The Minister for Loneliness shares her thoughts.....

lemongrove because you never criticise ideas from opposition MPs ???

I do think 'lonliness' is both an internal condition as well as one exacerbated by modern life.
A friend, a carer, is obviously on low income but managed to travel to her DDs for Christmas but needed to be home to work on Boxing Day evening. Sad that for two days families are not , for a variety of reasons, some solvable with political will, able to care for their own relatives at Christmas.

Exactly Lumarei and Jane10
So many people are just ready and waiting to have a go at any politician who dares say anything at all, especially if that
Politician happens to be a Conservative.

Its daily contact people need, to have social contact with someone, even for just 15 mins not a week or two away and then very little.

We regularly took my widowed Dm and mil on holiday. Once together but my mil was pretty impossible. We took her away every third year- my thinking was that as she had three children they should take turns. They didn't. We have taken dd2 and family away several times and DD1 's family we have had whole summers when parents had to work so we took the children away. We took DD1 and children to Greece at half term to introduce them to Ancient Greece . I had my doubts but it seemed to work. DD1 did treat us to a cottage in Northumberland last year and to weekends away in nice hotels for birthday presents so it is being slowly reciprocated. But I've found the holidays hard work to organise and to establish that I want to do my own thing. I'm ashrouds have no pockets person.

Brilliant article and good for Mim Davis. This threat prooves that however good and well meaning your suggestions people will try and find an angle to be OFFENDED and patronised.

I totally agree with the article. Loneliness is one of the biggest scourges of our society and is on the incrase. Whilst I may not feel lonely or want to go on holiday with my children there are millions who would like to. And nowhere in this article does it say people are forced to go along.

People feel patronised if someone suggests something they agree with but don’t want to do.

My SIL works away from home from Monday to Friday and both my sons work very long hours. All three families need as much leisure time together as they can grab. They really do not need me tagging along with them! Similarly, when I was working and bringing up young children the thought of taking my mother on holiday with us, who I never particularly got on with anyway, would have been unthinkable. It’s up to each of us as we get older to organise our lives as best we can and be grateful for whatever help our busy adult children choose to give us. I spent the last few years looking after my father, who died in March. I soon found out that because services are so stretched that as soon as it is apparent that there is a relative around there is no help offered at all. I often thought that my dad would have been better off if I hadn’t become involved in the first place.

I dont want to go on holiday with my children or grandchildren thank you very much. Perhaps I would be used as a "sitter". My holidays are MY holidays which I share with friends since my husband died and we have a great time, just do what we want to do, generally cruising.

I suppose it depends on how well or not you get on with your family - I went away once with my DD and now ex SIL and the DGC and it was awful. He booked us into a low budget French motel where the windows barely opened, there was no air conditioning and the toilets and showers were down the corridor in a block. I had the three kiddies in with me and spent most nights trotting back and forth with one of them to the toilets. There wasn't even a kettle in the room to make a hot drink - you were supposed to buy a can from the machine downstairs or wait for the in-house cafe to open in the morning if you wanted a drink. Never again - especially after being told I was being silly for going and buying a travel kettle so we could, at least, have a hot drink and make instant porridge for the kiddies.

As some others have already said a large number of older people have no families. I have noticed that a number of houses near near me have been purchased as HMO's for young adults with Learning Difficulties. They seem to have Carers living in. Why can't they do that for the older generation or aren't they worth the bother.

I was speaking to a young man who told me he was working in one of these houses and he was paid more than when he was working as a hairdresser! Perhaps this Minister should look into this?

All of these 'helpful' (i.e. patronising) suggestions are fine if your family lives nearby..! Neither of my DC lives within two hours drive - so popping over to take me to appointments, or out shopping, isn't exactly practical..!

Oh no. Adore my GC but my holiday involves a quiet Greek beach & a loaded Kindle. DH & I meet up for lunch & then spend evenings together. I love a secluded beach he prefers the pool & people around. Suits as both.

That's a brilliant idea kwest and suits everyone I should think.

Research demonstrates that one of the most precious things parents can give their children, is grandparents. Living in London I see so many nuclear families totally devoid of older family members to help children find their place in the family, and basically just to support them. The other side of the coin is that if families were less isolated, less nuclear, then there would be far less loneliness among older family members, and I personally applaud any publicity that brings to the fore the need for all generations to support each other within the family context. If that means sharing a holiday with grandparents every so often, why not? At least once each year I always had a holiday involving grandparents, and I made sure that my own children had the same pleasure. Now as a grandparent myself and with a holiday home abroad, I often have family members come and stay. These are opportunities for consolidating relationships. And where relationships are good, the grief experienced when there is a death in the family is better dealt with. My own mum in her 90s lives with us and professionals continually say that it's because she's part of a family unit that she's still alive.

