Sorry but I am so sad

Oh Annie I’m so sorry to hear of this, on top of everything else. But as for “moaning” I don’t see it that way at all. You are just telling us what is happening. Sixty miles isn’t too far (not for young people!) so I’m sure they’ll visit often. I know it’s not the same as having them nearby ... We’re all thinking of you and sending positive thoughts (and prayers from those of us who do).

The are moving within the UK not to the other side of the world! One, you say, is moving about 60miles, not exactly a great distance. Maybe you should look forward to having the time to indulge in a hobby or pastime of your own. Time to let them grow and develop their own ways of living, and for you to have your own life again.

60 miles and no car in Mid Wales can be a little difficult, more so when I can’t get to the end of the garden path . They are 18 and 21, their mother died last November , one can say they are a little vunerable, the younger is moving 60 miles north , her university is 50 miles south

So sorry for you, I do understand. I have a bad situation myself. I have two daughters. One is in Greece one in Australia. I’ve just lost my husband after nearly 30 years of marriage & I’m alone & very lonely.

I’ve just re fixed my password because I never get any response on this site. Maybe it will work now.

Anniebach it is a testament to your loving care that these precious girls are ready to move on and begin a new phase in their lives. You will ALWAYS be the biggest constant in their lives and they will always love you for it.

Many of us go through what you are experiencing
Do you have any interests?Although this will not stop you missing what you had but make it more bearable.

Veda, do you have your settings to notify you if anybody comments on a post? I sometimes only have a chance to look at the trending posts and those I am notified of so I might miss a new post easily. I suspect others are the same and no snub is intended.

I am feeling this with you... my eldest is leaving the country to live with his gf. He’s done the uni thing gone away lived away but moved b@ck to the neighborhood. My others live nearby one still at home, but leaving the country is bittersweet, I’m happy for him but know in my heart of hearts that he is going properly this time and won’t be around I’m actually feeling bereft and having not to show to the rest of my familyxx

Thank you all x . Veda I am sorry you are grieving .

I feel guilty now, as sarahell said, many have experienced the same , selfish of me . I will be ok x

You are not selfish Anniebach and you have absolutely no need to feel guilty for being sad and lonely.

Our only son moved 200 miles away so I understand your unhappiness. I never expected it. It's been emotional, especially when our grand daughter was born and I still feel sad some days but we have learned to carry on with our own lives and to enjoy the visits. Facetime is wonderful and I look forward to the weekly contact. You will not be excluded it's just a different world now and people no longer move 'up the road' they go much futher away.

Make it a glass half full situation and relish the solitude.

Time for your self and time to draw breath in these rush, rush, rush times is precious and very hard to come by!

What a sad time for you. Izabella puts it so well.

Right now you probably aren't feeling like giving yourself a "well done' but you are one of the people who gave you DGD's courage to shape their lives and faith in themselves to go out into the world.

It is bitter sweet when those we helped raise to be capable, confident and independent step out into life while we stand and wave them off with both smiles and tears.

As many here have said "be extra kind to yourself". Also if you feel up to therapy at this time there can be real benefits.

May the love you gave return to you. May you have care and support for as long as needed and may you find a gentle peace in the days ahead

I wish my beloved daughter had moved 200 miles away instead of taking her life.

Those of you who were so wonderfully kind and got me through last November , perhaps you will understand why my granddaughters leaving here so soon is so difficult .

I can’t yet allow her ashes to be interred , I want us to be interred together , yes she would be interred with her father but he has been dead 43 years .

I am not making sense ,sorry

Annie I am so sorry for all of your losses. I cannot imagine how sad it must make you. You have been there to comfort your dgd when they have been through their losses too. It must be difficult to hear they are both moving away from you. I am sure they will visit you often. Cats are very good companions if are living alone and they don't need walking but are affectionate. You are not moaning at all just expressing your sadness. That is what GN is for to lend a sympathetic ear.

You don't have to make sense Annie that's what (virtual) friends are for.

I think perhaps you are thinking that you need to hurry up and make a decision about your DD's final resting place, when maybe you should be allowing yourself a lot more time to think things over. Its only been a few months and things must still be very raw for you.

Annie, I've only just seen your thread. You are such a lovely person and you have been through such a lot of loss, can't really help in anyway but send you love.

You can moan to us whenever you need to - that's what friends are for.

Annie, never have I heard you moan, you are in deep grief, please be kind to yourself, my love and prayers are sent to you x

Oh Annie you are making sense!
Still grieving and unwilling to give up ashes yet, well why should you.
Just say whatever you feel like and I bet someone here gets you and sends lots of virtual cyber hugs too I know I do.

I hope the positive and supportive posts on here are helping you. I have seen your name before but not any of your past history. Feel sad for you and you’re not moaning. You seem to have had so much sadness recently and and it is recent in the grand scheme of things. A cat ? or two if you like them of course sounds like a good idea mine are around me a lot. It’s not the same as dogs but worth thinking about. Try Cats Protection they are supportive. Above all give yourself time and keep in touch. Love and prayers to you

It's still such early days for you, Annie. This is another big change on top of the trauma you have already endured, so it's not surprising you're upset.

I think a pet would be a good idea, too. A cat is independent but good company, a house rabbit or gerbil are enjoyable. Or how about a bird of some sort?

You have every right to feel upset, and I admire the strength you have found after the tragedy of your daughter's death. You have obviously done a great job with your grandaughters, such a great job that they feel secure enough to make their own lives. On a practical basis, ask them to set up skype and make a date to chat to them, to share with them. Meanwhile, although we are virtual, we are all here, and with the odd insomniac, can offer 24 hour service

annie......boundaries and all that? your time now.

annie so sorry for more upset for you. Some of the posters on this thread are obviously trying to be kind but don't understand all you have been through.
You are not moaning just telling us what is going on in your life and many of us want to know how you are and offer whatever support we can (mine will be prayers for you as I know you will not be offended at that). I do wonder if FaceTime may be of help to you. Having the chance to chat to your DGDs and being able to see their faces at the same time may help. Do you have access to iPad or iPhone?
Thinking of you x

Dear Annie you are telling it as it is-- better out than in--
please continue posting. "This too will pass" ++