Do we mollycoddle our children today?

I missed Barmeyoldbat's post!
I bet that made you self-sufficient though.

The first day there mum took me to the bus stop, told me to get on the bus with the other children and go into school with them. Find the head teacher and tell her I am a new girl

Gotta love that bit Barmeyoldbat‼️

Makes me feel I was actually mollycoddled myself. ??

I didn’t have the free childhood you all had I had no siblings a mum and a Dad out at work, a lovely Nan (but probably too protective now I look back) who looked after me but I only did things with her I never went off on my own I was about 14 and was given a second hand bike and then I used to go on bike rides alone That was probably my first taste of freedom no wonder I walked into a wrong relationship at 18 absolutely nothing to have learnt from
Compared to me my grandkids have had more freedom they went at 11 to High school an hour and a half bus ride away so are very competent going to other towns and finding their way around They do things I was only doing at 16

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

My parents had a small farm, down a long, winding country lane about a mile from the main road where the buses ran.

A taxi took the local children to school until they were 8, then you had to cycle the 2 miles to get there. Rain or snow, that's how we went, on one occasion one of us made a mistake, ending up in us all tumbling off our bikes.

There was a pit at the farm, and my older brother and friends made a raft out of railway sleepers, and we would 'sail' on the water - real Tom Sawyer stuff! Several times we made chips in the pit bushes.

My parents were always busy, and the world was our oyster.

This made me chuckle after reading a thread on mumsnet where the Mother was asking if it was ok to leave her 16 year old at home overnight with her 8 year old.
I was 12 when i was left overnight with my 3 nephews aged 5,3 and 1. I was in a house with no phone and the nearest relatives 11 miles away. We were fine. I was 14 when my parents went on holiday to the Med and left me, i was fine.

Yes they are, when i see all the parents dropping off their children at the school across the road from me,i think of my school journeys , walking about 3 miles to school also across fields for a short cut, scared the cows would charge at me
Also parents taking them to after school activities,i went to brownies on my own, and even on the train to relatives in Manchester about 3 hours journey on my own

I have never thought I was neglected. I did walk to primary school on my own but it was very close, in a rural village. My friends and I did ‘play out’ out at weekends (which included tree climbing etc) and returned for meals.
My mother worked from home so I was never left at home alone.
I went to boarding school aged 11 at the other end of the country. My parents took me to the station where I met other girls for the first time and travelled with them by train to school crossing London in a taxi and then getting another train. All the time I was there I travelled with this group of girls and was met by my parents at the final station. When I transferred to a local grammar school (in a new town) age 13 I crossed town by bus on my own but was shown what to do the first time. When I went to university (and also for interviews) I went by train on my own, even the first time. I don’t remember my parents ever taking me or picking me up. Not many were brought by parents in those days. All this was quite normal.

Take a look at BBC's Planet Child, very interesting to see how risk averse we've become.

I grew up with two older brothers so if mum was ever away from the house for a couple of hours my brothers were there.
I do remember on occasions my brothers would have a bit of a fight and when mum returned I would promptly tell her that my older brother started the fight and he would get a clout. Proper little tell- tale me!
Once we moved house when I was about 6 I was allowed out with other neighbourhood kids and we would all go off to the park nothing much ever happened to any of us except the usual fall over and graze a knee or elbow and generally no fighting or bullying. I do remember stroking a dog one day as back then dogs could roam freely in the streets and it nipped my hand and I ran off home screaming whereby mum took me to the hospital for a tetanus injection.
When my own children were young I was generally at home for times they would not be at school. When I done some temping work the children could go to my mum who lived just around the corner from my house, in fact they would go there anyway as they loved to be in "nannies" house because she spoilt them.
In regard of our children/grand-children that the poster asks "Do we mollycoddle them more these days" to that I will say I think we have to be much more careful in supervising and safeguarding them due to the change in so much child abuse that could happen.
One thing I will point out and perhaps some people on this thread will not like it,
is that quite some time ago I went to where my grand-children live just to call in on an unannounced visit I was able to walk through an intercom door which was broken so it was unlocked. I went to door where grand-children live and knocked but no answer so I just gave a bit of a push to the door and walked into the flat. Inside were my grand-children eldest being 6 years old and no adult there.
I do not want to elaborate on this as I cannot have myself identified. Yes my grand-children have all sorts of things and they have tablets etc; not mobile phones and many of you may think that parents do not leave children alone like that especially with doors unlocked, I am telling you a truthful account of my experience and it left me traumatised for a long time.

From the age of 10 I used to babysit for neighbours. Parents wanted to go to the cinema, a party etc. A friend of mine and I also used to ask neighbours with babies if we could take the babies out for a ride in their prams. Nobody seemed to think it was unsuitable or risky. We loved doing it, not sure what the babies thought.

Rosenoir middle-class parents stayed at home but I think working-class ones always went out to work from when the children were very small. They couldn't afford to stay at home. They also didn't have washing machines and supermarkets. They had to go from shop to shop and that took much longer, The butcher, the baker, the greengrocer, the grocer. There were laundrettes when I was a child so they'd maybe use those, which also took ages.Not usually serviced. You stayed and did the wash.

