One gift I gave to my sons and partners this year was a bag of popcorn attached to a gift voucher for the cinema and a promise to baby sit!
Good Morning Tuesday 9th June 2026
Hearing aids called smart hearing
Sign up to Gransnet Daily
Our free daily newsletter full of hot threads, competitions and discounts
Subscribe
Can I be a little cheeky and ask what sort of gifts you give to your adult children for birthdays and Christmas? If they have a partner do you give joint or separate presents?
I am at a loss every year what to give and they always say "Nothing" when I ask them what they would like!
One gift I gave to my sons and partners this year was a bag of popcorn attached to a gift voucher for the cinema and a promise to baby sit!
We give our children-all in their 20s -a hundred pounds each unless they ask for something specific. I buy them a couple of small presents to unwrap too. We do the same for their birthdays. Three of them are students and have little money and the other two have spent all their money travelling!
We agreed some Christmas's ago to stop buying presents for everyone except the children. Instead I spend more on birthdays. It's a personal choice I guess. As a family we're not really into Christmas in a big way so it doesn't bother me.
We gave our adult children money and tree presents. Our son had £150 towards a new monitor and tree presents and our daughter had £80 cash and various presents up to about the same value as she likes to actually open gifts. This is the last year we are spoiling them like this as when my DH retires we won't be able to afford it.
D D gives us short list! Usually add a little surprise. Her D H is impossible to buy for! So it's usually a gift voucher. D G D is still little so no problem there. D S it's clothes and his fishing club subs. D H and I have an outing instead of buying presents. Sister is smellies and or clothes or wine. Don't buy much else. At work we once did secret santa and had to buy something that began with the same letter as that persons name. It was great fun!
If all else fails, cinema vouchers + babysitting for the evening is always welcome.
Should add, for elder dd's birthday last Feb I gave her sleep! To be accurate, a night for her and son in law with dinner, B and B plus a lie-in, in a nice hotel nearby, while Dh and I stayed overnight to look after Gdd, then 10 months.
Not sure we'll be up for it this year, though, since by then there will be both a 22 month old Gdd and a 7 month old Gds, who is a lovely smiley little chap, but at the moment won't take a bottle or a dummy, and is plugged into Mummy heaven knows how many times a day. And is still wanting feeds at least twice during the night...
Still, we shall see. Two months to go.
Mostly money, but this year I also bought one dd several photo frames which she'd asked for. And for other dd a goosedown kingsize duvet for her first house, although she doesn't yet have the kingsize bed to go with it - just a double left by the vendors.
For one son in law I bought some nice sheepskin slippers (he had expressed a wish for slippers). For other dd's bloke I wanted to buy something similarly nice, but he didn't apparently want or need anything special, so it was just a few 'bits'.
We often give Bluewater vouchers, our (fairly) local shopping mall. They can be used in most shops in the mall, so are very versatile!
We had the same problem this year, and didn't really want to give money as I always feel a bit like you cant be bothered to think of anything. (Although I have given money!). With three adult children with partners we went through Buyagift and bought them a gift pack that allows them a one night stay at 200 plus hotels, yurts, wigwans etc across the country, but they can take it when and where they like. And if they really dont want a night away they can trade it back in on the site against another experience. There are smaller gift packages too that cover spa sessions and cream teas. We felt it was a nice way of getting them out doing something and covers the inclusion of what may or may not be a permanent partner they have that you may or may not want to spend money on!
That was for birthdays.
CHRISTMAS
no presents for adults.
£20 present for each grandchild.
£100 for children
£50 for partners
£25 for grandchildren (or present to value of)
Indiividual presents for everyone regardless of age ,My son -in -law usually,well always, has a case of wine for every birthday and Christmas and he's always happy with it ,might need to think of something different for his 40th next year ,maybe two cases....lol
We only buy for children now Christmas and birthdays. For all Adult birthdays and Anniversaries we send or give a card with scratch cards and lottery lucky dips worth a fiver. Sometimes they have won £20 to £50!
