Eating out but not talking.

I thought this thread was going to be about going out with DH and sitting in silence . It’s what happens when we go out!

Each to their own I guess, I went off takeaways after a dodgy one tbh but frequently think I could make it in the time they take to deliver anyway.

Lucky sods!

Yes some people do eat out several times a week, it's part of their routine, just as others eat takeaways several times a week. Have a look at programs like eat well for less for example.

I think it is sad when people choose their phones or tablets over talking to their companions. One day that companion may not be there - I would give anything to be able again to have the long conversations I used to have with my DH - that can never happen. The emails, tweets and Facebook will always be there - the person across the table from you may not

Yeah I'm a spring chicken of 64 Lemongrove, I made no reference to the bloke in the park but whatever, I would guess he's self absorbed and doesn't know how to interact with his son, I know my kids Dad struggled with ours when they were young.If the kid could talk to you and tell you he wanted to stay and play he's just as capable of telling his mum the same. Maybe that dad was having his weekend visit with his son and has run out of ideas of what to do with him, it happens but I don't know them and wouldn't have judged. Some mothers may ignore their kids I suspect some Mothers always did and always will. It's a fact.

You are so right lemongrove not only sad but potentially dangerous when parents are concentrating on screens and not where the buggy or child is.

Do people eat out several times a week? Really? I thought everyone was meant to be ‘just about managing’ from what we read.

Flexible perhaps you are young yourself?
It’s certain to me from what I saw in the play park that the Dad who ignored his young child for almost an hour, so much so that the little chap was glued to our side and enjoyed talking and playing with us and didn’t want us to leave, was probably was even worse at home, glued to a device, if he could be like that in public.
Mothers with eyes on phones while pushing their infants in pushchairs is a commin sight, as are Mothers in cafes, ignoring their children.It’s sad!

Maybe some of the reason people are on their phones is because the canned muzak in the background is so loud that normal speech is impossible.

There are a couple of restaurants locally whose food I like but the background noise makes it a misery to eat there. I have asked for music to be turned down but it doesn't usually last long before someone cranks it up again.

Of course there will always be people eating out who aren't in the mood for talking but they are the exception. The excuse that its not a treat nowadays...means its acceptable to sit round the table at home ..everyone on phones/ tablets etc? You may as well not be together.
Will they grow up the same? Apparently the number of lonely young people is on the increase. Could this be part of the problem?
It's not just older people who think like this. My daughter and daughter in law do.
As for older people being judge and jury...I think thats a bit strong. Maybe we can just see some changes that aren't necessarily good or progress because we are older and have luved through change.
I'm not sure banning phones is feasible although it sounds good in theory.

It does seem a shame. I like technology in its place but I don't use my phone at the table when out with friends or family, other than to show them photographs. They show me their photographs too so that could be described as a group activity.

Once or twice I've had a relation in hospital and I've said to people at the table in advance that, if my phone goes, I may quickly answer it and leave the table for the conversation. However, I think that is a different situation.

I always understood meal times (dinner together) to be an important time for families to catch up with how their day had been.
Better than 'having a talk' as its more relaxed.
Perhaps that idea is outdated now.

Oh please just because in the short time you observe them looking at their phones or their ipads doesn't mean they wont have the ability to speak, converse intelligently with others. What makes you think you would have behaved differently had ipads been around in your day. I'm sure they find time to interact with their kids just as much as previous generations did it's only the means of interaction have changed. They clearly need a good nursery because their parenta are so lacking in any ability whatsoever , seriously what tosh. Those kids will grow up just as the generations before them did, things change but no one has lost the ability to talk yet, they just find their ipad or phone more engaging than whoever they are sitting with.

I think its that phones and gadgets are so absorbing that people get totally engrossed in them.
They often don't even take in the fact that someone is speaking to them.

I recently spent time with a woman who spent her time ranting about how young people cant converse.... everyone was avoiding her and I was thinking "lady, if all you have to say is to criticise young people then you are the one lacking social skills! No wonder people are looking at their phones to avoid eye contact with you!"

As for not talking in Restraunts, eating out isnt necessarily a treat/special occasion. My ex and I had several "last suppers": in the midst of a break up noone feels like cooking but you both still gotta eat!

Again during a close bereavement, noone in the family felt like cooking/shopping/(or eating anothet well intentioned sympathy caserole) so again lots of eating out but very little chat.

DH and I eat out probably more than we should & see couples of all ages who do not communicate ..some use mobiles some don't! Equally there are noisy tables too! With my brother & SiL in a lovely pub in Cowfold having dinner the other evening. We were laughing and enjoying our catch up..but got dirty looks from a couple obviously taking 'mum' out for dinner as they felt we were too noisy!

We saw a young woman walking along with a baby in a pushchair glued to her phone which she of course held in the air in front of her face- she walked right into the road and oncoming traffic- luckily she pulled back but its a disaster waiting to happen.

When people walk towards me holding their phone in the air I shout 'LOOK UP' very loudly they probably think I'm mad but duh!!!

Was waiting to pay for goods in TKM.. yesterday, behind me dear little chap aged about 18months in his pushchair on an iPad!!! Mum on her phone, store was busy so waited quite a while, no interaction between them at all, I was sad for both of them, what a waste of some lovely chat time, so FlexibleFriend I am definitely one of the older generation judge and jury, that little lad probably has very limited conversational skills, I only hope he goes to a decent nursery☹️

I don't think posters are being "judge and jury", simply stating that it is sad when people prefer to engage with their phones rather than with a real live person

No nor do I but who made the older generation judge and jury?

I don't think eating at home should be done in silence and on phones.

Eating out may be a treat for some people but youngsters tend to eat out several times a week, my son and his gf certainly do as do most of their friends so it's really no different to eating at home except someone else did the cooking. So many of you are seeing this from your own perspective and quite possibly misinterpreting what you see.

I find the rapidity with which this phenomena of people being permanently attached to their devices has escalated frightening. I’m afraid my children and their children are guilty of it, though only now that my grandson is older. It rarely happens if we are eating out - mostly because they know I frown on it - and never when we are eating at home. But the rest of the time..... My heart sinks when I see children as young as three with phones. I picked up a book from the library last week about keeping children safe on line. It terrified me.

I watched a similar scenario about 5 years ago. In this case parents, son of about 12 and a grandmother. In this case, although son and father had phones, they actually used them very little.

So all four sat there, for at least 45 minutes (at which point we had finished our meal and left) not saying a word, except when they ordered their meal, not looking at phones, just staring into blank space, with expressionless faces. It didn't look as if they had had a row, faces were not stony.

So unlike my own dear family, where getting a word in edgewise at any time is difficult and sometimes silence is to be wished for.