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Do some people attract bad luck??

(15 Posts)
Katek Sat 18-Jun-16 22:45:30

I have a very dear friend who has suffered far more than her fair share of sorrow over the past 30 years. I can't be specific as it would readily identify her, but her life has been punctuated by bereavement and life threatening illnesses throughout her immediate family. She is facing yet another fight at the moment-I don't know where she gets the strength to deal with all that life throws at her. Others can sail through life, golden people untouched by any troubles. I see it even within my own family although not anywhere near the same extent. Dd2/SIL/dgs are the ones who seem to lead a charmed life whilst the other 2 have had more to deal with. Is it luck? Is there such a thing?

rosesarered Sat 18-Jun-16 23:20:42

It is luck katek but only through the randomness of chance.?

Stansgran Sun 19-Jun-16 09:48:17

I do sometimes wonder if some families have a cancer gene.

annsixty Sun 19-Jun-16 10:27:30

I seem to have attracted "bad luck" throughout my life, from my Father dying when I was 11 through numerous problems with family, still ongoing, but too difficult to talk about on here, to the present day. Of my friends I was the only one to have Breast cancer, I have two more medical things I am dealing with and my H has Alzheimer's . I have lots of friends with problems and we help each other. I also have two couples for whom the sun shines constantly with affluence, wonderful C and beautiful and talented GC.
I no longer worry about what will go wrong next because as sure as eggs is eggs something will. I also know I will probably cope as I have up to now.
Not smug, just realistic.
Out for lunch with one wife of a golden couple, she said, you really could go on the Jeremy Kyle show with all your problems. Did I hit her in the eye? I just smiled and thought of karma but it hasn't happened yet.

Greyduster Sun 19-Jun-16 10:30:18

My constant mantra is "no-one leads a charmed life; there but for the grace of God go I.....". Both my parents and one of my sisters died of cancer, and sometimes I wonder who the sword of Damocles will hang over next, and I shudder. I found out last week that my eldest niece has cancer and it has been a bitter blow to me. She is a very sweet, caring person and has always been like a second granny to our GS. For my own two children, one has had more than his fair share of emotional difficulty to deal with and the effects are only now manifesting themselves as he has just been diagnosed as suffering with depression.

harrigran Sun 19-Jun-16 13:49:32

On the side of the street where I live only one woman hasn't had cancer. My sister went to a school reunion and of the ten women she was with she was the only want not to have had cancer. Fact of life as we get older horrible things happen to us.

Nonnie1 Sun 19-Jun-16 14:47:37

I do believe you make your own 'luck' in this world. I also feel that I have had more than my share of bad times, losing my lovely sister to cancer when her children were little for one, and other things too but.. the good times far outweigh the bad.

And as for the woman who said that to annsixty.. well, she's just an ignorant and insensitive idiot who would do better to keep her opinion to herself

She's probably jealous of you anyway !

Your coping mechanisms have made you the person you are today. One day she will have to face up to something, and will probably turn to you for your strength and resiliance

Stansgran Sun 19-Jun-16 14:50:33

Harrigran I do wonder about Chernobyl and the after effects in the north east.

Jenty61 Sun 19-Jun-16 15:12:06

I dont think luck comes into it...luck is winning the lottery...bad luck is losing...despite what life throws at us we always manage to find that inner strength to fight back...life kicks me down hard but I get up and face it head on...

GandTea Sun 19-Jun-16 16:20:43

I think that true "luck" is vert rare in life. The result of a coin toss is luck, but even then you can choose not to toss it. Almost everything is a result of cause and effect. We may not have control over the cause, but the result is not luck, it is affected by other events or actions. So that means we can influence our luck for the good or bad, if only slightly.

Gary Player is reputed to have said: "Golf is a game of luck. The more I practice, the luckier I get.” (there are others that claim to have said this)

KatyK Sun 19-Jun-16 16:50:33

Some people do have a fair bit of bad luck - my family included. I get very annoyed when I hear people saying 'well you make your own luck'. My nephew died of cancer as a teenager, I don't think he made his own luck. annsixty I often wonder about 'golden' couples. We know some people like that. I often wonder if their lives are so wonderful deep down. As for the Jeremy Kyle comment - how insensitive.

BlueBelle Sun 19-Jun-16 18:19:39

I don't think we can or do make our own luck I have three children one has good luck always in the right place at the right time, opportunities always pop up when needed, he really has a charmed life my youngest child has a fairly ok life neither lucky or unlucky, but my eldest always has the poor luck, time after time, she is a very hard worker takes life seriously and is always responsible but nothing ever falls her way but difficulties, she never ever has a break it's definitely NOT her fault

GandTea Sun 19-Jun-16 18:28:09

BlueBelle "it's definitely NOT her fault" but is it actually bad luck, or the result of outside influences that she has no control over ganging up on her. Generally we have little control over our own good or bad luck, it is others or circumstances that control it.

In the case of ill health, it could be lifestyle, which may be within ones control, but it may well be down to genes etc, that are not within our control.

morethan2 Sun 19-Jun-16 21:29:57

Well I feel as if I'm attracting bad luck. On top of everything else that's happened this year it looks as if I won't be going on holiday. My suitcases are packed and in the car. My husband came limping home this evening. He can hardly walk, he never complains, he's never ill so for him to complain it's got to bad. I feel like weeping I'm so pissed off fed up sad

annsixty Mon 20-Jun-16 06:12:09

morethan2 so sorry for you and I really know how you feel. It seems like one thing after another.
You could have done with the holiday so much to help you cope.
It is gout? My S has that and last week it was in his ankle, it is very painful and he couldn't drive, he also doesn't sleep with the pain so it's a double whammy.
Will you be able to go in a few days do you think?