I had to walk to primary school with my younger brother I was probably about 8, mum picked us up after school. It was probably about 1.1/2 -2 miles away, but felt further with little legs!
Far more freedom in those days, don't know if they were any safer, but I think we had more confidence & common sense..
Definitely healthier as I was always out & about. Was told not to talk to strangers and if anyone was to touch me, kick them between their legs and run, as long as I arrived home in time for tea all was well!!! The good old days..

At the age of 3.5 l moved to a new house in a small close at the end of a lane with fields all around. This was the late 1960s. There was a group of children that l was allowed to play with and we played in the lane, field and barns. The "big girl" in the group was all of 7! There were a couple of disasters, such as when l fell into some stinging nettles and in a ditch, but this was quite normal for the time. My parents were strict and l assume it would have been limited time periods. My mother took me to school until l was seven and by the time l was eight l was catching the bus to the next village for my piano lessons. The one tragedy l do recall happened to the one family in the village who did mollycoddle their children, taking them to school until the age of eleven - very unusual then. The boy died suddenly of a brain haemorrhage at the age of fourteen.

I walked to school on my own after the first week, not quite five. We had to cross the main road hat connected our town with a big city.
By the time I was seven I was going to the cinema on a Saturday morning, crossing the same busy trunk road to catch a bus.
My children went to school in the next city, they had to get a bus and train and travelled on their own from eleven years old. They coped and have became very independent, travelling all over the world from thirteen.
GC get transported everywhere by car and I fear they could not cross a road safely.

trisher
We would all nigh on kill each other and I used to go around the village in a gang even at 7 years old, stealing veg from the allotments and my parents would happily eat it!!

All these reminders of my own youth, passing my 11+ exam at just 9 years old, and doing the walk to my new school at aged 10, which took me from one end of a very large park in Salford right through to the other end. I did walk with one other girl but no adults and even in the winter when it was dark at 4, we were doing that journey. Life was different then though, we went to school with just a satchel and the books for the day in, and our gym kit lingered on our pegs for a whole term without being washed. Now (living in London), I wouldn't dream of expecting my grandchildren to do that - although they do both bike it to school - society has changed and so have schools - kids are carrying heavy loads and gym kits are added to by swimming gear and musical instruments. There are far more unsavoury people on the streets, much more traffic - yes, I think the world or at least our part of it is considerably more dangerous now for children than it ever was, sadly, and I'm glad kids do have mobile phones.

Can I just ask were you all good when you were left alone?because I know we weren't.

A huge number of our friends are Swiss : one is a primary school teacher for the 10 and 11 year olds. She calls these overbearing, over-protective parents "helicopter parents" because they always seem to be hovering over their children.

Goodness where's the time go? Ive been reminiscing too long! Id best go do some 'mumsy' jobs

I remember my mum took a job,alongside my older sister at a local small sweet confectioners,once i was at school about a year,but she did part time i think,or i went next door to be looked after if she worked over,and holidays she took me with her, that would never be allowed now of course,kids in the work place! (that was when she& my dad divorced& she needed the money)but when she remarried after awhile she stayed at home again.

I think mommawolf is right,my mum said she left school at 14& went to work,so then it was seen as an age to be a young adult i suppose,even when i left school we were all 15/16- nowadays theyre expected even by government to stay in education as long as possible so they're not really seen as 'adults' till much older,its like they've an 'extended' childhood.and i guess as parents or grandparents thats how we treat them too

A lot of these were the same as my childhood.

It makes me wonder what the mothers were doing all day. They were not on social media or watching daytime TV. I realise washing would take longer than now and no dishwashers, but all day every day without an outside job and children looking after them selves what were these women doing?

I think children today are a bit mollycoddled but are also supervised more strictly. I agree this is because times seem to have changed, people are more aware of more widely publicised dangers and therefore do not allow their children the same freedoms and risks we had as children. Like many of you, my sister & I were often left at home with instructions. I was taken to infant school and collected on my first day then was expected to do the trip alone, until a couple of years later when I had to take aforementioned sister with me. My grammar school was 3, nearly 4 miles away, and I would walk both ways with bags full of books, sports equipment, musical instruments etc. We used to spend summers in the parks, the woods, the open air swimming pool, given bus fare if mum had it but usually having to walk. We were given the standard 'don't talk to strangers or accept lifts' lecture every now and then but most of the time would be packed off with a quick 'you know what to do' or ' be back by X time' or 'there's X in the fridge/cupboard for dinner' (admittedly sometimes we would only have to start preparing dinner, like picking salad from the garden or peeling veg). While I have vague memories of a few dicey moments or potentially dodgy situations for the most part I think it helped me to develop into an independent woman. With all the dubious characters that seem to inhabit today's world I can't blame parents for wanting to keep tighter reins on their children.

Yes i think maybe i was more molly coddled than some were in those days, my mum stayed at home so i didnt have to 'see to myself' in regards of being looked after,or fed or anything,and did take me to primary school& back till i was about 9,unless i came home soon with neighbours kids,and i played out with the neighbours kids so i wasn't out alone(there were a few of them) & all the neighbourhood knew each other back then so when we played we'd be in avenue mostly so everyone's mum had an eye on you. & it wasnt till we were 12/13 that we went out carol singing together (but went quite far out doing it though,)and trick or treating,or went to town at 13/14 a couple of us friends or a few together.so maybe i led a sheltered life more than some.