Funeral clothes

I have a black and white floral pattern skirt which comes out for every funeral, worn with a white top. I never wear the skirt at any other time, but I won't part with it as it does the job, without being gloomy.
My Mum told me that she wanted bright colours when her time came, and I told everyone, so it was a cheerful celebration of a bubbly respected lady, and I wore red which was her favourite colour.

I have my "funeral suit" of black skirt and jacket which I wear, either with a short sleeved white lightly spotted blouse or a short sleeved black and white check blouse. This has always passed muster, even when invited to a funeral where no black had been requested but not passed on to me! The outfit looks like smart office gear. By the way this suit is from a Debenhams Classic range, many years ago!

Black is respectful and also flattering. You won't look like a crow. However, a funeral is not about the attendees.

When my DF died 40 years ago he had requested "no black to be worn". As his funeral was just after New Year in Lancashire trying to find light coloured coat/jacket was difficult but we all stuck by his wishes.

I have a pair of lightweight black trousers & blouses in various colours also two light coloured summer jackets. Men often wear shirt & tie but no jacket in summer. Respectful is the way to go.

I want people to wear a least one item of red clothing at my funeral.

The wishes of a friend who recently died was that NOONE was to wear black or purple but instead something bright and colourful. It was a wonderful funeral that really celebrated her life.
This was not the first time bright clothes have been suggested. The family of another friend some time ago said the same and I must say initially I felt awkward about wearing something bright - but it lifted the occasion to a positive level.
I'd like something similar for my funeral. Although sad I believe it should be a celebration of life.

I wore navy blue at an elderly aunts funeral last month. I felt it was respectful.

I always wear all black for a funeral, for me, it’s a mark of respect. I have winter black clothes and summer black clothes. I don’t think it matters if others choose not wear black, it’s just my personal choice. So I would say wear whatever you feel is right for the occasion, whether that is all black, other muted colours (brown/navy) or something more colourful such as has been suggested, ie dark skirt or trousers and pale top.
I don’t really like vibrant colours for a funeral, but I believe some people ask for mourners to wear colourful clothes. If that were the case, I’d wear a colourful scarf or pashmina over more muted clothes, I couldn’t bring myself to wear all very vibrant colours I’m afraid.

Agree with your husband. Wear what you feel comfortable in.
Its a funeral, not a fashion parade.

We’ve a very traditional family funeral to go to on Friday. I’m sorted, back and cream skirt and cream top. The men are dithering over jackets, I do feel for them, no way I’m wearing one.

I’m glad your choice of clothing was just right. I recently went to a funeral of a well known local person. The mourners all wore black, except the family. I wish they had let everyone know that colours were acceptable as we all felt a little silly.

The last funeral I went to I wore light grey trousers, a midnight blue silky blouse and a cream and blue wrap. I felt cool and comfortable.

How about cream smart trousers, and according to the weather, a navy top under either a navy jacket or navy light cardigan. This can look understated, yet smart and appropriate.

The last time I went to a funeral I was the only person wearing black and I barely knew the man. I went because the executors wanted to meet me immediately after the funeral to talk about the estate and it seemed to be assumed that I would go as I had arranged it.
As long as you are not wearing shocking pink with orange earrings you should be ok.
I agree with annep. Respectful is all that is required nowadays.

I prefer to wear navy as I look awful in black so don't own any black clothes.

I have a navy trouser suit which seems to have become my 'funeral outfit' - on a hot summer day with a crisp white shirt and navy beads (no jacket); in deepest winter same trousers with tights under, a dark jumper under the jacket and a scarf;
all.other times with smart top of subdued colour and the jacket! Sadly my fun eral suit seems to be worn fairly frequently these days.

Sounds like you got it exactly right!
I loved hearing about nannarose's attendance at the funeral of a young friend - come dressed as you knew him. Lovely idea. I'm sure it gave a lot of people a lot of pleasure remembering him and talking about him in all the places people knew him.

For anyone else worrying, I went in the end, in my mid grey trousers and a grey patterned silky top with a black jacket with me. I wore the jacket in the crem but it was far too hot so I removed it when we came out. I needn’t have worried, there was all sorts of combinations of colours, predominantly black and white or a mixture of those. No one looked wrong, no one was bothered. As others have said, navy would have been fine. There were a couple I thought took casualness too far - trousers and a t shirt such I’d wear in the house but there you are. Lots of men in just a shirt, no jacket. It’s changed, along with so much more. Thanks for your advice.

I wore all black for my mums six years ago because thats how I felt. But two funerals ago ( for want of a better phrase) I looked at myself in the mirror and all black looked so drab. I resolved never to wear all black again. As long as you look respectful it doesnt matter really nowadays.

For some funerals, mourners are instructed to wear bright clothes. One funeral we attended all the mourners were told to wear a rose, the favorite flower of the dear departed.

Without instructions, I would try to look appropriate and inconspicuous, by wearing black, grey, navy, perhaps with some white or cream or maybe a coulored scarf, but nothing flamboyant. It's not about you.

Have you anything grey or purple in your wardrobe?

I often wear black trousers and a grey jumper.

These days, navy would be a suitable colour too.

Although it isn't relevant to the original question, my favourite (sadly for a young adult we had known all his life) was "come dressed as if you were spending time with him". Some turned up in Scout uniforms, hiking gear, one friend in surf shorts. I put on ordinary clothes, and a pinny over the top (because he'd had dinner at my house very often!)
The food was "please bring what you liked to share with him".

Just something modest and not show-offy.

If you don't want to wear black, navy is a good substitute.

I went to a funeral last week where we were asked to wear bright colours, which I did, although some wore black and white. We had the same request at my DH's funeral and seems increasingly common now.

I went for all black for my mum's- but it was still very cold. At my aunt's it was warmer- black linen trousers and white linen top, but carried a jacket just in case the white was to much, it wasn't. Men just do suits don't they- so much easier.