The Minister for Loneliness shares her thoughts.....

Quite! On both counts. Very patronising.

I don't actually want to go on holiday with my children and grandchildren but I would love the Panaches to be cared for properly.

Very patronising, unhelpful and I'm tempted to grumble about the money being spent on that, rather than on decent public services.

I find it exhausting going on holiday with the AC and GC!

These people definitely live on different planets ! They haven't got a clue so should keep their mouths shut until they can say something worthwhile.

I don't know what these so-called ministers get paid for at all because none of them can get their positions right.

Why would I want to b with family who only invite me because the government tell them too - how depressing?

It’s probably more to do with how her ideas have been reported/headlined. Yes, it’s patronising to imply that all grandparents should be carted round with their families (whether they want to go or not, seems to be the sub-text ), but this was only a small part of the whole.

Had the article been slanted more towards the need to consider and include isolated and lonely older people (and there are plenty of them, some of the GN forums testify to that), which is what she’s advocating, it would have come over differently.

The Minister is an ex-carer, she will “have a clue”, and she’ll have seen a lot of loneliness and family neglect.

I do not have any family- who should I go on holiday with?!!!

Fair enough Maggiemaybe. Good points.

What about those of us who don't have family? I find most people don't want to have to rely on their families for help and company, why are there not more daytime clubs and activities for older people. There may be things in cities but not if you live in a rural area.

I recently read an article by Liz Earle about places (so-called Blue Zones) where people live long and happy lives in some places on the planet. There are commonalities in these places as to how people live that include daily exercise, familial bonding and community spirit or belonging. Here's an extract:

I was met with an incredulous stare when I asked about the number of care homes for the elderly when visiting the Greek island of Ikaria: the answer being "There are none". The elderly are cared for, respected, enjoyed and revered by the younger generations.

(And 're staying active:

"Many of the nonagenarians I met lived up steep hills and had no choice but to stay active just walking home").

And here we need a "Minister for Loneliness" and for just about everything else!

My family took me on many caravan holidays which was lovely when the children were younger - pre-teens. I don't think it would work now that they have their own agendas although they are both very caring and affectionate. And, of course, I'm getting older and less inclined to join in activities and outings. A lot also depends on how well you get on with your in-laws. I've been lucky with my DiL, but now she and my son have split up which makes joint holidays impossible. Lovely memories though.

I can only say, we as a young family, had one very miserable holiday by taking my mother with us.
She was overbearing anyway all her life but two weeks away was a nightmare.
I am sure many families enjoy having Gran or Grandad with them to play with the children and contribute to the fun and activities, mine didn't.
If we didn't do what she wanted she sulked and actually , during a picnic, clutched her chest as the pain was terrible and told me her heart was weak.
I'm afraid I got her some indigestion tablets, which seemed to cure the heart att ack as she lived to 101 in very good health.
I am sorry to divert the thread but just wanted to point out all old people are not kind and loving.

I agree totally maggiemaybe and I find myself wanting to invite this ‘Minister’ to join GN so that she can experience the flip side. In the main we don’t have carers but many of us ARE carers. Seems to me that the problem is on of perception - younger well meaning people think that they know what the older generation need but as they haven’t experienced it they don’t really have a clue!

I'm probably the odd one out here when I say that I much prefer the company of younger people and the thought of joining any club etc with the elderly in mind just fills me with horror.
Apologies if I sound insulting in any way but I don't mean to be it's just the way I am.
I'm quite happy being alone, but not lonely, as I've never gone along with any trips or entertainment which was specifically for our age group.
I've always got on with younger people and being surrounded by 7 GGC I can't afford to feel anything other than " young ".

Perhaps Gransnet should invite Mim Davies to a live discussion on the practicalities of being older and how overcoming some of the practicalities can help to keep us stronger in body and spirit!

We used to do 'Three generation Holidays' at Peebles Hydro for years. It suited everyone very well. Lots for kids to do so we (middle generation) were happy and the older generation did their own thing during the day and we all met up for dinner at night. Various teas and coffees too and all enjoyed some of the activities together. You don't have to be joined at the hip on a family holiday.

I agree that many young well meaning people can come across as condescending.

There is a local charity which goes into care homes, hands out tamborines and plays music from the 30s and 40s. Whilst I don't doubt their good intentions they seem to forget that many of the people in these homes were teenagers in the 50s and 60s and just don't relate to Glenn Miller, Vera Lynn or The Andrew Sisters.

Well I do family holidays and have for the past 15 years. 4 generations of us until this year when my mum died, so down to 3. Maybe it is unusual I don't really know.
What I find completely unacceptable is this woman telling people they need to talk to their employers about arranging time to care for elderly relatives. This is the same government that has called zero hours contracts proper jobs. I can imagine someone in that position asking for time off.
"I need time to care for my elderly mum"
"I'll cut your hours then."
"But I need x amount to pay my rent."
"Not my problem. You need the money, you work the hours."
"But I need time to care for my mum."
This Minister may have been a carer but she obviously lives a very different life to most carers.

My grandchildren and daughter would be very disappointed if we didnt go on holiday with them.

The whole country isn’t on zero hours contracts !
I expect this Minister is actually trying to come up with some solutions to older age loneliness, which of course will be shot down in flames.I agree with you Maggiemaybe.

We go away with AC and GC.

Have been away with 2 AC and their wives, Daughter, partner and 4 GC. Hard at times, noisy, fun and made many fabulous memories.

Trying to sort out for this year also.

My mum and dad often came on holiday with us. My dad was particularly great at amusing the children, they were great times. And on occasion MiL came. Although we didnt really get on we did tolerate each other quite well, the children loved her. I cant wait til we get to go on holiday with my DD and GC. It's been discussed but hasnt been practical yet. A holiday home for wrinklies doesn't excite me at all. I still enjoy bopping to a good rock band.

The problem is that more women are on zero hours contracts now lemon
women make up a bigger proportion of those reporting working on “zero-hours contracts” (52%) compared with women in employment not on “zero-hours contracts” (47%)
These women will also be the people unable to pay for care for their elderly relative. Their relatives are less likely to have financial means and more likely to need family assistance. If the minister really cared about the elderly she would be looking at ways to help not dishing out impossible advice.

The advice isn’t impossible, and it’s up to everyone to decide if they should act on it or not.
There are millions of women not on zero hours contracts
It’s a mistake to become fixated on it and act as if the whole country was.
Holidays with grandparents or just more regular visiting them would go a long way.