Giving money to people on the street

Jennifer Mail Reader Eccles.

Who on earth said that oldbatty?

Some posts make me wonder if the givers came over as Lady Bountiful or Margot Ledbetter types? It can be very demeaning having to accept charity even if you are in need of eg gloves or a sandwich. Why not simply ask ‘is there anything I can get you?’

Some posts are verging on virtue signalling, even though that was not intended. But that’s how it comes across. Just wondering if that comes across in some RL situations?

These migrants have flooded into our country illegally without presumably, the means to support themselves

Are you for real?

I bought a begging man a pair of gloves in Bath once. He didn't seem inordinately grateful!

I think it's shameful that in this country we can't house our needy. We're still a first world country after all.

When I went to Washington DC in the 80s I was walking around being a tourist and homeless men (always men) came and stood in front of me asking for money. This was within half a mile of the White House!

Do give to street people , sometimes money, sometimes coffee and a sandwich, and nip into somewhere for Bonios if there’s a dog. Would rather possibly give to a non genuine case than miss some one who was in dire straits.

As ever all sorts if views and opinions cropping up here but it came home to me literally today. I've been asked to invite someone overnight and for dinner tomorrow who is not someone I would normally invite.
I am afraid I hesitated for a while before agreeing. I did have to remember what Christmas is all about.
Who was it who said if Jesus came in looking for some food and a bed for the night how would we react?

It's tough. I mean you see someone out in cold and think "I must DO something." I had 2 interactions with the homeless last year and it kind of put me off doing much else. While running a charity shop we had a homeless couple in whose stuff had all been stolen. We found them warm clothes, blankets etc (free) and I felt so sorry I offered he woman half my (M & S) sandwich: "No thanks", she said, "I don't like them." Also bought a homeless guy breakfast (again told to keep the croissant as he "didnt like them.") I felt SO sorry for him in cold, said I'd go with him to council, write some letters, even fund a citizen card. We had it all sussed out, and I turned up as arranged but never saw him again (heard a week later he was living elsewhere in town.) So while I'm sure there ARE real deserving cases, I think you're safer giving to a charity.

Emmaline Do you have any evidence or statistics to back up your claim that the majority of people who beg are running some sort of scam?

Personally I don't give to any charities .. how many times have well known charity "leaders" been found defrauding the company! .. and as for street beggars .. the majority are running some sort of scam!
These days there are plenty of places where people can get help if they really need it ... IMO

I've had a hard life from when I was 16 so I know what I'm talking about. ?

My wife and I do donate to various charity causes, with Children in need being at the top of our list every year.

As for those unfortunate enough to finish up on the streets, that can have many reasons and causes. There was a program recently on one of the terrestrial channels that featured a person who had at one time been a "high flyer" in the finance industry.

In the above, he lost his job in the 2008 crash and went rapidly downhill and finished up sleeping rough within ten months. Being interviewed he was stating that no one who has not been through that will not believe how quickly such a situation can overtake any person.

If in doubt don't. I have direct debits to my choice of charities and put £1.00 in every collecting box at Tesco.

Through our kindness we make a bad situation worse

We do, Urmstongran

I remember an ex colleague teeling us ho she despaire of her 17 yr old son. He left school, refused to get a job or to thinking about training or college courses. He staye in his bedroom and went out with friends at night and got legless. He progressed to weed, then cocaine. - no one made him do it. He had a sound homelife and loving parents.

He became abusive, uncooperative and started stealing from his parents and relatives to fund his habit. My ex colleague sought counselling from him, drove him to appointments, but he preferred his drink and drugs to normality. They did everything in their power to help him. In the end he trashed their house after having his druggie girlfriend and pals stay for the weekend when they were away. They found excrement in their bed and the dogs basket and foul abuse scrawled on their framed wedding photos.

They gave up then, told him to leave and come back when he could live like a decent human being. His mother handed him cards for counselling and hostels on his way out. It broke her heart and she still wonders "Why?" Last they heard he was on the streets and begging.

Not everyone on the streets is a poor, homeless wretch. Lots of addicts bring hell to the door of their families and cannot be helped until they want to change. My ex-colleague's son is NOT a nice person. They cannot live in hostels for the same reason. They are anti-social.

