Noisy rude children

I feel very sorry for Marieeliz. We have one child amongst the bunch that play out round here, with a very piercing voice. Sets my nerves on edge! We were never that noisy when we played out. The parents should be more reasonable.

Not having heard these children it would be unfair to condemn them

I also feel sorry for the OP. I can only think that people telling her to lighten up and try to make friends have never lived near children who have no parental control and whose parents will come round threatening if you say anything.

I previously suggested being friendly (not over friendly) with children if they are within speaking distance. Definitely didn't suggest that OP should lighten up.
Of course I feel sorry for the OP, to feel so anxious all of the time must be so upsetting - but it's what to do about it.

Telling them to be quiet or to go away isn't working.
And so I would see the alternative as trying from a different angle.
There are always parents who do not exercise control and are happy for their children to be out of their hair, but they are unlikely to come around threatening if you say to a child - are you enjoying your school holidays !

I have been there with children who congregate, make noise etc. There is a wall about 15 yards from my garden which they find very useful for meeting, kicking a ball, doing cartwheels. To be critical and tell them to go away wouldn't have worked, especially when they are in numbers and feeling brave.

I went over to them, said hello, asked if they had any little brothers or sisters, and what's it like when they can't get to sleep...... My little dgd is trying to sleep in that bedroom up there and when you kick the ball it keeps her awake, she is very tired and grumpy. Could you help me by playing very quietly or moving down the road a bit (yes I know that would be outside another house) and then I said thank you and said - does anyone want a sweet - of course they did. Bye now.... see you another time.

They now say hello to me, sometimes they still too noisy.

I didn't read the parents had been around threatening

I didn't say these parents had, I do know of situations where parents have. Also where parents have been to school threatening teachers who have tried to discipline children.

It was 7 girls from 7 to 10 screaming every few minutes. Only one child lives here. All the others live in a safe close 5 minutes away. I went out and asked them not to scream. The older one said "have a nice evening" which I felt was cheeky. My other neighbour went out later and asked them to make less noise and go back to their own road. The following morning the Mum , next door, waved to me and I said that I had to tell them of for screaming, she was fine and said they are all from the close and some of them are big girls who she did not know having only moved in. I spoke to the child next door later saying I was sorry for shouting at her but if all those children screamed I could not hear my TV. She said it's okay. She has played with one girl this evening quite normal play. Two boys,from the close, arrived later, they wer'nt involved previously. They started to play noisily. Just feel that children from a safe Close want to be where parents cannot see what they are up to. I played out as a child but parents where strict and you knew you were in trouble if you misbehaved. I worked in a school for 20 years so am aware of how children behave.

This CAN prey on the minds of some individuals whilst never affecting a majority. Perhaps another coping mechanism would be to seek out some help on how to deal with the situation via your GP surgery? I have no idea of the services offered there marieeliz, but some counselling may help and enable a broader perspective of thinking to emerge? It's worth a try perhaps?

Hmm- I DO feel sorry for you. We live in a quiet cul de sac & a few years ago a (nice) family moved in & their children started playing in the road in the evenings. That was Ok but then the parents & friends started to bring out chairs & wine etc & sit out there too. I was quite glad at first as the road has a sharp bend just before where they play & cars do come round very fast as it is a quiet road & I was worried about an accident. However now the parents join in the football & it goes on for ages. I do get annoyed when the ball is constantly retrieved from our garden & hits the cars etc. I guess that because I was never allowed to play out in the road & my children didn't as we lived in a rural area with no pavements I am just not used to it. Several times last year I had a skateboard ramp blocking my driveway when I got home. I must add they have a massive garden they could play in.
I am friendly with them & I was very polite when I asked that they do not block my drive but now the warm weather is back it has all started off again.
So I do sympathise - I suppose this is just something you have to put up with these days.

When we moved to this house 14 years ago we were tormented by teenagers. Ours is a corner house and the garden is open plan. They played football on the road, but our garden seemed to be part of the pitch. The ball would bang into plants, the garage door, and even our car. I lost it one day and screamed like a fishwife! They were amazed. It all stopped a few years ago as each of them grew out of being teenagers. Now many of them have moved away, got married, gone to live abroad etc., I'm just dreading a new generation of children starting the cycle again. If this happens I would move house.

