Children's misheard, misremembered or made up words.

I am impressed by the Vinegar Mary - because vinegar was viggerner
Envelopes were envelblokes and penguins were pengits (or peggerwings according to DN).

When my daughter was little she always pronounced th as an s. Her dad was in the Royal Marines and, on ceremonial occasions, he wore a pith helmet. My daughter wanted a helmet like Daddy's so, using a Weetabix box, a cocktail stick and a ball of play doh, I created her a helmet. She was very proud of it and wanted everyone to look at her pi** helmet!

My great-nephew told his mum he wanted to wear his long sleeved shorts when he wanted to put trousers on.

One of our best is a ' bouncealine '. which I think is far more descriptive than a trampoline !!!
Another one is 'masagine ' and 'dopey' for a segment of orange!! Don't even ask where that came from !!!

The best thing that I heard from our grand-daughter at the age of 3 and we were having an 'adventure' going into town on the top deck of the bus. She was constantly fidgeting, and when I asked what was the matter, she said 'Oh Nana, my bottom's eating my knickers'. ! ! !

Loved it! and she's still an absolute joy, even though, at times and being 14 I could cheerfully strangle her!

I distinctly remember being taught by my mum to stop at the kerb....but I thought it was the 'curve'. Well, it was curved where we were!

A friend (adult) was sort of just looking at the meat counter in Fortnums when one of the straw boater hatted chaps asked if he could help. Too embarrassed to say that she was browsing (perhaps not quite the done thing in a butchery department) she decided that perhaps she ought to buy something.

Quickly identifying the cheapest item on display, she confidently said "I'd like a wurkey tinglet, please"
The slightly raised eyebrow of the assistant alerted her to the fact that something was awry.

She recovered her composure (to a degree) and said "Oh tell you what, I'll have 2"

"Gloves" is a hard words for toddlers. My grandson used to say "Gubs". Now he's six and has no front teeth I can't understand anything he says.

My 3 year old GS has just started eating sausage goals.

My five yr old granson had a nukeuplaly for christmas . (Ukulele)

How about a donkey conker tree for a horse chestnut? That was from a four year old I taught - clearly I wasn't a very good teacher!

My grandmother used to tell my about the hymn she always thought was called "Gladly The Crosseyed Bear" For many years I thought Hyperbole was pronounced Hyper Bowl.

I always remember a wee girl at Easter saying she didn't like Jesus, because he ate people. . .totally confused I asked what she meant and she said it was in Lord of the Dance.
Dance, dance wherever you may be, I am the Lord of the dance said he, and I'll EAT YOU ALL WHEREVER YOU MAY BE, AND I'LL EAT YOU ALL AT THE DANCE SAID ME (obviously the word is lead, but I always have a wee snigger every time I hear it sung) :-)

The cross eyed bear reminds me of what my father told me about a classmate who was called Abel Lever. How sweet the name of Jesus sounds in abel lever's ear made them all giggle apparently.
Then there is always the Lord's Prayer: Our father which art in Devon, Harold be thy name..... Lead us not into Thames station !

And DD2 said ramoon instead of maroon.
Isn't it funny how sometimes the "invented" word actually seems harder than the real word?

My brother was a voracious reader very early on, and often read words he understood from the context, but had never heard pronounced.

One I remember well is, 'I know it was you and you needn't denny it!'

But the best was probably 'the Rock of Gribble-ater'.

We still call Gribble-ater.

cerejals - cereals (aged 2)

My dd asked if my mum had been evaporated during the war!

You're right, Newquay, an example that comes to mind was 2 children of a friend, who each had a word for "binoculars", nocklacutors and bonconkulars!

can't remember any childish ones, but MIL always said chimley and skelingtons, it gave me a quiet laugh!

We have just stayed in a ho-tail with our grandchildren.

My favourite from my daughter was the line from the three witches "Hubble bubble toilet trouble." Very appropriIate.

Just to explain it was a misheard line from a Manfred Mann song.

Just remembered a couple more. Quite a few years ago when there was a water shortage,my then 6 year old DD asked what a 'hose pipe band' was (hose pipe ban). And she said she had been to a 'jungle sale' with her nanna at the local church.

" Two Injured Swans" by the Saw Doctors.

youtu.be/0ver0lMNMgw

And I liked the " Reverend Blue Jeans" by Neil Diamond.

youtu.be/iGn8TVp3Xig

DGD recently took part in a dance show where one of the numbers was 'Why do fools fall in love' - she thought it was 'Why do boobs fall in love' - god love her ??

We used to play I Spy with my little Eye Sumsink beginning with ...
according to DD1 when she was about 3.

A neighbour's child flummoxed her parents by spying 'something beginning with 'w'. When the finally gave up, she triumphantly declared, 'wadiator'.