It's an awful plight but I refuse to enable anyone to continue living a half life. I do help those charities that aid the homeless and make regular donations - to charity shops and food banks as well.

I totally understand that we ought not to judge what the begging person might choose to spend their donations on. Alcohol or drugs to blot out the awful bleakness of their lives. I get that. However the charities that help do advise us not to give. Through our kindness we make a bad situation worse.

That’s very good, Riverwalk.
Crisis is an excellent charity, especially at Christmas.

My son is volunteering there tomorrow. He is doing haircuts for the homeless. He used to be a hairdresser, but no longer works in that trade. He will be driving down to us tomorrow evening after he finishes there,

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it will be a very sad offshoot of that cashless system if those wonderfull buskers who have entertained so many commuters for so many years are to disappear

Something I hadn't thought of. I agree Grandad Some buskers are very talented, but I haven't seen as many on the streets of late. I rarely carry cash - just enough for the car park usually.

the horrors of " living" on the street.

Oh you take the moral high ground old batty and do your 'holier than thou' bit - even when people have witnessed for themselves frauds taking advantage of the compassionate.

There is a huge begging racket going on. It has been well documented.

However, most of us have told you we give to charities and the homeless. You 'despair' when we know most people who have commented feel pity for those in difficult circumstances.

You also say "Be it alcohol or the evil that is spice, it would take a will of steel to ignore these temptations."

Well, no it wouldn't actually, if a habit hadn't been formed.

As one who knows first hand the vileness of men who drink excessively and the misery it causes many families, I refuse to enable beggars to drink or do drugs. So it might be THEIR comfort. It gives me NO comfort knowing I am helping them continue to destroy themselves.

Go and despair at that oldbatty

Interesting stories on here about how many so called 'homeless' are anything but.

Along with the drug addicts and alcoholics we unfortunately have a large number of illegal immigrants who have set up camps here especially in London and other big cities.

These migrants have flooded into our country illegally without presumably, the means to support themselves.

What do they expect - that this country will house and feed them?

I guess they have been told that the UK is a soft touch with a generous benefits system, which unfortunately is true.

Interesting how immigration doesn't get a single mention in all the hand wringing BBC news bulletins about beggars on our streets.

I never give money to beggars - but give to charities that help the homeless. In the nearest large town to where I live there are 3 ‘homeless’ people who take it in shifts to beg outside a large shop, and even share a dog to make it more plausible.

Interesting about the people who asked for books. We were in London last week and saw a number of people sleeping out. I remarked to my daughter that, apart from all the other ghastly things about having nowhere to live, it must be really boring. This is obviously true for some. I do sometimes give to people on the street and buy the Big Issue. We both donate to charities, but even that can be problematic these days.

Grandad I think that the buskers have to get a "licence to busk" nowadays in London, and if they cannot prove they have one then they are moved on.

Good point about phasing out of cash.
There's one young woman who is always in the same place in Newcastle centre, selling the magazine. I've chatted to her a few times, she's from Romania, is married with 2 children and has where to live. But still very short financially. I've given her cash, but the last time I asked if she'd like some fruit for the children and she was really pleased. I gave her some grapes I'd just bought.

I'm with M0nica
I would rather risk giving to the occasional fraudster than not give to someone who is desperate.

The percentage of benefit fraud is something like 0.3%. To read the papers, you would think it's over fifty percent!

I'm very sorry if I gave that impression Sparkle. It is better, in my opinion to give so smallish charities who support people directly. We have several good ones here.

Thanks for clarifying that oldbatty. Happy Christmas to you.

I find that giving to those collecting in the streets or at retail stores etc has become more difficult as myself like so many no longer carry any cash. I use cards now for everything with contactless payment being so widely available and easy to use.

I often did give to those who appear to be in genuine need, but my habit of always losing money from out of my pockets has meant an end to cash for me.

In the above, I was saddened to see that while in London the week before last the number of buskers entertaining in the underground stations is drastically down, and I was told that the drop in cash being given to them had brought that about.

Do doubt our growing cashless society is the cause, but it will be a very sad offshoot of that cashless system if those wonderfull buskers who have entertained so many commuters for so many years are to disappear.