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Losing the plot?

(122 Posts)
Pollyj Mon 17-Feb-20 09:18:22

Can anyone offer reassurance? I am just over 60 and the last couple of days have worried I am going senile. I suffer from anxiety so maybe I am over worrying, but do any of you do things that make you wonder?

One example was this morning when I went upstairs and misheard the radio presenter say it was 8.25. 'Surely not,' I thought, it must be 7.25 but that can't be right it's definitely later than that.' So I checked the time and it was 8.05, not 25. Then my husband called up the stairs to say, 'Can the workmen come up and get started?' and I said 'but it's not 8 o'clock yet. Only half 7' - even though I'd just found out the correct time.

I did another thing the day before that set me worrying. My mother in law has just been told she has the start of dementia but she says really 'wrong' things.

Please don't say 'If you are worried, see your doctor or my anxious mind will translate that to: 'You are definitely up the creek, seek help now!'

Just wanted to know if other people did these things too?

MawB Mon 17-Feb-20 12:16:33

I stood in front of the ATM on Friday and wondered why it was not offering any options.
My card was still in my hand, but somehow I had forgotten have to put it in first.
Slippery slope?

Yennifer Mon 17-Feb-20 12:17:10

I couldn't find the phone the other day, even when I found the margerine on the side it didn't click I'd put the phone in the fridge x

Nannan2 Mon 17-Feb-20 12:19:06

I forget words when i know i know it,and i can tell you the meaning,mentioned it to neurologist,he said it could be linked to my epilepsy,which has been controlled for years,or could be caused by the tablets i take for medical conditions,and can be sorted out! See its not always a " oh im going crazy" scenario!

mauraB Mon 17-Feb-20 12:24:30

I'm with you all the way Pollyj, I fancy living 100 yrs ago, snug on a settle by the hearth, with a grandchild or a cat on my lap or having a nap, stirring a pot, dispensing wisdom, soothing hurts. I know there would be drawbacks ie going outside to a communal loo & other desperate things but not in my dream world. So, I cope, I write everything down and lose the list, need I go on? I think the whole world is going mad, except for me and thee...…….

lovebeigecardigans1955 Mon 17-Feb-20 12:31:25

Many of us are more forgetful when we are worried or stressed. I'm getting worse but I've had a lot on my mind lately. I think it's more healthy to consider that there may be a problem than to ignore it and pretend it's not happening as then you can try to do something about it.

V3ra Mon 17-Feb-20 12:32:19

SueDonim apparently screen time and computer games have the same effect on a child's brain as cocaine does on an adult's, hence why they get so addicted to it and react badly when it's withheld.
Current thinking is that children under the age of two should have no screen time at all. Such a shame to see bouncy chairs and pushchairs these days with a gadget holder ?

Craftycat Mon 17-Feb-20 12:32:43

Welcome to my world!!
This happens all the time to me & to a lot of others too.

Just laugh it off. You're not going senile- it is jusy old(er) age!!

Buttonjugs Mon 17-Feb-20 12:39:22

I could be wrong but I get the general impression from documentaries and reading that if you are worried about having dementia then you probably don’t have it. It’s usually friends and family that notice it, not the person themselves. I think. I am 56 and have issues like yours but I am stressed out and under pressure at the moment.

Tillybelle Mon 17-Feb-20 12:44:58

You sound like me Pollyj only not as bad! I have been like it all my life. I can't sort out times, and turned up half way through one of my GCE exams. I would easily say the wrong time first thing in the morning, I always wake up very muzzy. I think as we get older we need to check we are hydrated. I do forget to drink during the day. Also a bad night of poor sleep affects my brain, and most night's are bad!
I am so sorry about your MIL. You can only take this illness one day at a time and make the most of good days.
I am sure you are ok, and just like the rest of us. Stress interferes with cognition so don't be too hard on yourself. You mention workmen in the house, well, for me that is enough to send me completely round the bend! It's such an intrusion and so scary about what they are going to find and add to the bill! I'm sure they are the problem!!
I do understand how terrifying it is to think your mind is going. My mother died of Alzheimer's and now every time I can't remember a name I go into full-scale panic mode. Yet I was always bad at remembering names! - To my great embarrassment and shame.
Please try not to worry and to see the funny side!
Wishing you all the best, Elle ? (an elephant to help you!)

JaneJudge Mon 17-Feb-20 12:54:45

You say you suffer from anxiety and you are having building work done. It's most probably just stress related.

Tillybelle Mon 17-Feb-20 12:57:03

V3ra Crumbs! That is a very revealing and salutary piece information! I use my computer a lot but don't play games. I never have or shall use cocaine! Yes, addiction to computer games is not hard to imagine. It is so similar to addiction to penny-slot machines and such-like. How frightening.

MawB It was a very mean machine! It should have recognised you and despatched £5,000 in a bundle of used notes without any silly deductions from your account. That is what I believe the machine should do for me, at least.

Linipn64 Mon 17-Feb-20 12:57:37

A good way to differentiate between forgetfulness and dementia is this :
If you remember that you have forgotten your ok...if you don’t remember then ??
I was told this on a dementia course when I was a career.