I tried that ONCE. Never again! We took my dh's mother with us as a treat for her to Spain. Shewas so excited - but once wewere there she became a monster. All she did was to complain about the the resort, the hotel, the food, etc etc. She kept ringing our room incessantly and was generally annoying wherever we went or whatever we did despite including her. It was meant as a holiday for ALL of us - that was what we thought anyway.

We paid for her holiday as well and when we returned she told all her friends what a miserable time she'd had, which was very hurtful as we'd put in a great effort to include her on a family holiday.

It was a pretty upsetting experience and would not recommend it unless you all get on fabulously well, and are sure that the holiday will not change the dynamics.

From my gran's view - no I wouldn't entertain the idea of going on holiday with family at all.

Always invited to go on holiday with the family.
Son and family live close by and will always do jobs for me round the house, Dil and I regularly go shopping together!
I feel very lucky.

The time people start to separate from mainstream is when they retire

I disagree, having been retired for some years and being still very active, physically and socially. I believe it's more to do with physical and/or mental infirmity that renders us liable to loneliness, than anything else.

That and the lack of transport. I believe some rural areas suffer in this respect. Very hard on those who don't drive for whatever reason.

I think as well that many of us value peace and quiet sometimes (perhaps more than other nationalities). Although my mum loved coming on holiday with us she was always pleased to be back in her own flat with her TV and books, for some quiet time.

My parents didn't like the sort of holidays we all enjoyed when dds were young - beach, pool, water sports - so we didn't invite them to join us, although they did more than once come and stay while we were living abroad.

However after my father died we and siblings would invite my mother to join us on more adult hols with older dds. One was in fact the beach type and my mother did enjoy it, as long as she could stay in the shade and wasn't expected to get wet! We did manage to get her in a glass bottomed boat, though, which she enjoyed.

We've had a successful UK seaside family holiday with very little Gdcs and will probably do so again. Also joined dd and SiL on a Greek seaside holiday shortly before no. 2 arrived - it was nice to be able to take Gdd now and then to let them have a siesta/lie in.

However if I were very much older I can imagine that such holidays would no longer appeal.
Grandparents who are still fit and active are a rather different matter from those who are becoming less mobile/tiring more easily, not to mention preferring their home comforts.

I have posted on the other thread.

I think this suggestion is a vile ageist comment from a completely out of touch minister. Yes, there are old and lonely older people, but the majority of older people (currently defined as anyone over 50. Are fit, well, still working and busy enjoying child-free holidays.

Generalised sweeping statements like this, applying to nearly half the population, are meant as a way of avoiding addressing the real issue. All they actually do is make the minister look a fool.

Although I enjoy going on holiday with my family, I don't want to do it every year as I'm sure they don't want me and my husband joining them every year.

We rent a lovely cottage in Yorkshire for ten days every year.
Our son and our daughter complete with spouses and children join us for a long weekend at the beginning and we stay on to enjoy the peace of being just the two of us after that. It has brought our family much closer together and everyone looks forward to it. They do have their individual exotic foreign holidays as nuclear families every year but our combined break every September has been very 'bonding' for all of us.

re holidays we have been able to do a mix of on our own or with the kids. But atm we are still relatively fit and active. Might be different if we were less mobile, needed care.

It's not a two week holiday once a year with family that old people need but daily chatting with people of a similar age. Unfortunately old people are lucky to get one day a week at a day centre so that needs improving for a start. Portugal us a far poorer country yet old people have the opportunity to go to a day centre daily if they wish.
My Mum was in her 50s when my children were small and would come on holidays with us if my father had gone on location making a film. But many people now are much older when they become grandparents and maybe not want to go on holiday with the family. But I think AC keeping in regular touch with their parents would go a long way to curing some of the loneliness many elderly people feel.

All my immediate family live in another country and whilst my brother and his family do everything to keep my mother involved they have found that after a couple of hours she has had enough and wants to go home. A holiday away would probably finish her off!

I do a mixture. I go to France every year with my family ( 2 DD , 2 DG, 1 SIL)! We rent an apartment overlooking the beach. We do a lot together but when they go on long walks I stay behind( can't manage that health wise) . They are going away in the summer but I am not going with them as not my sort of holiday but hoping then to go away with best friend instead. You have to compromise if you do go away and not be selfish.