Gransnet forums


Validation for Grannies!

(19 Posts)
Gaunt47 Sat 15-Feb-20 07:53:12

The Duchess of Cambridge in a pod cast has paid tribute to her Granny, crediting her with being a very good influence. Well we all knew that grannies are exactly that, didn't we!

LullyDully Sat 15-Feb-20 07:59:56

Yes ...... Grannies rule.

absent Sat 15-Feb-20 08:39:07

Grannies have had a bad press. They have been put down for not understanding "new maths", which isn't actually new now, and just being generally old. Apparently, granny care is bad for children. I rarely do maths with my grandchildren but I do baking, for example, having been a cookery writer for nearly forty years, and we do a bit of measuring –and chemistry – in the process. We read endless stories and go to the library – something my grandchildren regard as a a great treat. I am a tremendous reader out loud and my grandchildren rejoice in it. We play games – involving counting if it's snakes and ladders (for the little ones), involving logic if it's chess (for the older ones), involving both if it's backgammon (for the bright older ones). We go swimming – and I can still swim further than any of them – but I can also match them for somersaults in the water.

My grandchildren look forward to their after -school and after pre-school and "granna days" for the little one – although not for much longer – and so do I. A grandmother who loves you is a hugely special and valuable person with a rich tapestry of life that helps provide a greater picture about life, family and who you are.

ninathenana Sat 15-Feb-20 08:48:54

absent your grandchildren are very fortunate. Your activities sound great fun with education slipped in.

Sara65 Sat 15-Feb-20 08:54:51

I think grannies play an important role, and not just in unpaid childcare.

I know all my grandchildren like coming here, I don’t bake with them, I don’t bake at all. But I’ve taken them all to story days at the library, started them in pre school gymnastics, the oldest one now does it to quite a high standard. Read endlessly to them. The house is big enough for hide and seek, and treasure hunts. In the summer we put up a big pool, and have lots of what they describe as ‘pool parties’ some weekends when they are all around I may hire a bouncy castle.

I’m always on their side, they know I think they’re wonderful, and I keep their secrets.

I wouldn’t want to be super gran seven days a week, its exhausting, but I think grandparents add another important dimension to childrens lives.

GrannyLaine Sat 15-Feb-20 09:25:02

Lovely topic for a thread Gaunt47. There has been so much on GN recently that rubbishes the positive role that grandparents can play in the life of extended families. I remember my MIL telling me that she enjoyed her grandchildren more than she enjoyed her own children and I thought it very odd at the time. She was a loving but quite strict Grandma and the children always felt very secure when they were with her. Fast forward to when my first grandchild was born and I held him in my arms for the first time, inhaling that fabulous newborn scent of him. Child of my child. It was a much stronger response than I had had when my own children were born, and suddenly, with this baby boy, my life changed forever. And now, with eight grandchildren I understand completely what my MIL was telling me

Sara65 Sat 15-Feb-20 09:44:23

I think I’m quite strict when I have to be, I will definitely tell them off when necessary, I don’t think I love them in the same way as I loved my own children, but probably enjoy them more, because for one thing you hand them back, and for another, they aren’t your responsibility, every thing is once removed, so less intense.

rafichagran Sat 15-Feb-20 16:41:59

I pick my Granson up from a very Urban school once a week now I am partially retired. The journey is 45 minutes there and the same back
I would not miss this for the world, but I am a bad Gran he gets extra screen time, he goes to the bakers with me for his choice of cake, we sit in there and I have coffee.
In the summer we go to the park, and he takes his bike or scooter. He climbs trees and told people when he was 4 he was a professional climber, it did make me laugh. When we get back he asks if he can watch a movie, of course he can.
I do not do reading as like the poster above my daughter is a journalist/writer, and she is better than me anyway. My partner, not his Granfather, helps him with maths if he asks.
I admit I do not do as much as other Grsns but we have a good time, and as he has no problems learning at school my input is not required.

suziewoozie Sat 15-Feb-20 17:07:54

When I think back to my grandmother, I just have a warm, fuzzy feeling. She couldn’t do much physically with us or provide materially but I always felt safe and loved with her during a far too tumultuous childhood. When I’m dead, I just hope that occasionally by dgs will say ‘Grandma Suzie aahh’ and have the same warm fuzzy feeling in their hearts.

