Children in pubs

It always used to be that children were welcome until 9pm, then it is adult time. Which I think is perfectly reasonable. However, there seems to be no etiquette now. Kids running around screaming when people are carrying glasses. Bored, tired kids being ignored by parents. We rarely took ours out in the evening, but when we did, they were expected to behave! Just basic manners! I do agree that groups of shrieking women can be just as bad. Letting us down ladies!

Children in pubs and restaurants are ok with me, as long as they behave well like Spanish and French children do. Our grandchildren bring their tablets to our family forays out, and their ear phones. Easy enough and cheap enough to do.

I recently had a meal with 2 gc & their parents in a lovely Devon gastro pub. Unusually, they were impeccably behaved! The 9 year old found the pub chess set and played with her Dad and the 6 year old played a game on DDs phone while waiting for the food. However, a 30 something couple sitting at the next table made us feel extremely uncomfortable, and I'm no prude. They sat next to each other, legs entwined, hands all over the place, kissing passionately- all we needed to complete the scene were the noises off. Eventually they left, DD commenting that they were no doubt off to find a hotel room to complete the act evening! Give me a pub full of (well behaved) kids & dogs any day ..

I recall a few years ago I was in a pub having lunch with a friend. A couple with a child (around 6 years old) came in and sat at a nearby table. The child was noisy and excited but that was fine. After the meal the child got up and started running around, ignored by parents, taking things off tables and generally being a nuisance. He came up to our table and started picking up various things. My friend turned to him and in her best school teacher voice quietly said "go away". The boy look shocked went back to his parents table and sat there for the rest of our stay!

I have found that as I have got older I have got far more tolerant of children than I ever was in my youth. I like that children can now be in pubs. When I was a child my parents used to go for a drink some weekends in Summer, and leave us three kids outside in the car park with crisps and lemonade. Imagine anyone doing that nowadays!

When my boys were young it was very hard going out as a family - I felt the disapproval like something heavy in the air every time my children spoke too loudly , fidgeted, dropped their forks etc - it was not relaxing for me and no fun for them. What a contrast to England, it was in Italy! You could relax there with your kids - it was lovely. We also used to book holidays at places specifically geared for children - it made our time there much more enjoyable.

I quite envy today's parents - their children can go into pubs with them, be welcomed in restaurants and cafes and even have soft play areas provided for the younger ones in various places. I also find that I like seeing their vitality and energy. I don't like rudeness, but I'm glad to say I don't see much of that, if I'm honest. Since my granddaughter was born, I enjoy other people's children in a way I never did when I had my own. I suppose I've mellowed! I smile a lot at little ones, and am very happy when some lovely little girl or boy starts to chat to me on the bus. My younger self would look at me in amazement!

I think the idea of a quiet room in a pub is actually a pretty good idea, but today's pubs just seem like one open space, don't they? There aren't separate bars in most of them, like in my day. I even remember public bars with sawdust on the floor! They were going out of fashion, thankfully, by the time I was old enough to notice them, but in the past, taverns must have been very rough old places! We had saloons and the lounge bar in the Sixties. At one time you paid more for drinks in the 'posher' bar! I would not like a return to that, or to pubs being choked up with cigarette smoke, as they were when I was young, and so it was a good job, back then, that children were not allowed in.

My main issue with pubs is the often loud music and the big screen tv. I don't like either of these, and they put me off going to pubs. When on holiday we try to find pubs with 'character' - they are getting harder to find - the big screen dominates and spoils too many of them - and that is my bit of 'grump' about a night at the pub!

Children running around? Goodness....who has ever heard of such a thing?

I don’t mind it at all.
They’re family friendly places nowadays.
Everyone has an equal right to be there and nobody is more superior than the other.

If I want a quiet adults only drink then we venture more to country side, not so family friendly pubs, stay at home or go round friends.

PhiPhisnana You are right everyone has a right to be there - just as everyone has a right to enjoy an evening out without someone elses child making a nuisance of themselves. I have no objection to children being in pubs, cafes, restaurants or wherever - all I ask is that the parents monitor their behaviour and ensure they are not bothering other customers

Not a restaurant experience with a dog but a train. Last Friday travelled from Gatwick to the south coast by train. Not a guide/assistance dog of any kind was sitting on a seat! A very large German Shepherd although well behaved was firstly sitting upright then lying over the two seats. The owner was in another seat behind and opposite the dog. Couldn't think of anything other than the muck and hairs the next person using the seat would find. I am a dog lover but thought this was beyond belief.

PhiPhisnana you don’t mind children running around? My disabled mother would have fallen if I hadn’t managed to steady her when one of these little Angels knocked into her when he was literally jumping about trying to avoid one of the other little Angels. A game of tig I believe was happening between 3 children while their parents were sitting chatting away, oblivious to anything their little Angels were doing. I did go and say to their parents what had nearly happened. Not even an apology, just called the children over and told them to stay away from our table, not to sit down, just stay away from our table. The game continued beside other tables. There were considerable dirty looks and glowering from the adults towards our table. Family friendly doesNOT mean it is a playground!! However you think this is acceptable and they have an equal right to be there and we should go further out into the countryside!!
Can I ask, was it you sitting across from us??

If I want a quiet adults only drink then we venture more to country side, not so family friendly pubs

Eh?? Country pubs are bending over backwards to attract trade. Unless they're a destination poncey eatery, there's no way they'd discourage families.

and why should they merlot ? to satisfy a few old moaners/child haters?

I agree with oldwoman70 children are welcome provided parents supervise and monitor their behaviour. I have done my stint with children and grandchildren and don't expect to be bothered by other people's offspring when I am out for a relaxing meal or drink.
Regarding the difference in behaviour between British and other European children, I would point out again that our pub culture is quite different from the restaurants in France, Italy etc.

I agree with Oldwoman70. I have no problem whatsoever with children being in pubs and restaurants, provided they are at the table with their Parents and not running around the room out of control. It's not only annoying, but extremely dangerous to them and adults. Staff carrying trays of hot food and hot drinks can do without children running in and out of them, causing havoc and risking serious injury to themselves by being scalded.
Why should people stay at home or travel many miles out of their way to avoid badly behaved children and their inconsiderate parents/carers. You might be happy to do that, but why should you expect others to do the same PhiPhisnana? As you say, everyone has an equal right to be there. What they don't have is the right to cause disruption to others.

I agree with gillybob that it's nice more pubs are family friendly so that parents can their children for a meal occasionally. However, I think parents should ensure that their children are reasonably well behaved - not running around or being very noisy.