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Lily65 Wed 01-May-19 21:11:21

to not want traditional fairy tales used in DD's class (121 Posts)
Add message | Report Blankiefan Wed 01-May-19 20:09:26
P1 5yo DD's class are doing a range of activities around Fairyland being lost. I don't hear any chat from dd about anything challenging gender norms. For example, she tells me they are making a castle for sleeping beauty this week so the handsome Prince can come and wake her up. Obviously I've discussed the consent issue with her. This seemed to be new news...

AIBU in wanting a chat with her teacher to check on the truth and encouraging some challenge... or will I be "that parent"?

Mapleleaf Thu 02-May-19 08:49:47

There is a good balance of books in schools, but fairy stories have their place. I agree with Opal regarding political correctness in overdrive. Also, it is our responsibility, as adults, to present the balanced view in an age appropriate way, without overwhelming the child and sabotaging their enjoyment of being a child.

Elegran Thu 02-May-19 08:57:57

Counterbalance is the right word. If the balance swings right over to one side, eventually there is bound to be a counterswing the opposite way, and that goes for banning all dashing princes and all dreaming maidens, too.

There is a place for both feisty heroines and gentle princesses, and for both handsome princes and wimpy boys. Surely it is as discriminatory to frown totally on the characters who are out of fashion at the moment as it was disciminatory traditionally to over-praise them? Don't throw out the baby with the bathwater.

And I can't stand those pastel-tinted perfectly beautiful Disney princesses with their sweeping eyelashes and cute tantrums either. A different variety of stereotype?

Elegran Thu 02-May-19 09:03:04

If we are condemning fairy-tale princesses like sleeping beauty, why are we not equally condemning all the saccharine-sweet pastel-shaded watercolour cartoonsimages of children and babies on birthday cards, Facebook pages, etc etc? They have as little connection with the realities of red-faced bawling smelly infants.

KatyK Thu 02-May-19 09:26:07

Blimey. I used to love reading fairy stories to my DD and DGD. They loved them. Aren't they meant to be rubbish, fantasies, escapism?

Oldwoman70 Thu 02-May-19 09:32:18

I think most of us on GN were read fairy stories as children and I don't think any of us grew up believing that a handsome prince was coming to sweep us of our feet.

I think children are perfectly capable of knowing what is real or not. I remember my neighbour reading a scary story to his young son, I did question whether that was a good idea only for his son to speak up and say "it's only pretend".

BradfordLass72 Thu 02-May-19 10:21:44

Lullydully Who want the story of the gingerbread man who isn't eaten by the fox

My sons.
It was their very objections to this and other sad and sometimes frightening things in stories which inspired me to re-write the stories.

The old stories are so good and instantly popular with children

No, they're not. I've met many Mums who say their children were quite scared of some traditional stories.

My grandson (now almost 10) had nightmares when, at 6 and 7 he had several fairy stories read to him at school.

Films too. I remember when my younger son's school showed 'Gremlins' (1984) as an end-of-term "treat" and ten out of the 22 children were kept home because the school did not agree this was a scary movie which upset children.

Every Disney movie has something frightening or unpleasant in it and to this day my sons, who saw them only as much older children, hate everything Disney.

KatyK Thu 02-May-19 10:24:56

My DH was terrified of the witch in the original Snow White film.

goldengirl Thu 02-May-19 11:20:47

Does this include NOT going to the ballet to see Cinderella or the Sleeping Beauty either?????

Lily65 Thu 02-May-19 11:23:29

There is some interesting stuff about archetypes and fairy tales.

Mapleleaf Thu 02-May-19 12:50:12

Pantomimes would be in trouble, too! ?

KatyK Thu 02-May-19 13:04:56

I'm sure it won't be long before pantomimes are banned.

Sara65 Thu 02-May-19 13:18:02

I hope not! I love a good old politically incorrect panto!

