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I Hate "The Wife"

(32 Posts)
Rufus2 Thu 06-Sep-18 11:27:45

An expression that irritates is often used at my local lawn bowls club, "the wife", as if she's an inanimate object; much as I would refer to "the lawn-mower", "the car".
Vera would have killed me if ever she heard that, with it's connotations of "housewife"etc.
What's wrong with the given name? Much friendlier; and safer! grin

Rufus2 Fri 07-Sep-18 13:56:26

I'm surprised nobody has confessed to using nicknames, for indoors use of course. wink
Vera was a tall, slim lady all her life, but on the spur of the moment I once came out with "Jumbo". I won't regale you with the circumstances, but before I could run she said "I like that" and it stuck! Phew! grin

Juggernaut Fri 07-Sep-18 10:10:08

DH would never call me 'the wife' and I'd never call him 'the husband'!
We both use abbreviations of our given names, so we're 'S****’ and C****'.
We use all sorts of names for each other though;
I'm 'She who must be obeyed', 'Anwen' (and when you've done this, do that, and when that's done....), 'Wench' (get to the kitchen Wench).
DH is called 'My first husband', 'Galley Slave', 'James' (home James, and don't spare the horses), 'Dids' (short for Diddums, DS's pet name for DH).
Life's too short to get uppity about what our partners call us, as long as it's done in jest, he can call me anything!

Granny23 Fri 07-Sep-18 09:17:02

In a different context, I resolutely hang on to the title Wife rather than Carer. If I were merely The Carer, I would have run away long ago.

harrigran Fri 07-Sep-18 09:02:04

There are worse things to say, it is common to hear "our lass" here in the NE. I long to ask who they share her with.

Craicon Fri 07-Sep-18 08:48:05

Nothing wrong with hubby, hubs, hubster whatever. I actually think it sounds nicer than DH.

PamelaJ1 Fri 07-Sep-18 08:33:12

Bikergran- just read your post to my DH.
His response- they are braver men than me?. He’s still giggling.

Rufus2 Fri 07-Sep-18 08:20:47

referred to our husbands as "the husband", I wonder how they would like it?
Mapleleaf: I certainly wouldn't! I'd immediately begin to worry as to how many others has she got, tucked away somewhere? shock
Mind you, if she said "chubby hubby", I might feel more confident she was referring only to me, but then it would come back to trust. grin

lemongrove Thu 06-Sep-18 22:40:53

NanKate love that one.grin

I hate 'the wife' too and am not keen on 'hubby' …. not sure why, it's like 'kiddies' another pet hate of mine.grin

Wheniwasyourage Thu 06-Sep-18 22:20:45

Slightly off topic, did anyone else notice that when the BBC were reporting the sad death of the British couple in Egypt recently, they kept referring to "John Cooper and his wife Susan"? Other media - channel 4 news for example - said "John and Susan Cooper", which I thought was much more respectful.

I hate "hubby" too. It sounds to me as very belittling of the man involved.

NanKate Thu 06-Sep-18 21:34:24

I used to love it when Terry Wogan referred to his wife as the present Mrs Wogan.

Diana54 Thu 06-Sep-18 21:07:22

After correcting my DH a few times when he was overheard he did call me Diana, it's all part of the married men's culture to say "her indoors or the wife" but if he had ever called me "the bag" there would have been a very swift and painfull response, in company or not.
I don't see the problem in " how's hubby" it's just short for "how is your husband" - because she can't remember his name.

HootyMcOwlface Thu 06-Sep-18 20:49:41

‘The wife’ doesn’t irritate me half as much as ‘hubby’, that is like nails down a blackboard!

glammanana Thu 06-Sep-18 20:40:44

I just wonder if "hubby" is a northern endearment as it is used quite often here.

Jalima1108 Thu 06-Sep-18 20:03:34

The wife!! Her indoors!! grrr

I do dislike the word 'hubby', a friend always asks 'and how's hubby?'

bikergran Thu 06-Sep-18 19:51:27

One thing that really really irritates me when I am at work at the checkout serving.!!

We have to ask "would you like a bag"?

answer from the males !!! no I have one here !!!

and points to the wife/partner etc grrrrrrrrrrr........!

GillT57 Thu 06-Sep-18 19:08:41

Hate 'the wife' and 'hubby'. Also dislike silly expression like 'better half'. Why not just use their name?

GrandmaMoira Thu 06-Sep-18 19:03:04

My brother's wife is "the boss". I think it's okay saying "the" in this case.

Marthjolly1 Thu 06-Sep-18 18:19:09

Absolutely hate it. The wife, the ironing board, the hoover, the dish washer etc. 'The wife' has no personality as she is an object

TerriBull Thu 06-Sep-18 18:11:55

I think most women hate it, it's insulting, the term might as well be referring to an inanimate object rather than a person.

callgirl1 Thu 06-Sep-18 17:51:47

I didn`t use to mind "my wife", but hate hearing the wife.

Hellosunshine Thu 06-Sep-18 17:33:00

I would just like a hubby! Only joking.
In this neck of the woods some men refer to their wives as "wor lass". Not usually in hearing distance of their wives though!

boheminan Thu 06-Sep-18 16:53:44

that wasn't a dig at you glammanana - posts crossedsmile

paddyann Thu 06-Sep-18 15:04:34

I hate hubby too ,thought I would be the only one .My OH would never call me the wife ,at least not within my hearing distance ,its a horrible expression.

Mapleleaf Thu 06-Sep-18 14:46:18

I agree with you, Rufus2. Makes us ladies sound like a possession, doesn't it? If we referred to our husbands as "the husband", I wonder how they would like it? ?

kittylester Thu 06-Sep-18 14:44:32

The argument for using 'the' instead of 'my' is that we don't belong to our husbands.

I would hate it though and DH refers to me as 'my wife Kitty'.

I hate 'hubby' too. Sorry, glam. I don't know why I don't like it.