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Any ideas?

(51 Posts)
BlueBelle Sun 20-Oct-19 08:05:48

My grandson (18) sleeps like the dead partly due to burning candles at both ends and partly genetic (he has an older half brother who has lost jobs through not being able to get up) He’s in no way lazy he’s a very hard working lad and at the moment he’s ok living at home as his mum gets up at silly o clock to make sure he’s up and running but he’s slept through every alarm he’s ever had even his phone alarm right next to his ear has no effect. Apart from jokey stuff like a bucket of water etc has anyone ever had to deal with this and is there any kind of alarm on the market that you ve come across that would raise these very deep slumberers

SparklyGrandma Tue 22-Oct-19 14:17:05

Two loud alarms could maybe work - not mobile phone alarms, but mechanical ones.

BlueBelle Mon 21-Oct-19 23:39:55

Thanks again we ll find something I m sure and no we won’t let him ‘lose a couple of jobs to teach him’ don’t you realise how few and far between jobs are for young people he has a career and is doing well but thanks again I think the old fashioned clocks or the vibrating ( nearly said vibrates) ones are the way to go
Thank you I m sure as some have said he is very very normal

4allweknow Mon 21-Oct-19 23:39:47

He needs an alarm like my husband has. He is hearing impaired. The alarm goes beneath his pillow and boy you cannot ignore the vibration. Look at websites for hearing impaired devices. Good luck.

JanaNana Mon 21-Oct-19 23:31:19

One of my son's was a really deep sleeper and used to sleep through it. This was many years ago when you could still buy the wind up alarm clocks with the bell on. We bought two, then stood them both in the base of an old square metal biscuit tin. The racket they made ringing, echoing in the biscuit tin was very effective and no more problems after that. If you can still buy anything similar these days it's worth trying out.

Brigidsdaughter Mon 21-Oct-19 23:11:14

I've always been dreadful in the mornings but was disciplined at getting up for work. However, waking up properly was always a struggle and it takes me a while not to feel dopey!!
I have u dear active thyroid, diagnosed 6 years ago and I'd swear that while it's that recent I was always slow to get going.
My v low Vit D and fatigue were key signs.
What about a general blood test and a Vit D3 booster anyway? It wont cure but can only help

Sweetcheek Mon 21-Oct-19 22:44:39

Hi Bluebell
I am profoundly deaf and no audible alarm on this earth would wake me up and that includes fire alarms, but I do have an alarm that vibrates which I put under my pillow inside the pillow case.
This is very efficient at waking me, you can buy them from the RNID and for a reasonable cost too. Worth a try I think

Shizam Mon 21-Oct-19 20:15:19

One of mine is like this. Impossible as a teenager. Could not move him. He’s still struggling with it at 28! Was going to buy him one of those sunrise alarms. Maybe I will. They’re quite pricey. But if they work...

Barmeyoldbat Mon 21-Oct-19 18:24:25

My son has a problem waking up in the morning, so he has started working nights and gets on fine now. I think some people are just morning people and other night people. Maybe your son is a night person.

Buffybee Mon 21-Oct-19 18:05:28

BlueBelle just to let you know that it wasn't me suggesting ADHD and going to the Doctors.
Buffy is not me! ?

grandtanteJE65 Mon 21-Oct-19 17:03:29

He sounds a completely normal teenager to me. I remember doing much the same at 18.

Leave him to it. Real, adult life will soon catch up with him and force him to hear the alarm clock.

As someone said up thread, once he has lost a couple of jobs through getting up too late, he'll learn.

Skye17 Mon 21-Oct-19 16:29:59

BlueBelle, you say your GS doesn’t wake up even if he has gone to bed early, but you also say he burns the candle at both ends. If he has a pattern of not getting enough sleep then one longer sleep won’t necessarily make a difference, but a pattern of getting enough sleep might do. It sounds like the first thing to try is going to bed every day 9 hours before the time he wants to wake up. (Teenagers need more sleep than adults. Also, as a sleep cycle is about 45 minutes long, sleeping 8 1/4 or 9 hours avoids waking up in the middle of a sleep cycle, which is harder to do.)

Joyfulnanna Mon 21-Oct-19 16:08:13

Does he dream/remember his dreams, if so he's oversleeping. If not, could be that he's going to bed on a full stomach, hence his body doesn't need to wake up for food. If he doesn't dream or go to bed full, the best way to wake up is to tea and toast. Loud alarm clocks don't always work for everyone. Also make sure he leaves his curtains open so natural light can switch on his body clock. Heavy sleepers shouldn't be told they need to grow up, the body needs the right stimulus to wake. It's better to have that naturally. Obviously, having a good 7-8 hours is the starting point. Good luck to your gs.

