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How to meet men in real life?

(110 Posts)
ineedamum Sun 12-Apr-20 07:31:52

Hi, this lockdown has made me realise I want to meet a special man.

My hobbies-pre lockdown- few people my age are in.

The past year I have been on two dating websites, one I paid for and very few people used and the other is free which is dreadful. They always ask for photos!

In work (pre lockdown) I have a controlling micronmanger. If I make a joke he says "I make the jokes around here" so speaking to men in different departments and locations would be impossible! The Christmas party you have to sit with your teams.

How can I meet single men in real life?

cupcake1 Sun 12-Apr-20 13:35:33

Really??! Can’t believe the way the world is at the moment those thoughts entered your head. I know loneliness is a dreadful thing but for me personally I would never entertain the idea of these dating sites. Heard too many horror stories. Expand your horizons when this dreadful virus subsides as others have suggested.

Eleph Sun 12-Apr-20 13:28:52

Appreciate being single It has to be way better than being on lockdown with someone who is controlling and coercive!

ReadyMeals Sun 12-Apr-20 13:27:28

No don't do it! No meeting anyone outside your household. Stay at Home. Protect the NHS. Save Lives.

Juliet27 Sun 12-Apr-20 13:25:42

I'm glad I'm not the only one GardenerGran finding the slightest thing aggravating. Made me feel much better.

Chewbacca Sun 12-Apr-20 13:24:54

I've got one going spare if you want him OP? In worn, but reasonable, condition; one previous owner; full MOT provided.

vampirequeen Sun 12-Apr-20 13:20:36

I met DH on a dating site. Maybe you could try again whilst in lockdown. I liked the anonymity of the site when I first started. I didn't know how to talk to men so being online gave me a sense of control. I soon got better at it grin

EllanVannin Sun 12-Apr-20 13:16:50

Howled laughing at that, GardenerGran. grin

Elegran Sun 12-Apr-20 13:16:05

I think there is a ?Yorkshire? saying to men who are seeking their fortune - "Doant thee marry money, but go where money is". Maybe the answer to the OP is "Doant thee go looking for a man, but go where men are"

nannybaxter Sun 12-Apr-20 13:10:58

Being in lock down is a pain but at least your havent got anyone else to consider..read somewhere lawyers are going to be very busy with the amount of divorces that will be petitioned after lockdown. Me I am on a couple sites and its great just chatting and not having to get all dolled up..those that request photos other than those displayed on your profile.Just block them .

Spookwriter23 Sun 12-Apr-20 13:08:53

But they seem to want younger women than me (67)

DotMH1901 Sun 12-Apr-20 13:08:12

I tried a couple of sites but and had a couple of first meetings but one man spent the whole time telling how awful it had been for him since his wife divorced him after she discovered he was having an affair whilst she was being treated for cancer, another complained about women misrepresenting the age and a third clearly hadn't read my profile as I had clearly stated I couldn't just drop everything at a whim as I look after my grandchildren, and he was then annoyed because I said I would need to schedule weekends away etc because I had commitments. I more or less gave up after that. I am a volunteer with a local charity but the male volunteers are either all happily partnered already or not in my age group. Same thing happened in the office I worked in. I was widowed 22 years ago this year, I don't think there is another person out there for me.

Spookwriter23 Sun 12-Apr-20 13:07:53

I joined yours dating, but to get the messages I had to pay £104 95 which was for six MTHS, but because of isolation I have until next march, I also joined plenty of fish I get messages for free

Barmeyoldbat Sun 12-Apr-20 13:03:50

Mr B and I joke that if he was to be dead and gone then to get another man all I would have to do is go cycling in Wales. So many men and hardly any women my age. All very friendly.

GoldenAge Sun 12-Apr-20 13:03:31

Just a thought here - someone I know has been using a dating site and 'met' a seemingly 'nice' man just as lockdown occurred. Whilst she is desperate for the socialising ban to be lifted as they are both keen to meet physically, she realises that the current situation has given them both time to chat on a daily basis and to learn a lot more about each other. She has used these sites before and always rushed into dates that have been anything ranging from big disappointments to mildly enjoyable but nothing to count as having the potential for a relationship that she wants. Now, having had almost a month to chat to someone, not running out of things to say, still being interested, and with the prospect of this lockdown continuing, she feels like this person is much less likely to present her with unwanted surprises when she finally meets him. So why not try a dating site with this idea in mind?

GardenerGran Sun 12-Apr-20 13:01:45

I’m with Beanie on this one..just the sound of him swallowing his tea is driving me potty at the moment...

Artdecogran Sun 12-Apr-20 12:57:44

I’ve had the best, not looking at the rest!

razzmatazz Sun 12-Apr-20 12:56:09

The very last thing I want is a man. I just want to please myself and not consider anyone else. I know it's selfish but I had one wonderful man and I don't want to search for another as there isn't one .

bongobil Sun 12-Apr-20 12:54:47

Good luck with meeting your special man. I wasnt aware any still existed, glad to be single and not on lockdown with a partner lol

Welshwife Sun 12-Apr-20 12:53:43

I have no experience of these sites but know younger women in their 50s who do and they say that many men are looking for women up to 20 years younger - they would not dream of dating someone with that age gap and would prefer people of a similar age to themselves.
I agree though that it often happens when you least expect it.

nathan22699 Sun 12-Apr-20 12:51:37

Have noticed since the lockdown situation the police have been saying crime is down,stabbing are down etc,but I have noticed a lot more dog mess is not being collected up by the so called owners of animals.What are these people trying to do?Increase the spread of more germs.Unbelievable.

Granny23 Sun 12-Apr-20 12:46:44

I can't count the number of members/activists working for my political party, who have met their soulmate there and become a couple. Perhaps it is the shared interest in a cause that gives them mutual interests?

Doorstop Sun 12-Apr-20 12:45:41

Beanie654321, I am with you on that. Husband bored and argumentative, plus the 10 year age gap does not help. He is not used to being at home!

Athenia Sun 12-Apr-20 12:34:04

I have been using Guardian Soulmates, picked up on a half price offer for six months. However, so far no success. Have had to block two men for inappropriate approaches. One claimed to be an Oxford trained anaesthetist, retired, but since his reply to my nicely written message was 'Let's have hot sex together, here's my number........' I reported him for misrepresentation! I only write a very few messages to the ones that seem compatible, but have not found anyone yet. Yes I am 71, and live in hope, but there are many men of my age and older on the site. I don't feel it's appropriate to start a friendship with a much younger man, say in his fifties, but would be interested in what others think about that.

Soozikinzi Sun 12-Apr-20 12:33:17

My son met his girlfriend on bumble that seems a better than some ? The girl gets to pick and I think there’s silversingles websites ?

Aepgirl Sun 12-Apr-20 12:31:42

If lockdown wasn’t a factor at the moment, I would imagine that joining a special interest group would be quite a good way to meet like-minded people.