Working in a charity shop and seeing so many useless, unwanted items in pristine condition that were "unwanted gifts" altered my mindset on presents. Presents for little ones, yes, for those adults who have everything, let them select a charity of their choice and make a donation in their name. We can then think that on Christmas Day, we have made life better for someone, somewhere and be grateful for our good fortune.
Even my local WI did a £5 Secret Santa- will be looking out for those bits and pieces in the charity shop!
Vouchers are best for my adult children and their partners. DS2 and his partner both work for the same well known retail company and if I give them vouchers, they can buy just what they want with a substantial discount. They want items for the extension they're having built in the coming year, so I don't have to even think about what to buy for them. DS1 sends me links to things DiL really wants and I duly 'click and collect'. A good Highland malt whisky is always acceptable for him. I also followed their advice about what to buy for the GC but came unstuck as DGS1 (aged 12), unbeknown to his dad, had ordered the same game I bought for him, as he thought no-one would buy it for him! DS is going to Ebay it and give him the proceeds! As for me, the family obliged with the charity donations I asked for, but also gave me stocking fillers - regrettably including several kinds of chocolate truffles which I managed to share and not eat them all myself!
Me and my siblings don't buy for each other anymore, only for the kids. We all buy for our mum (normally vouchers she asks for, makes it easier for me to send from other end of the country! ) .
We send cards for birthdays.
I don't have a SIL as daughter is single so can't help with ideas ? sorry ?
I always feel a bit lazy, but my girls tend to send me a link to something they want and I just click and order it! Then try to get something small as a surprise. We do the same for SILs. At least that way they get what they want. I'd be lost if I had to think of things myself.
Strange how we are so well off now, that we have to come up with cunning plans of how to spend our money.
I am happy not to give or receive gifts, I do for children but prefer experiences, trips out etc to stuff.
I am hoping it is a custom that will die down, if not die out, too much stuff doing the rounds as it is,
The kids love their stockings, and I buy little things to put in it during the year. The prize gift this year was a bubble machine
They also get items from their list, when I've nagged them into providing a list; money if they'd rather; but it's the stocking, total value maybe £15, that's the star.
We do Secret Santa for the adults at Christmas. We set a limit and everyone writes a list and puts it in an envelope and then we all get together for the big draw.
We always give our DS and DiL the same amount for their birthdays, usually in Amazon vouchers. their birthdays are 5 weeks apart and one year we bought them each a day at a luxury spa which meant they got to spend a restful day with each other while being pampered.
My father had very little money but he was scrupulously fair about birthday presents. If his 3 girls got a cheap bottle of wine for their birthday, then so did their husbands. One year he found leather passport covers on a market stall and well got those.
DS is into narrowboats and volunteers with the Canal and River Trust. Our gift to him was a "Love Your Stretch" contribution to the Trust where his name is added online to his favourite stretch of water - in his case Bow Locks. I know there are similar schemes available for various interests.
For birthdays I always ask what they would like. For DS it's usually book or iTunes vouchers unless he has something specific in mind. This year he is fifty so it will be something special. For DD's last birthday I took her shopping and for lunch, which was as much of a treat for me as it was for her ?. Christmas for the men is usually malt whisky and something silly - this year a limited edition mug with a picture of a certain famous landmark Sheffield relish factory on it and, inside, a bottle of said relish, which my son and son in law love! DD had commented to me that her bay tree had died, so I got her another one (nightmare wrapping that up!) plus some perfume. I do try and pick up vibes through the year, but it gets more and more difficult.
We gave DS1 and DDiL (who live in USA) magazine subscriptions for Christmas and DS2 and DGF (in UK) money at their request, also they had pyjamas to open on the day.
We buy birthday presents as couples, that is. We are all individual Santa's at Christmas.
Registering is free, easy, and means you can join the discussion, watch threads and lots more.
Register now »Already registered? Log in with:
Gransnet »Get our top conversations, latest advice, fantastic competitions, and more, straight to your inbox. Sign up to our daily newsletter here.