On the Beach!

I agree with what you've said. It's one thing to take a quick call or look at messages once every couple of hours but people should not live their whole life through a phone.

So sad they are missing out on making special memories.

It’s so sad, they’re missing out on their children, and their children are missing out on them. Unfortunately it does seem to be the way of the world now. Even at concerts etc, people seem to live the whole experience through their phone screens.

I fully appreciate your point about being unfair to the majority of mums too. My dil is frequently told by strangers what a lovely mum she is, and she finds it very frustrating that they seem to assume she wouldn’t be! ‘Getting the approval of the parenting police’ is how she refers to it!

Kupari45, not on the beach, but in John Lewis cafe yesterday, at lunch time. A Dad, I presume, with his little daughter, were at the next table. She had her lunch bag, he had his coffee and his phone. Only once did I see him speak to her, and she was so well behaved, quiet, eating nicely, and no toys, electronic or otherwise, to amuse her. She did a lot if people watching. I thought it was so sad, as they could heve been having such a good time with each other.

When DS and DDiL are with DGS (as opposed to being at work) they only get their phones out to take photos or video of him!
When DDiL was pregnant I told them both, if I ever see either of them ignoring their child in favour of their phone, the phone will be forcibly removed from their hands and jumped on until it's dead!
I've not had to do it so far, (23 months) and don't ever expect to, but they know I mean it!
DH and I look after DGS three days a week, and enjoy every second of it, why can't some of these young parents see how wonderful it is watching a child grow and develop. They're little people for such a short time, and some parents are missing all the fun!

I'm with you all the way Kupari. What can be more important that chatting to your children.

Only today when walking down a fairly busy street this young Mum was pushing a buggy and a little lad, barely walking was slowly stumbling along.............he was trying to attract Mum`s attention to something he had seen,but sadly Mum was glued to her mobile..........not even chatting or replying to her young son..............plus not really watching where she,the buggy or the walking child was going.
Not only was the child missing out on the elements and building bricks of conversation,that child could easily have slipped away or even been kid napped,yet it seems the phone call was far more important.
It makes my blood boil.
This was not a one off either,it is now the norm.

Recently I was lucky enough to accompany my daughter to watch my little (then 4year old) DGS take his swimming badges.
The dads like us were willing the little ones on with clapping and thumbs up.
The mum's well you've guessed it were more interested in their mobile phones

I can't understand what they find so fascinating and important on their phones. They can't all be in the middle of big business deals.
Agreed the poor children (and their Mums) are losing out on much more important things.
But what can we do about it? TG all our grandchildren are over toddler age, but now have their own phones .

Could be ordering the supermarket shop rather than dragging the kids there?
I do know some adults spend inordinate amounts of time glued to screens! But when my kids were small and we were on holiday if I was glued to a book it was hard to distract me to look at a sandcastle!

LOL there were no mobile phones when I was growing up but our mums still found ways to ignore us while they gossiped either in person or on landlines if they had one.

Things dont change half as much as people like to make out

The dads like us were willing the little ones on with clapping and thumbs up.
The mum's well you've guessed it were more interested in their mobile phones sad

maybe you and the dads are more interested cause they only show up on badge day? and those mums get the kids to swimming week in week out all through term time so the novelty isn't there??

My children now adults and parents all,say that they remember a key factor of their childhoods being mummy with her nose buried in a book ??‍♀️

See this phone thing constantly. In play parks , even when pushing a pram. In our day babies faced their mothers pushing the pram, and there was constant interaction. Now children, more often than not, face away.

No, notanan2 The Dads take their children (to the Swim baths) just as often as the mums.
My DD and son in law
take turns and I also go when both parents are working (shifts).
Many dads are there all the time others alternate.
I have yet to see a dad on a phone.
Just my experience.

Less likely to happen on the beaches around here - there’s no signal.

Yes, but I' m glued to my phone looking at GN so I feel a hypocrite criticising them. However I am not currently looking after a child, or eating a meal or ignoring other's conversations. I am on my own drinking my after meal coffee while DH is in the garden, so perhaps I c an be let off?

I don't think we can know whether this sort of mobile phone obsession is typical of most mums. I suspect it isn't but it certainly is something I am noticing more frequently. It is truly sad to see children being ignored in favour of something far less important.

I think perhaps the point we are missing is that people are using their phones to access social networking sites such as Facebook. As a recent, quite frightening, programme on TV showed, these networks have been deliberately designed to be addictive and the psychology behind them is very much modelled on the reinforcement principles used in casinos and on internet gambling sites.

The fact is, many people are addicted to social networking sites, which they access through their mobile phones. It is a truly worrying situation but I don't have any answers as to how this creeping tyranny can be overcome.

BBbevan: See this phone thing constantly. In play parks , even when pushing a pram. In our day babies faced their mothers pushing the pram, and there was constant interaction. Now children, more often than not, face away.

My children faced away from me. There was so much more interesting stuff to watch than mum's face. It didn't stop us talking about what was going on.

There have always been parents who are less focussed on their children than would be optimum for the children. I'd prefer a world where mobiles didn't dominate so much, especially for school age children. I don't live in that world though.
I've spent more time than usual with my adult children and their friends recently and can report that my observation is they do not spend all day on their phones ignoring their children. I walk my dogs at our local park and other open spaces, where I meet lots of young people who are engaged with their children, rather than watching their phones.
I do feel we can become very judgemental and critical of young parents and it would do us good to remember some of the cold, critical and grumpy older people who criticised our parenting at every opportunity.

Quite so Iam I agree

It’s a bit like rowdy children - we notice them but not those who are behaving well.

to be fair, kids are demanding.

they could have spent the day together talking to their kids and you have just seen a tiny bit. parents deserve a break too!
years ago children were seen and not heard and now they take over the show!

I live in London and I have seen a woman talking on a phone, looking down, push a toddler in a pushchair straight off the pavement and into the road without looking either way for traffic. Scary!!