No friends

I'm another who seems to have problem making friends. I have several people I meet on a regular basis but wouldn't call them friends - not the sort I confide in or would turn to if I needed help. In my case I think it is a lack of confidence and being shy.

I've just remembered that a lady put an advert in the local newspaper for other ladies wanting a better social life to get in touch. I was just going through a divorce so responded. Another friend came with me and she made friends with the group and is still in touch with one of them 25 years later!

I have had several years of volunteering one afternoon in a charity shop (check out the all important manager). This is a good way of making friends and being sociable with both other volunteers and customers.

I'm an only, so no siblings, fairly self sufficient. There are a handful of very good friends scattered across the country who are valued probably more than they know. We keep in contact electronically the majority of the time, meet up when we can which is getting less as health impacts. It isn't the same as having a friend round the corner. In my last area there were a few local friends made through work. Without the common ground of work and geography our lives are understandably drifting along different paths. Since moving here four years ago there are acquaintances met through voluntary work, neighbours who are friendly and helpful and I hope I am equally helpful, open and friendly to all. I do feel very lonely sometimes. GN helps. Overall though I think I'm one of those people who just aren't very good at turning acquaintances into friends. I may need lessons .

I'm another who seems to have run out of friends since I retired. It's a sad fact of life that as we get older, people we know die, or move, and circles crumble for one reason or another. DH and I are rather joined at the hip these days, and I keep saying I will join something just to have an outside interest, but I'm dragging my feet at getting round to it.

I think some of us are just good at turning acquaintances into friends and others aren't.

I moved around a lot as a child (DF was in the army) and became very good at going to a new school, new neighbourhood and being superficially sociable, but it never went further because we were always moving on to the next posting so I never acquired the skill of turning an acquaintance into a friend

I do have friends, including some dating back to school and university, but I think they were the ones who befriended me and I responded.

I think people fall into one of two groups, those good at building up social circle, like my DS & DDiL, who seem to know half the population of the town they live in and have a stream of close friends who they visit and who visit them. DD is quite the opposite. She has chosen to live alone, now works from home. Has a small group of close friends she is constantly in touch with, mainly online, and sees no need to be more social.

hildajenni; I can vouch for the fact that you're easy to get to know, and friendly ...good luck with knit and natter!

I know how you feel bettyboo22 and hildajenniJ as I don't have any real friends ether (other than the lovely virtual friends on GN). I do have a sister with whom I am quite close but she has a large circle of friends, from school, various jobs, etc. of which I am not a part. I haven't had any proper friends my entire adult life which is my own fault for having a baby at 18 and not being able to mix and socialize with people of my own age. Then due to high demand from family, work etc. I have just never found the opportunity to mix with people. I did go out occasionally with a couple of "girls" I knew but they were bosom buddies and from an entirely different financial and social bracket to me and looking back I think I was just taken along as their entertainment so they could brag about their wonderful lives, their wealth and exotic holidays etc. and having me along I was no competition and they were assured of a quiet listener. I am a member of my local WI which I thoroughly enjoy (and recommend if you have one locally) but can't say I have made any real friends that I see outside the group. It's probably me. I must give off an unfriendly sort of vibe, but really I think it's just a lack of confidence and the feeling of not being as good as the next person.

Im not sure what the answer is. Sorry I can't help but I do wish you luck in finding new friends.

Hi, I've recently joined my local U3A group in an attempt to meet new friends. I'm kicking myself that I didn't do it years ago! There are so many topics of interest that your bound to find something you like. I joined in pretty much everything at first, just to see whether I liked them. Some I did; some not so much. Some groups meet weekly; some monthly, some bi monthly. You pay a small annual fee to join and that entitles you to go to any of the groups for the year. Try it, it's opened up loads of new interests for me and I've met so many new people.

Hi Betty. I have no real friends either. I do have two sisters but they live some distance from me. I have just joined a knit and natter group in my local library in an attempt to make friends. I've lived here for fourteen years and know nobody. It's my own fault, as until I retired, I worked nightshift so wasn't around much during the day. I think that I'm easy to get to know, I'm friendly too. Let's hope that getting out and meeting other people works.