Children and Christmas

My daughter was Mary in the Nativity play and had to take her own dolly to be Jesus. Jesus was a bit too big for the crib so she stood up a pushed baby down quite hard with both hands to squeeze him into the crib. Much muffled laughter from the audience.

My daughter was one of the wise men and announced in a loud,clear voice... 'i bring Frankenstein'. She really,really did!

Apparently in 195 something I was an angel and my cousin was in the audience so I peeked through my halo calling “PeekaBoo Tommy”. Apparently the house collapsed in laughter.

Pollyperkins.
I did laugh at your post so funny ??
And yours sluttygran ?

I was an angel, publicity in local press, I fell off the bench at the back, never to be seen, end of drama career!

my 3 year old cant wait to open her lavender calendar!

I remember going to my GS nativity play some years back when he was one of the Three Kings.
My GS declared in a loud voice "I bring you Gold..." to be followed by the next King who shouted in an even louder voice "I bring you Wank-incense"
Cue...much stifled laughter and tittering from the assembled parents/grandparents all trying to keep a straight face.

We were on a bus and DS was full of the nativity play, when he turned and asked why the Virgin Mary was wearing such a big dress. I said because she had Baby Jesus under it. Cue thoughtful silence, quick scan of passengers then very grown up pointed at the woman across the aisle and said in the loudest knowledgeable voice ' bet you could get LOADS of babies under that' I still feel the blush rising as gasps of horror all round and red face of the Nun while I tried to stutter an explanation.

peaches50 I've got tears of laughter rolling down my face, DD was a Holly Tree in her Nativitynon speaking part.

Leggs, what I'd give to have those days back again, do we ever forget the smell of their little newly washed heads and the feel of that whole little hand curled round our finger? I can still feel the weight of a small head on my shoulder and see the same head buried in the bowl of custard, when the youngest used to fall asleep at the table. Feel all gooey at Christmas, have a lovely one...

I feel sure I have told this one before. However.... When DS1 was a shepherd in the playgroup Nativity play, we were in the balcony of the church, with DS2, aged almost 3. When big brother made his appearance, clutching the obligatory lamb, DS2 stood up on his seat and, in ringing tones, he yelled, 'Shut your cake hole, H!' I haven't let him forget this for the last 40-odd years!

Can’t read for laughing out loud

Years ago, my son's kindergarten class was asked to draw a picture of the Nativity. I recognized Mary, Joseph, the Baby Jesus and a camel that looked more like a horse! To the right was a row of three caped, very fancy looking wise men, all wearing crowns.

On the left corner, I couldn't help noticing a bearded fat fellow with a prominently large belly. "Is that Santa Claus?" I asked with amusement. "No!" he replied importantly, ..".Santa wasn't born yet, that's 'Round John Bergen'!"

Yes they were the best times of my life . With Gold, Frankenstein and Bert Hahahaha .

Arn,t kids just great! peaches there is nothing better than that little hand in yours and the smell of a new baby .this thread as made me feel very cheerful and nostalgic

My older daughter singing Away in a Manger sang ‘the kettle is boiling,the baby awakes!’

At Friday afternoon assembly, to which parents were invited, the teacher was talking about the Nativity story which had been read to them that day. She asked questions about the Angel giving the news to Mary and then asked, “Who can tell me what Mary did next?”, the answer being that she went to give the news to her cousin Elizabeth but an insistent hand had gone up and the reply from one of the older children was “Got herself a man miss”. I have been accused of making it up but I was there and it did happen.

Walking my daughter to school many years ago, we passed a new housing development. "Mummy", she said, "you know there is no room at the inn for baby Jesus? Well couldn't they live in one of those houses?

Away in a Manger was heard to be pronounced 'A-weighing a Major....' another alternative version.

We've had 3 Virgin Marys. DD2 in the nursery class because she had the loudest voice. DD1 in the Juniors because she had a blue dress (one I'd knitted years ago!). Not sure how GD1 got the job in Reception class. Joseph was her 'boyfriend', they were planning their wedding in real life!

What hilarious posts! A great end to a hectic day

Diction isn't usually small children's strongest suit so during many years of producing Reception nativities I got used to our Lord being called ' the baby Cheeses' !!?

My ds was one of the few children able to read in his reception class nativity so his class teacher was keen that he be the narrator. DS refused point blank to have any part at all unless he could be a mince pie! His teacher, bless her, let him :-)

We had a little boy who always sang 'Harry Hoover' for Hallelujah.
One of the funniest things that happened in a nativity was when I was a TA. A little boy did a massive wee on stage that cascaded onto the hall floor. Proceedings were stopped while I got the mop and bucket and cleaned it all up. When I finished I got a standing ovation.
The freshly clothed little boy returned and we carried on as normal ??

During the Nursery concert in the school I taught in, one King, when seeing his mother in the audience shouted to her” Mam can I have the ‘ oover out when I get ‘ome?”
He had a fixation with vacuum cleaners!