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Women in the gents!

(32 Posts)
Nonnie Sun 18-Mar-18 11:45:31

In the interval at Symphony Hall recently DH went to the loo and while he was standing there doing the necessary some girls walked in and two of them went in one of the stalls. He was too surprised to comment.

I appreciate that there may be places where the Ladies is too busy but SH does have enough to cope even at its busiest. Is this another sign of the young having to have everything instantly?

If a man had gone into the Ladies would security have been called and would he have been labelled a pervert? I think it is worse for a woman going into the gents as far more is exposed!

SpanielNanny Sun 18-Mar-18 11:58:08

I’m not sure if this is exclusively the domain of the young. I must confess, in my younger days, to nipping into the gents when the queue to the ladies was too long. I suggested this once to my dil at the theatre when the ladies were very busy and she was absolutely horrified by the suggestion. I’ve never really thought about the double standard, although I can see exactly what you mean.

Chewbacca Sun 18-Mar-18 12:00:42

I think I'd agree with you Nonnie. Did none of the men in the gents at the time say anything to the 2 girls? My OH would have been very embarrassed if he'd been "caught in the act"!

henetha Sun 18-Mar-18 12:03:42

I blushingly admit I've been guilty of this. Accidentally of course.
I once walked into the sailor's toilets on HMS Fearless.
(at Navy Days in Plymouth). I came out very fast after various comments from the sailors.
My friend Mary and I walked into the Gents at the Dover Ferry Port. Again, a fast exit was necessary!
And, more recently, I was amazed when a man walked into what I thought was the Ladies in our local Sainsbury's.
It turned out it was me that was wrong, - I was in the Gents.
Yes, I am short-sighted. And yes, I am bonkers.

Nonnie Sun 18-Mar-18 12:09:27

Yes, *henetha I understand it as a mistake, I think we have all done that but these girls clearly knew as they had to pass the men using the stalls. Not sure why they needed to go into a cubicle together!?!

Bibbity Sun 18-Mar-18 12:10:50

They may have identified as male confused

Nothing is private any more. And if your DH wanted to go into a women's toilet now he could not be challenged.

henetha Sun 18-Mar-18 12:12:26

Yes, that does seem odd, Nonnie. I wonder what they were up to?

Luckygirl Sun 18-Mar-18 12:21:33

The toilets in Europe are often unisex - no problem really. I had to laugh at one lot of toilets in France where there were two doors beside each other labelled Femmes and Hommes. In I went to find that it was the same set of loos - just two differently labelled doors!

Welshwife Sun 18-Mar-18 12:51:14

At one time it was illegal for a man to go into a ladies loo but not for a woman to go into a gents.

Fennel Sun 18-Mar-18 12:54:54

I expect it will soon be illegal to label toilets as M or F.
With all this debate about banning gender going on.

Nonnie Sun 18-Mar-18 13:12:57

Fennel maybe all loos should be cubicles and then we could all use all of them regardless of the gender we were born with or the one we have decided to become.

BlueBelle Sun 18-Mar-18 13:26:00

I must admit I ve used the gents when there’s been a queue at the ladies and not in the gents it’s been a quick run in and out
They may have been European students used to unisex loos

OldMeg Sun 18-Mar-18 13:57:43

Yes, I once led a raid on the Gents after standing in a very long, unmoving queue at the NEC. About 20 of us, of all ages.

Nonnie Sun 18-Mar-18 14:01:05

How would those of you who have used the gents feel if a man came into the ladies when you were in there?

BlueBelle Sun 18-Mar-18 14:05:17

As I said Nannie I used it when no one was in there so your question is not relevant to me usage ( I also had a lookout ?

BlueBelle Sun 18-Mar-18 14:06:31

To be honest I ve no problem with unisex toilets as long as there’s cubicals and no urinal

Cabbie21 Sun 18-Mar-18 14:09:42

Once on a European tour with my choir, we were due to sing in a cathedral. There were no toilets, but just across the square were the public loos, Ladies and Gents, unusually for Europe. We trooped over, only to discover that the Ladies were closed for repair. So one of us stood guard whilst we all used the gents.
Needless to say, although it is a mixed choir, only the ladies were desperate.

Squiffy Sun 18-Mar-18 14:10:39

Perhaps unisex loos could be designed so that cubicles were near the entrance and the urinals screened off at the back. That way everyone's modesty is preserved! I've never used one, so don't know if this is already the case.

Cabbie21 Sun 18-Mar-18 14:12:47

In another place, in UK, a large village church has recently added toilets. Why on earth have they made them male and female instead of two unisex loos? Very inconvenient, pardon the pun, when we sang in a concert there.
My church has two loos, both unisex, but one has disabled and baby changing facilities. Much more sensible and useful.

SueDonim Sun 18-Mar-18 14:17:28

If self-identification of gender is permitted, anyone will be able to use any lavatory they wish.

Women already have to deal with male-bodied 'women' using female facilities so I don't see why men can't cope with a woman in the gents.

SpanielNanny Sun 18-Mar-18 14:26:55

In all honesty nonnie, I have encouraged this. I admit the situation was slightly different, the gentleman was with his young daughter - probably only about 4 years old. He didn’t want to take her into the gents (apparently they were in quite a state) and she was very upset/scared about going in alone. They were in one cubicle and I in another, it really didn’t bother me at all.

Iam64 Sun 18-Mar-18 15:10:49

The queues at women’s toilets at events are legendary. Despite women usually being the one with an elderly mum or a child, as well as their own needs to see to. Why not use the men’s toilets? I have and no doubt will do so again.

annodomini Sun 18-Mar-18 15:27:32

At the end of a long walk, I was desperate. My OH and DSs pointed to a building and said, 'There it is' and off I went. It was only when I emerged that they grinned and revealed I'd been in the gents. The only other time was when I rushed into the loo in a Lakeland shop and didn't see the sign on the door until I came out. 'Should have gone to Specsavers'.

grumppa Sun 18-Mar-18 15:40:49

The queues in ladies' loos are sufficient justification for women to appropriate the cubicles in the gents.' There is no such justification for men to invade the ladies'. I would be very suspicious of the motives of members of my sex (I don't do gender) who did.

Granny23 Sun 18-Mar-18 15:41:41

I led the charge at the BBC when we were recording '100 Women'. It was the practice to record two episodes back to back with a 10 minute 'comfort break' in the middle. So, 10 minutes for 100 women to have a tea/coffee and biscuit and go to the toilet. Not a man in sight, but still some women felt they had to stand in the long queue at the ladies - just could not bring themselves to use the queue free gents.