Tillybelle Mon 17-Feb-20 12:59:45

Buttonjugs. Nothing to say, sorry. I just adore your name. I had to use it!

granbabies123 Mon 17-Feb-20 13:02:04

I think other people, mainly family would show concern before you realised there was an issue.
I have to check dates times, appointments all the time since leaving full time work. I forget my shopping list , main items I've gone out for but don't care. Life is to short to worry about the little things.
I believe the time to worry is when you are not aware you are forgetful and then family will realise for you.
Enjoy life.

granbabies123 Mon 17-Feb-20 13:03:22

Sorry having trouble posting today. Went on wrong post

knspol Mon 17-Feb-20 13:05:28

I think it happens to most of us and it worries most of us too. My main problem is forgetting words and names to the point where I keep out of some conversations as I worry I'll look stupid when I start fumbling for a word.

Tillybelle Mon 17-Feb-20 13:13:25

Buttonjugs. (tee hee)
Yes, usually the family notice the loss of the person's grip on things and the poor sufferer is not actually too aware of their predicament. However, I suspected that people tried to cover up their lapses in the early stages and lived through a period of great fear. I was a Neuropsychologist but retired before `i practised for very long.
I do think that Pollyj sounds ok. Fortunately she has a husband and I am sure he would step in if he saw any signs that needed attention.
It is true that early intervention can delay the progress of some common dementias by quite a lot so it's worth getting tested however frightening the though might be. It is also true that people who notice their lapses of attention usually do not have dementia.

Some drugs are associated with "mental fog" as is Fibromyalgia and ME. I'm on the drugs and have been diagnosed with ME and fibromyalgia among other things, so you can understand why I am so muddled!
Anyway, back to the topic, how do you get money out of the hole in the wall without putting your card in the machine?

Pollyj the fact that you could narrate the whole episode, remembering the times, both incorrect and correct, and what you said, indicates to me that your memory is very good and suggests you have no impairments to worry about. Getting muddled is normal and can be exacerbated by all the reasons people have given here.

SueDonim Mon 17-Feb-20 13:24:54

V3ra. shockshock That’s horrific! Thankfully, none of my five GC have any significant screen time, not even the 10yo. He gets bored with a screen after about half an hour and much prefers a book. Rather like his dad, in fact!

Rosina Mon 17-Feb-20 13:25:49

All the time, Polly! I too get anxious and stressed and then I notice how much it affects my thinking - a clear head is not possible at those times. I lose things, forget things, but when life calms down a little I feel better and think more clearly. I too have worried about dementia, but it seems that if you know you are forgetting and are aware of your less than organised behaviur there is nothing to worry about.

jocork Mon 17-Feb-20 13:27:30

Quite reassuring to hear we are all like this. I sometimes worry about forgetting peoples' names or losing a word mid sentence. It does happen more frequently as I age but I think you are all right, that recognising it is a good sign. It can be embarrassing at work as I work in a school but I just tell the students that I'm a forgetful old woman and apologise!

Nannymarg53 Mon 17-Feb-20 13:40:30

Apparently it’s not that you’ve forgotten where you’ve put your car keys but that you’ve forgotten what they’re for. So I’m ok so far ?

Ooeyisit Mon 17-Feb-20 13:42:54

It happens when you are tired or stressed ,too much on your mind . Sometimes the mind goes into overload and it sounds like you are very busy at the moment , you still have your marbles they are just busy sifting through your schedule .

Laurensnan Mon 17-Feb-20 13:45:46

Having my mum at the moment in end stage dementia and my brother in law newly diagnosed I can honestly say they never realised at first they were doing anything wrong, it was us that noticed. So if you've noticed it the chances are it's just normal memory problems that we all have as we age. The first signs we had with my mum was repeating things that she had no memory of having already said. Then she got confused how to use things ( microwave etc). I can ask my husband a couple of times over an hour what time he's going to work ( he does shifts), I just put it down to tiredness and not listening fully due to thinking other things at the same time. Anxiety also makes your brain go into hyperdrive which stops you thinking clearly. I think you're ok ?

SalsaQueen Mon 17-Feb-20 13:48:42

Pollyj I'm 60, and I do things like that. I think it's when we've got a lot to think about, or when something is going to happen - in your case, the workmen - and our usual routine is changed.

I wouldn't think you've got dementia.

cheekychops61 Mon 17-Feb-20 14:16:53

Gosh I could have written this post myself. We have just come back from holiday and put it down to a bit of jet lag as both my husband and myself seem to be mixing up words now and again. The other day while waiting for a parcel he talked about waiting for the bin man instead. Yesterday I adked him to mash the mashed potatoes???. We both know we have said the wrong thing but put it down to being retired and not as mentally active as we used to be. I'm also a great believer that some information I don't retain is because it's not really important, so easily forgotten. Again I can't always remember names, faces yes but eventually the name comes but just not as quick as it used to. I think it's just part of the aging process and anxiety also plays a part. I've been saying to my friends lately I'm not going ga ga am I.