Boxing Day meal with son and Partner, now say they can't afford it.

I agree with Doodle

I would pay for it all and be glad they want to come for a meal out with you.

Cough Up Granny. Don't be so tight. It's pathetic.

Totally with you on this.

Evie64

I'd change the reservation to 2 and then pop round to them afterwards with a bottle of wine? He has said he can't afford it, not that he expects you to pay. Surely they can't be offended if you have the meal without them

You would give the restaurant wine???
Why would they want that? Or do you mean for the son?

Lucky you if you have a restaurant you can afford to frequent so many times you call in "our" restaurant.
I suggest you pay for their meal and the presents, then after the holiday you all sit down and work out what you can allreally afford. You should just go to "your"restaurant one less time.

After all, Christmas Dinner is really only a roast chicken dinner with a few bits and pieces. If you all shared the food prep and the cost next year it would cost less and be more of a family affair.

Every year we take DS, DIL and GC to the pantomime for their main joint Christmas present. Every year, we then go to a restaurant for a meal. When it comes to paying the bill, DS is always involved with some kind of emergency with the children which precludes him from being anywhere near the cash desk! It's become part of the family tradition now!

Come on, treat your son to a lovely meal in the restaurant. So many Grans don't see their children from one year to the next, Be happy that he is near enough for you to treat, use your credit card to pay, The poor boy is embarrassed enough having to admit it. One day he may be in a position to treat you, HAPPY CHRISTMAS AND NEW YEAR!

Reading your first post I would think you know your son well and would know whether he was tring to get a free meal or not
I have an AC who would say "include us" in any meals out planned and when the time came would say we want to come but we can't afford it knowing we would pay so they werent left out. But eventually we realised it was just to get a free meal . They had plenty of money to go out for dinner 3 days out of 4. So the next time they tried it on we just said 'oh dear, that's a pity" and left it at that.
Glad you have decided to treat your son because I am sure you will enjoy yourselves. Merry Christmas.

Blimey, I couldn't give a **. Bung it on a credit card and enjoy.

Glad you got it sorted but I’m with BradfordLass on this. No way would I have been annoyed. Disappointed just at first.

Then I’d have immediately said ‘we’ll pay, as we are so looking forward to your company’. Then cut back elsewhere if I’d had to.

Why don't you pay for the meal but don't give the £50 present the meal can be the present

See lots of happy souls are full of Christmas cheer.

Claudiaclaws glad you got it sorted, I am BLIND and so, therefore, I must use assistive technology in order to use the computer. it's just a great shame we can't all get on with life and stop moaning, I'm not well off either but at least your eyes work and YOU will SEE your family, send me the bill

If your son has money worries it will make things worse if you sound as if the meal is more important than him.

I would give a small present and put the £50 towards the meal,

Well said B Lass, ditto from me.

Just noticed you have decided to pay. Fair enough. Ignore me.

Talk to your son. Why on earth should you consult with people you don’t know on a social media forum when you can just talk it out with him.

Or is it me? That’s what I would do. What about others?

Cut down to £30 and less gifts and tell them their meal is part of their Christmas gifts.

Happy Christmas and Boxing Day Claudia, have a wonderful meal out. Family meals are so special, you have to make the most of them.

Half my family had decamped elsewhere for Christmas, enjoy yoursleves!

Blimey the OP has updated that she is going to pay, so stop being so horrible to her

pay for the meal tell them that their present,

I would give them the presents and as a one off this year treat them to a meal.

Well said.... there are no pockets in shrouds. Let's all remember that.