I have a lot of sympathy for Marieeliz I used to live next door to a couple who would have their grandchildren visit and unfortunately they would bring along others with them as they only lived a couple of streets away they would come into my garden race around and the more I complained the worse it became it was a game to them I did feel targeted as I felt had I had family or a husband these children wouldn't of dared to be so rude and cheeky sadly I don't have an answer and thankfully I moved to a very quiet road it is busy with traffic but I'm glad to say I find this much easier to block out.

Children playing is one thing, screaming, shouting and peering in through windows is another. Sorry, but I think this type of behaviour starts in the home and the parents need to address this issue. An extreme view might regard this as anti-social behaviour or at lease the beginnings of it.

Agree totally LyndyLou. There is no such thing as self-control nowadays and no discipline either.Children playing are one thing-children constantly screaming or shouting are another.

I came back from 3 days away last week to find 6 footballs in my back garden. I just love the school holidays!

When my children were small they used to mention an old woman they called 'Grumpy' who constantly watched & scowled out of the window when they were playing. The children were well brought up & just playing normally, they did nothing to intentionally upset her but were very aware of her disapproval. Now I'm getting to 'Grumpy's' age myself & I can see things more from her point of view :D I'm not particularly troubled by children playing myself, but if it truly bothered me I'd think seriously about moving to an over 55's estate - less chance of lifestyles clashing there.

I have some sympathy with the OP. We all have certain sounds which we can find more irritating than others e.g. living where I do traffic noise doesn't bother me, it's just there.

Some time back I could hear a late night party going on in a nearby garden - sounded like late-teens. Music not too loud but much laughing and general noise.

What was really annoying was one girl's persistent shreiking !! I would have preferred they turn up the Drum & Bass to drown her out

I agree with you LyndyLou!! Why should we put up with screaming children> Like you, I played out in the street when I was a child, we also lived in a cul de sac. If our voices got too loud one of the parents would come out and tell us to tone it down. Why should this lady have to smile and appear not to be fed up by continuose noise? Where are the parents?It seems that these days, no-one wants to appear to chastise children as the "little darlings" might get upset.

Some helpful suggestions here. Although why I would trouble my GP I don't know. Got rid of nets to save danger of ladders and taking down to wash. The complaint is that most of these children are well out of their parents sight and they don't seem to care where they are as long as they are not bothering them. These houses are terraced small front garden. The
Close the children live in are all large properties. I am friendly with the couple of children in my road. Luckily I have an exit via an access road at the rear and I have been using that to take dog out so they don't know whether I am in or out.

Car is no longer left at front of house as another neighbour had sticks town at hers.

Just wish parents would be aware of where young children where they are just happy they are not bothering them.

Respect and courtesy is something that needs to be modeled and taught by adults so youngsters see expectations. Only the OP knows the level of deliberate poor behaviour generated by the children in question. Much of it may be within expectations of kids doing what kids should be doing..playing! If after polite requests to play more considerately the children were purposefully abusive then they are in the wrong. I have 4 noisy grandchildren and I am sure they could sound irritating to my 5 neighbours whose gardens border ours. Most of the time their noise is just normal play. Occasionally there may be a row but kids need these too to learn how to manage disagreement. Rudeness is one thing but generally play should be celebrated.

This is an update. It came to ahead this week.main culprit started picking up pebbles laid all over next doors garden, the resident was out but they still went in there. Throwing the stones at my car. I went out and asked them to stop. He says OKwhich he does all the time 2 mins later he starts again.This time my firm voice came out. Lip starts to tremble runs home to his road to Mum. Mum comes round to say I have made him cry. Not to shout at him, did not ask what he had done! So I told her said he wasn't under her supervision and he should be in his own quiet Close where she could see what he was up to. I had also told his Aunt last summer about him run nu g out between cars.

Also that my neighbours were all fed up with it. She did a double take then as she thought it was just me. Neighbours are but only have it after work. Said she would call police if I shouted again! That was Tuesday I have only seen him once going past with his father. I have had a lovely couple of days fingers crossed as two of them, in the group are away on hols but school back next week. As one of my neighbours said 6 weeks of it soon.

Sounds as if you now have a child free zone

I also have sympathy, particularly over the screaming. Neighbours of ours (thankfully now gone) had a trampoline in their garden and one child in particular would scream constantly - I mean that very high pitched scream - while she was on it, which was very often. She also screamed constantly while playing at anything in the communal areas. We used to have young children here, playing out, but I would not allow them to scream like that. And if neighbours ever complained, which was very rare, I would tell them firmly to turn the volume down, or else come inside.
Should add that I have never objected in the least to the normal sounds of children playing, but that sort of constant high pitched screaming goes right through me.