DoraMarr Sat 15-Feb-20 17:15:30

Um, well, I don’t need validation from anyone else but my children and grandchildren. The fact that my daughters leave their children with me and never ask me what they have eaten, what time they went to bed etc is a vote of confidence, as is the fact that we all like spending time together and share some holidays. And, my grandchildren are completely at home in my home, and are happy to sleep over. I don’t suppose I’m more of an influence on them than I am on my own adult children, of whom I am very proud.

Calendargirl Sat 15-Feb-20 17:57:02

Never knew any of my own grandparents. My own mum was much loved by my two children, more so than my MIL, as they just didn’t really know her so well.
I hope my own grandchildren remember me fondly when I’m gone, although three of them live in Australia, so don’t know me as well as the other two ‘local’ ones.

Jane10 Sat 15-Feb-20 18:18:49

My two grannies, Gran and Granny were absolutely vital members of our family. I learned so much from both of them in different ways. The Duchess of Cambridge is spot on!

varian Sat 15-Feb-20 18:24:34

It is not my ambition to have a well attended funeral. I would quite like to be remembered by a few folk for good things I might have done, but I really hope that my grandchildren are never in any doubt about how much I love them and have many happy memories, especially of happy times at Granny's house .

Isn't that what we all want?

BradfordLass73 Sat 15-Feb-20 19:04:50

This is how my grandson sees me. I know this because he downloaded the picture and presented it to me.

I'm happy with this vision. grin

BTW I don't own a pink velvet suit and my crown is not quite so elaborate.

SirChenjin Sat 15-Feb-20 20:49:52

It depends on the granny - as with everything. Some grannies are great, others are awful and some are somewhere in the middle. Grannies are only human, after all.

AllotmentLil Sat 15-Feb-20 21:43:21

I only had one grandmother (that should tell you how I felt about her) and she was horrible. My mother was a lovely Granny. I hope my DGC know how much I love them - I tell them often enough! 😊

paddyanne Sat 15-Feb-20 21:50:53

I only had one granny too allotmentlil I loved her to the moon and back .I learned so much from her,not domestic stuff though.She was a suffragette and a staunch Labour supporter and marched for all sorts of causes.I learned about politics and life and I miss her still nearly 50 years after she died .She was a bundle of fun too ,with stories that scared the wits out of us and chasing us round the house with a wet cloth even in her 80's.I have a great relationship with my GC and I hope they have even a fraction of the happy memories of me that I have of my Granny .

BlueSapphire Sat 15-Feb-20 22:05:19

Oh DoraMarr, I quite agree with you; my sons partner (but she is DIL to me, I don't care that they're not married) has been happy to leave the two DGDs with me since they were a few months old, not give me any rules and been perfectly happy is satisfaction enough. They are now 12 and 9 yrs old and still come here in the holidays, as well as me still having younger DGD here two days a week after school.
I only really knew one of my grannies well, but she was in her late 70s when I was born, a very straight laced Victorian lady who I only ever used to see sat in a high backed chair by the fire. I remember that she complained to my mum when I started wearing a bit of make up at 15 - she must have been about 90 then. I hardly ever saw her out of her chair. But I do remember her making cakes when I was little, and she sometimes used to play cards with us.

H1954 Sat 15-Feb-20 22:12:07

I have my grandies in the school holidays, we bake, we craft, we hunt bugs in the garden, we play hairdressers, we play board games, we sew, we create, we make a mess, we weed the borders, we visit family and neighbours.........just normal stuff really 🤣🤣🤣