Death Doula/Soul Midwife

I used to work as a hospice nurse. I didn't meet any death doulas until recently (I'm currently teaching a palliative care course and one came as a guest speaker) but I'm not opposed to the idea.

It is true that nurses provide a lot of the care of dying people. But I don't really see it as different from a birth doula. Not to mention that unless you hire a private nurse, your nurse won't be able to spend time with you 24/7. As a nurse, I wouldn't be offended if someone hired a death doula to provide support. To me it would be no different than a family member staying with the patient.

I just looked it up and it looks rather like a cult religion.

Oh and just want to say MacMillon were wonderful with me absolutely saved my sanity, they took me through every step as dad was my first major family member to die and I have no siblings they arrange all sort of home care both items needed and in the last week a night nurse to sit with dad two nights a week while I got some rest ( well sort of rest) I can’t fault them at all It’s a shame it cpvaries so from town to town

Soul Midwife

For goodness sake - if you are religious and believe in a soul and an after-life you'd want to see a priest surely, not some woman who calls herself a 'soul midwife'.

No thank you.

Mycatisahacker
I just leaned my hand on my chin and thought oh shit, I need to find the tweezers NOW!

Oh my word with that name I d have a fit if you came to visit Death Doula summoned up a picture in my mind of a grim reaper Soul midwife sounds like some saccharin Americanism What about people who don’t believe in winged souls
Good luck sounds like valuable role, talking is always good at any time if life but maybe you can invent a better name after you ve done your training

coffins are usually left open in funeral homes here as well Farmor15 so everybody who goes to the funeral can pay their respects right up until its closed for the crematorium or burial .It was packed house for my mother so I'm glad she looked how she wanted .

I look shit alive

I will make no comment on that.

Did you ever see the film My Girl - Jamie Lee Curtis played a beautician who worked in a funeral parlour, making the deceased look their very best.

Depends where you die Gonegirl. In Ireland you might be seen by hundreds of people who call to house or funeral home where body is laid out. The come to pay their respects to deceased and sympathise with relatives and often comment on appearance of deceased? - not negatively- but in private I can imagine hairy faces might be noticed.
I’ve known a few cases where teenage grandchildren have done the nails of dead granny - might sound bizarre but they actually felt good about doing one last thing for her.

How many people do you think's gonna look at you when you've popped your clogs?!

If ever anyone tries to pluck out my facial hair when I am busy dying, I will come back and haunt them in the worst possible way

but I don't people to come along and say 'Oh! I never knew she had a hairy face, she kept that well hidden!'.

and getting rid of her "moustache"
Ooh yes, paddyann - I do want someone to do that for me, and any stray hairs on my chin. I've asked DIL, hope she remembers.

I found the Marie Curie nurses wonderful they helped us so much during OHs last weeks at home I couldn’t of done without them.
They did what I imagine a death doula might do.

Luckygirl I have heard positive things about MacMillan locally from different people. I have been given a contact for MacMillan for if/when I want to get in touch. I hope if I do feel the need for them they will turn up trumps.

I think both are ghastly

Gonegirl

God you have made me chuckle on here.

Op hope you found what you wanted and to anyone going through sad times x

Its the name that puts me off! Sounds such a pretentious name for a practical service. Surely end of life care is something to be shared by family, healthcare staff and with relevant church support.
I've known nurses to take on this role but they'd never call themselves 'death doulas'.

What a ghastly moniker ...death doula/soul midwife.
Another trendy idea dreamed up by ...who?

I had a dear Aunt who also had an unfortunate experience with a Macmillan nurse. On the one occasion she visited when DA had terminal cancer, she advised her to take paracetamol for the pain!

? Good for her paddyann.

gonegirl not a problem,she actually said she wanted to look nice for her "viewers" which caused a lot of hilarity with her and my sister ,that was also why she needed her nails done. If you'd known her you would know you didn't refuse what she wanted.Her GP said she wa sthe most carnaptious old bugger he knew ....lol

Why thank you Grandmashe43! That's very good to know.

Oh gone girl, you do me a world of good, thank you,