their own way for far too long and many women put up with bad behaviour.

Remember the Conservative politician Alan Clarke? He died about 20 years ago.He mamrried his wife when she was 16, took his mistress on his honeymoon and published his diaries that listed his 'indiscretions'

His wife accepted it. She left it to him, stayed at home and minded the family castle.

Some people, men and women, are prepared to accept the deaal.

However, I do think there is a difference between knowing your partner is a serial shopper and having the situation denied or not talked about.

My cousin had a creep like this for a husband and put up with it for years and years. She finally threw him out and found a new life, new interests and new friends. He was a nasty,nasty man and many knew about his little affairs but she just closed her eyes to it until it became blaringly obvious when she was over 60 years old.

This sorry tale seems sad to me; sad that this woman has squandered so much of her life on her callous lecher of a husband constantly in pursuit of sex; fondling pregnant women openly, copulating on the baby's bedroom floor, serial 'affairs,'( actually free sex to scratch an itch), and she thinks it is all over now because he has hit fifty
.
It is her choice, but I wonder if now that she apparently has him all to herself the scales will fall from her eyes and she will see just how worthless he is.
Reminds me of Alan Clark of the Diaries, another serial adulterer, and his doormat wife Jane whom he made promise would never marry again.
Probably because she might find out what a poor lover he was.

I suppose grandtanteJE65 as she has written publicly about it all she is inviting comment. Like you I think that's surprising.
I don't think that it being a 7 or 8 year old thread really matters.

I'd be interested to know if he has really stopped though!

grandtanteJE65

No, I am not shocked. This woman made a choice to stay with an unfaithful husband, so he must have had so many good points that she found it worthwhile to put up with his infidelity.

I would probably not have done so, but that does not give me the right to judge her conduct ,

What shocks me is that others feel the need to comment on such a private matter, and I confess to surprise that the woman concerned feels the need to write about it publically.

"What shocks me is that others feel the need to comment on such a private matter"... You mean like you just have? Pot calling Kettle.. How do you read me?.. Over..

Moreso in the past than now, choosing to stay with a repeat-philanderer husband was often a case of economic necessity, as many women were totally financially dependent on their spouse's income. Reading about the case (which is 7 years old, by the way), it appears that the wife had calculated that she might struggle to support herself, so just chose to bite the bullet and to let it all continue. I guess that there are still some who do that these days, but thankfully not as many. Personally, I've been lucky in that respect, but have always made it clear that if betrayed even once, all trust would be gone, so it would definitely be game over. One of our Daughters has not been so fortunate, and was married to a serial offender who she finally kicked out when our first Grandson was a mere 8 months old. That was 10 years ago now. He returned to France, his home country, and mutual friends have told us he has now got through two more partners, is on to a third, and is paying alimony for 3 children, including our Grandson, who gets little enough. He is living in a tiny flat in a very poor area, and is skint. Ain't Karma wonderful?

Well she has had plenty of time now to mull it over , this is a VERY OLD thread

No, I am not shocked. This woman made a choice to stay with an unfaithful husband, so he must have had so many good points that she found it worthwhile to put up with his infidelity.

I would probably not have done so, but that does not give me the right to judge her conduct ,

What shocks me is that others feel the need to comment on such a private matter, and I confess to surprise that the woman concerned feels the need to write about it publically.

My Father started straying soon after the birth of their child ( a honeymoon baby ).
He continued this lifestyle throughout a forty year marriage. My Mum knew about all his flings. He was still enjoying himself when I appeared, twenty years later. By that time I think Mum felt relieved that she didn't have to play an active part in their marriage. He never left home but continued to have his cake and eat it, as it were. His philandering only stopped when Mum died an early death, then he was quick to marry his latest woman.

Maggierose

Anne Glenconnor, Lady in Waiting to Princess Margaret, also stayed married to her vile, unfaithful and violent husband. When he died he left everything to his manservant/friend. Wife and children got nothing.

Yes, he was an atrocious man. Her autobiography is very interesting. Seriously dysfunctional families, just with lots of money.

I believe the reason is she needs to justify staying is because she is actually quite miserable about it all but to leave 30 odd years later underlines those "wasted years".

She needs to justify her life choices by making them sound more reasonable to herself.

Anne Glenconnor, Lady in Waiting to Princess Margaret, also stayed married to her vile, unfaithful and violent husband. When he died he left everything to his manservant/friend. Wife and children got nothing.

At least not about the bonobo bit, but clearly unfaithfulness in sexual relationships is rife in humanity. Also in chimpanzees, which includes bonobos who seem to have got the shrug right.

Not being serious, btw.

There must be as many unfaithful women as there are men. Takes two to tango.

Maybe we should go all bonobo.

I’ve heard of the odd woman who didn’t mind her husband having affairs - usually IIRC one who’d gone right off sex, so happy for him to get it elsewhere - as long as he didn’t actually leave her.

I knew someone like that. She put up with it because she didn't want to be on her own!!

No one mentions the women who enter affairs with married men. Who and where are they? I had a friend about 50 years ago who was 18 and was having an affair with a married man twice her age whose daughter was also a teenager. All sorts of nasty comments were made about his wife etc and how poorly he was treated (he was in a high paid job) and how he was going to leave her etc, etc, etc. Hearing the other side made me realise that there are those that do and those that don't. My friend was taken in by his big job and sob stories. He went back to his wife and I believe is now in his 80s. Sad man! My friend went on to have a cheating husband who, for want of a better word, was very creepy.

NotAGran55

7 😂 I give up!

😂😂

... it's the weather!

7 😂 I give up!

8 not 78 ha ha

THIS THREAD IS 78 YEARS OLD!

The likes of Tom Jones is different an extremely wealthy man that’s why the wife put up with it as many women do. What’s the saying “money money money it’s a rich man’s world”.

My ex was not wealthy as soon as I found out he was unfaithful
I got rid as soon as I could!

Not surprised at all.

The old mentality of "men are not supposed to be monogamous" and "divorce is shameful"