BlueBelle Mon 21-Oct-19 15:51:08

I think as others have said it’s a teenage boy thing and certainly not a doctor thing but thanks for all the suggestions

Anthea1948 Mon 21-Oct-19 14:55:59

That must be horrible for your GS. And difficult to understand for those that don't have that problem, I suppose. If it's a recognised condition I wonder if the gp could help? (Sorry, I haven't read all the responses, this might have already been suggested.)

BlueBelle Mon 21-Oct-19 14:51:51

Thanks for all the ideas and the positive posts I know he’s not alone by a long chalk and I also know he’s not being awkward as he gets mad at himself for not being able to do it for himself once he’s up he’s fine and has his routine and is not late for work but without his mum he would just go on and on She went away for the weekend recently and I said I d ring to make sure he was up 2 days were okand I got a text Up Nan
The third day nothing I rang a dozen times and luckily I live quite near so I went to his house let myself in and he was totally oblivious to the world as sound as a rock with his phone right by his head ?
I think I ll get one of those old fashioned heavy sleeper alarms for Christmas and see if that works
Why take him to the doctor Buffy ? He’s not ill

TrendyNannie6 Mon 21-Oct-19 14:33:22

Hahaha TommyWolf the good old days

EthelJ Mon 21-Oct-19 14:26:00

Im afraid I don't have any answers but I sympathise. My son was the same Bluebelle he had real problems sleeping at night and then just could not wake up in the morning. I used to have to wake him for school I worried a lot when he went to university and I'm not too sure how he coped, to be honest I suspect he missed a good few lectures. Now he's in his 30s he is an early riser but I'm afraid in his teens and early 20s he just could not get up. And like your GS he is certainly not lazy. Apparantly it is part of teenage boys body clocks.

TommyWolf Mon 21-Oct-19 13:58:34

My mum used to just pull the covers off grab me by the ankles and yank me out of bed. I would crash onto the floor and she would bundle up my bedding and leave the room with it. Brutal but it worked, especially with just lino on the floor. Probably very un P.C. these days.

Goingtobeagranny Mon 21-Oct-19 13:21:10

I feel your pain, my 19 year old is the same. I’ve tried all sorts but really the only thing that wakes him is me. I’m used to the comments of ‘he should wake himself up or it’s tough’ etc. I would genuinely fear for his life if there was ever a fire. Good luck x

moggie57 Mon 21-Oct-19 12:57:15

get one that chimes like big ben .then turn the volume up.

ReadyMeals Mon 21-Oct-19 12:05:57

My son has suffered from this all his life. He finds holding down a job very hard indeed and has been through so many. And with him it doesn't work even having someone to wake him as he wakes in a sort of semi-conscious state and doesn't know what's going on and can get a bit unpleasant (even if he has asked to be woken up) - then simply goes back to sleep. But then he can go several days hardly being able to sleep at all. I believe it's neurological and possibly nothing can be done. Maybe these people are best suited to work they can do in their own time at home, or writing or art or something so they can have big onslaughts at the task when able.

NotSpaghetti Mon 21-Oct-19 11:53:43

My good friend at about 18 was a “heavy sleeper” and he came to stay overnight when my parents had builders in extending the kitchen. The following morning the builders knocked out the old exterior kitchen wall. He was asleep in the room above. He didn’t notice.
He eventually came down for breakfast and was totally amazed that the wall had gone.

When he went off to university that autumn I bought him a massive wind-up alarm. The sort with two bells and a hammer. It was deafening. He told me that it did mostly wake him so long as it wasn’t next to the bed (easy to switch off). If he did sleep through it one of his flat mates would wake him because it would wake ^them up.

Last time we met he was an ordinarily-functioning adult, so don’t give up hope!
Maybe a daylight alarm and one with a hammer!

Buffy Mon 21-Oct-19 11:41:07

Have you thought about the possibility of ADHD? Has a doctor been consulted?

BBkay Mon 21-Oct-19 11:18:33

Following with interest as 15 year old grandson sleeps through any and every thing, he's also not lazy as he's held a weekend/holiday job down for over 2 years.

Mamagborg Mon 21-Oct-19 11:08:50

It’s well documented now that teenagers need more sleep and not being able to get up is not them being lazy!
This is a useful site with some helpful suggestions. Worth a look ?
www.sleepfoundation.org/articles/teens-and-sleep