WAKE - does this still mean a vigil to you?

I grew up knowing about factory shutdown holidays as Wake weeks. People talked and wrote about The Wakes.

When someone was on their deathbed, the family gathered to keep vigil, waiting for that loved one to die. Then there would be the wake - the period before the start of the funeral procession. During the wake, family members and friends had food and drink, quite often with music. After the funeral, everyone went home or back to work. That's how it was in the different countries I grew up in.

I remember as a young girl, my granny was laid out in the front room.
I was told to go and kiss her forehead.
I really didn’t want to do this as I was only five years old.
I can’t remember what we did before or after the funeral, but I’m sure there were refreshments of some sort.
Personally, I tend to call it a Wake, if I get invited to one.

I've never heard of Works Week but perhaps it was the pronunciation?

It was Wakes Week in the Potteries, anyhow.

Lemongrove, I think it was actually called 'Works Weeks' for the Yorkshire holidays when 'works' shut down for two weeks.

My mum and her church friends always called the wake, or reception, the "and afters". It is just four years since she died quite unexpectedly at the age of 92. She had a wonderful funeral and a very lovely "and afters". She would have loved it!

In my Ayrshire village the wake is before funeral and "the tea" is after. Much is set by what type of meal you provide. The norm in my family is a full 3 course meal, others may have soup and sandwiches, not many would be brave enough to just serve tea and shortbread, they would be talked about for generations to come

I am from the North and a "wake" has always been before the Funeral, the "reception" when receiving the body into Church, and after there was a "celebration of life", with stronger drinks and sandwiches.I come from a Catholic family and from a City with lots of Irish contacts.

An Irish wake was held the night before the funeral. Relations and friends took turns say the Rosary at the side of the coffin.

Those, who weren't praying, had a drink.

In Scotland where I grew up, people either lay in the bed to be viewed on the day following their death until the coffin was delivered, then they lay in it, either in their bedroom or the front room until the funeral, but I don't think the word wake was used at all.

I recall being taken, as a ten year old and with my parents, to a relatives house for what I learned was to offer our condolences for the loss of the persons husband. On arrival my parents and self were shown into a room where there was a coffin and to my horror left open and showed the persons deceased husband.I could not put a child through this.

A wake was held in the house when people tended to die at home. The person would be in an open coffin and all welcome to visit and pay their respects. Someone would stay with the coffin thru the nights and candles kept lit. The RC church frowned on the extended nature of same and introduced a 'removal' to the church where the coffin would remain until time for the funeral service. People now have the choice of attending the 'removal' usually the evening before the funeral or the funeral itself. In more recent times, due to shortage of priests, there is a 'viewing' at a funeral home and coffins go direct to the church on the morning of the funeral. I have know a relative stay in the church overnight with his mother.

A wake is more irish than english.not sure i like that word anyway.would rather have a tea party while i am alive .cant meet everyone when im dead

This is the first time I've heard of a vigil being called a wake. I thought vigils were rare nowadays but maybe more common in Catholic rural Ireland. When I was younger we associated wakes with Ireland and a big drunken party after the funeral. More recently I've heard most people refer to the get together after the funeral as a wake, especially if there are a large number of people in a pub/club/hotel. It tends not to be a wake if there are just a few people going back to the house.

the 'wake' is usually (always was), before the funeral but appears to have changed in recent times to the 'refreshments' after the funeral.

Where I live the get together after funeral is officially called the funeral tea but some people do refer to it as the wake. Like the OP I'd always thought wake was before funeral, based on Irish name for that time, in Catholic families in England, and possibly in some parts of Scotland, it was called keeping vigil. Nowadays the word wake seems to be flexible in its use.

The Maoris in NZ have theirs on the Marae and they last two or three days which gives everyone chance to make the journey home. Anyone who wishes to has the opportunity to speak about the deceased & they talk to the dead person as though they can hear - good, bad, funny tales etc. Its very healing. Everyone mucks in to feed and house those who have travelled. I attended one and it was amazing.

Wake to me (southerner) means a do after the funeral to share memories. As someone said at my dad's wake, 'He'd have loved this. Shame he missed it'

My northern, rc grandparents always referred to the event afterwards as 'the ham tea'. So I'm totally

I am from an Irish family and the vigil is watching and praying over the deceased the night before the funeral and the wake is the celebration of the life after the funeral.

I think it’s a horrid word that has lost it’s true meaning. I think ‘a gathering to remember ...’ is far more acceptable.

It is the term for either.

Never heard the term 'wake'in relation to a funeral other than in Ireland and then it was before the funeral. Always just reception after the funeral. Traditionally deception held in family home and when food was served men were seated and ate first. When they finished the women were allowed to eat! Nowadays it's a reception in a hotel or hall after the funeral.

home wake or home funeral
Me neither agnurse

I think viewings at home are more usual in the RC church, although for non RCs a private family viewing at a chapel of rest may be the norm.

Callistemom

I think this is somewhat dependent on culture and individual preference. Here in Canada I have never seen someone have a home wake or a home funeral. Usually if you wanted to have something similar to a wake (but without formal prayers), it would be called a "viewing" and you would have it at the funeral home or the church/chapel. Sometimes, for example, there might be a private family viewing or a public viewing. This is not the same as the vigil or the prayers - there's no formal program at a viewing. Sometimes a viewing can be held just prior to a vigil/prayers.