I`m not going to pass away

So true cherry

How about 'gone to the other side'? That opens up all sorts of adventurous possibilities, and I can think of several people 'gone before' who I sincerely hope I shan't meet there!

I am another one who does not like the many euphemisms for dying and shout at the radio and television when I hear them used.

Do you think it is only the boring old farts who make such issues about phrases or words in common usage?

I do agree ... years ago I remember being shown a picture of someone who I was told they had "lost". I was not concentrating very well but did manage not to say say that was a bit careless.

I do not want to be "lost" or to "pass on." When the time comes - hopefully not for a while longer - I will die.

Hardly the most tactful of threads, given a sister who had just passed away!

I think it makes some feel superior in some odd way, cruel way to boosts one's sense of superiority .

I really find this thread and the mocking brutal.

My two babies died, if I choose to say they passed away it would be amusing for some or cause some to scream at my post - they died .

My mum always corrects me when I say passed away - he/she has died, she hollers!! I just thought itt was a softer way of saying it instead of saying that someone is dead. I think I'll revise that now.

I hate it when people say "Sorry for your loss." .....I haven't lost anything !

When my husband died I lost my husband, best friend, lover, companion , his arms comforting me, his awful jokes which brought laughter, yes I lost so much .

I too hate 'sorry for your loss'. I also can't stand people talking about going to the 'crem' which I hear frequently. Does it make it sound better - it's the crematorium for goodness sake!

I have recently had this very conversation with eldest son............he was very anti my ever being dead and felt somehow that talking about my passying away was nicer.

I am a very big gir to pass away like some feeling faint Victorian maiden (not a maiden either by a long way) there is nothing wrong with being dead.

I have also arranged what the kids call 'mum's click and colect funeral' I don't want anybody there, no flowers, no words, no naff poetry............

And it's paid for.............

Please don't associate all coyness with Americanisms. Both "passed away" and "passed" originate with medieval Judaism, not America. It's more commonly used in the U.S. because, well, there's a much larger Jewish community there than in the U.K., and the usage spread. That said, I dislike most euphemisms as well. I really hate medical euphemisms - "bowel" instead of "colon", or "womb" instead of "uterus". You don't hear those in the States - those old terms are long gone. Is it really that hard for children to learn the proper names for body parts? "Falling pregnant" is not used in the U.S. at all, and I think that's a ridiculous term as well.

I too hate 'passed away' wherever it came from. I use it if the bereaved person does, which means I am using it more and more, and I feel it's not my place (indeed, could be unkind) to tell them what term to use!

I don't mind 'bowel' and 'womb' as these are old, plain English terms instead of the Latin.

I do understand the use of the term 'loss' which can feel quite accurate as beautifully described by Anniebach, but am careful about using it - it can be not only confusing but actually distressing for children.

I think that people say 'sorry for your loss' when they know the bereaved person but not the person who has died.
I agree with you annie
The death of those we love is a great loss.

I can cope with 'passed away,' but just saying someone has 'passed' really gets me , don't know why it just doesn't sound right. I always feel like saying passed ? passed where ? I agree with others prefering to hear or use the words died or dead .

Oh Anniebach.. I hope you have not been upset by all these comments. You have suffered so much. No matter what I think I would never correct anyone who is talking about their own "loss" or the "passing" of someone close. This has made me think that people can talk about their own experiences in whichever way helps them cope x

I don't see the problem but different people have different reactions.To me i see he passed as passing through this life and it's just analternative to saying he died.its an Americanism to say he passed but It's also easier for some than saying the death word.

I don't like euphemisms either. When I die I will die nothing else. Euphemisms are used I presume to make happenings more palatable but if the 'real' world describes what has happened then use it. Mind you I do use euphemisms for the toilet eg loo! But 'toilet' developed from a different usage too! All very confusing.

I am intrigued to know how those of you that say you will die are going to ensure that you haven't passed/passed away/passed over after your deaths?!
Personally,however family and friends choose to describe my death is OK with me.I won't be around to hear it and they will be the ones who need to find a comfortable way of describing it.

I too prefer 'died' to euphemisms , but I think it's a bit insensitive to make fun of people who do use them. If it helps them by seeming a bit less harsh, then who are we to criticise?
As to ' toilet', that too was a euphemism - a lady's toilet was doing her hair and make up originally, and even 'lavatory' meant washing I think! When I was at school we called the toilet the 'cloakroom', which is presumably where you have your cloak! We'd probably have to go back to anglo saxon times to avoid euphemisms! But 'privy' surely means private place? I tend to use 'loo' as it seems more class neutral - posh people say lavatory and look down on the word toilet!!!!!
Euphemisms for menstruation are many and varied too. When I was at school a 'period' (in itself a euphemism) was called 'the curse'!

dizzy thank you. No, I am not upset for myself , I am upset for the poster who has a thread on the death of her sister. My babies and husband died, but it angers me to read if I said I lost my husband someone would suggest looking behind a cushion .

Grief is so painful, the early stages are torture, how people choose to cope with it should be respected not mocked . Perhaps those who mock have never suffered such a dark night of the soul.

Does it matter if a family chooses a wreath spelling out a name? no it does not , would I ? no, neither would I mock those who do .

Instead of screaming dead not passed away at the tv why not , how sad .

In this towns cemetery there is a large grave stone , a marble Angel , inscribe is ' our beautiful daughter taken by Angels' it meant something to those parents, hopefully a little comfort . Would posters here say to those parents, not taken by angels she is dead , accept it.

The words we use don't make any difference to the fact that someone has died. There's nothing tactless about expressing opinions on this issue. One can prefer the expression "has died" to "has passed away" without people getting offended. No-one is being attacked; a linguistic expression is being talked about, and that's all. "Has died" is not insensitive or rude or lacking in sympathy for the bereaved. People who maintain that it is any of those things are, quite simply, wrong.

I don't care what phrases other people use; I just prefer died. I think that's all anyone in support of "died" is saying.

I've no real issue with any terms for dying, but I find myself saying I "lost" my mum, because that's exactly what has happened. She died, and I have no idea where she has gone, or if she has gone to somewhere else. As far as I'm concerned, its a huge loss.

.thatbags, nothing wrong with saying - I say died not lost or passed away. But to speak of looking behind the sofa is mocking . Perhaps I am unkind to those who have not experienced the loss death brings to the bereaved