KatyK Thu 02-May-19 13:56:43

Oh no you don't grin

Anja Thu 02-May-19 14:10:54

Then Little Red Riding Hood said, ``But Grandma,
what a lovely great big furry coat you have on.''

``That's wrong!'' cried Wolf. ``Have you forgot
To tell me what BIG TEETH I've got?
Ah well, no matter what you say,
I'm going to eat you anyway.''
The small girl smiles. One eyelid flickers.
She whips a pistol from her knickers.
She aims it at the creature's head
And bang bang bang, she shoots him dead.
A few weeks later, in the wood,
I came across Miss Riding Hood.
But what a change! No cloak of red,
No silly hood upon her head.
She said, ``Hello, and do please note
My lovely furry wolfskin coat.''

Roald Dahl, Revolting Rhymes

SisterAct Thu 02-May-19 14:25:13

Schools get blamed for a lot these days !!!

Reading to and with children both at home, nursery and school is vital. Everything in balance with a wide range of both fiction and non fiction, nursery rhymes and songs is wonderful and develops language skills rapidly. Pie Corbett (worth googling). Advocates children learning by heart and then changing the characters and endings.

We need to work together to help children experience all range of books and authors.

Fennel Thu 02-May-19 14:49:37

The funniest change I've seen are the names of Enid Blyton's Faraway Tree characters.
Originally Joe Dick and Fanny.
Changed to Jo Rick and Frannie.
and again to Jo Beth and Frannie.

GrannyGravy13 Thu 02-May-19 15:08:58

As long as parents, grandparents and in some cases older siblings are reading to our youngsters and the stories / authors are varied I really cannot see what the problem is.

I am so fed up with the "political correctness police" nannying the general public. Walt Disney has kept children amused for decades, we also read the original Grimm versions. Ronald Dahls stories can be frightening but my C and GC love them. Winnie the Pooh, Beatrix Potter are fantasy but loveable.

Are we going to ban R.L.Stein and Harry Potter as they deal with demons and witchcraft?

Shakespeare, Dickens and Tolkien will they be targeted next?

Anniebach Thu 02-May-19 15:38:37

Good grief, I didn’t expect a prince to come into my life , I never thought I was a princess .

lemongrove Thu 02-May-19 15:45:30

I shall stop my habit of kissing frogs now.grin
Don’t some of today’s mothers have more pressing things to worry about.

SpanielNanny Thu 02-May-19 15:50:35

In complete fairness, I’ve seen that post on Mumsnet and the OVERWHELMING opinion was that the op was being silly and over the top. There was a lot of comments comparing children reading fairytales to adults reading Charles Dickens, they may not be of our time, but an important part of our culture and history. Almost everybody encouraged the op to allow her child to enjoy the fairytales for what they are, as well as some lovely suggestions on more modern stories.

Summerlove Thu 02-May-19 15:57:41

Lemongrove, to many mothers teaching consent is as pressing matter. As is teaching that “boys will be boys” is not acceptable, and that girls need to stand up and be strong themselves.

Not understanding why so many (especially grandparents in my experience) have issue with that.

Just because they Do things differently and than one generation might have, doesn’t make it wrong.

Lily65 Thu 02-May-19 16:20:08

Can't the wee girl be just that without worrying about consent?

SpanielNanny Thu 02-May-19 16:24:21

Lily65 whilst I agree that the woman who started this thread is going over the top, the world is very different now. I’m a bit of a surrogate grandmother to 2 little girls who live next door. Last week the 10 year old (year 6) went to her mum in tears, because a boy had a asked her for a naked picture of herself. Unfortunately modern parents are having to tackle these things far earlier than we did.

NanaandGrampy Thu 02-May-19 16:52:46

I guess the book I have just bought my grandson - Poo in the Zoo wouldn't make the cut then ? :-)

SparklyGrandma Thu 02-May-19 16:56:16

Consent is essential to learn about from a young age, I think. Children have a right to say no.

Being swept off her feet by a Prince is a daft idea that is not real, and girls should learn something different, more real than that, I think.