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Daily Challenge #12 (Mon 20 April) - make us smile with your Q&A jokes

(66 Posts)
CariGransnet (GNHQ) Mon 20-Apr-20 09:35:13

We are feeling a touch Monday morning-ish here at GNHQ, so today's challenge is to make us (and everyone) smile with your favourite jokes. To keep it simple, we are asking for short and sweet Q&A jokes (What do you call etc etc)

Very much looking forward to seeing what you come up with. As ever, will start you off with one of ours...

Q - What do you call a Frenchman wearing sandals?
A - Philippe Philoppe

MissAdventure Mon 20-Apr-20 17:09:00

What do you call a man with a rabbit up his bum?

Warren.

Forestflame Mon 20-Apr-20 16:48:29

What do you call a man sitting in a cauldron?
Stew.
What do you call a man lying underneath a car?
Jack.

MissAdventure Mon 20-Apr-20 16:05:54

What do you call a fish with no eyes?

A fsh.

What do you call a fly with no wings?

A walk.

grannydarkhair Mon 20-Apr-20 15:41:48

What sits at the bottom of the sea and shakes?

A nervous wreck!

grannydarkhair Mon 20-Apr-20 15:40:15

My son's favourite joke pre-school (he's now 40). I lost count of how often I heard him tell this joke to anyone and everyone.

How do you make a sausage roll?

Push it down a steep hill!

chrissyh Mon 20-Apr-20 15:21:37

I stayed up all night trying to figure out where the sun was.

Then it dawned on me.

CariGransnet (GNHQ) Mon 20-Apr-20 15:06:04

Q - Why did Adele cross the road?

A - To sing Hello From The Other Side

cas58 Mon 20-Apr-20 14:56:37

Why did the chicken cross the road?
To get to the other side.

Why did the chewing gum cross the road?
Because it was stuck to the chicken's foot.

What do you call a girl between houses?
Alley

What do you call a girl in a frying pan?
Patty

lizzypopbottle Mon 20-Apr-20 14:30:42

My all time favourites:

Q. How do you tell the difference between a weasel and a stoat?

A. A weasel is weasily identified but a stoat is stoatally different.

Q. What do you call a deer with no eyes?

A. No idea!

Q. What do you call a man with no ears?

A. Anything you like! He can't hear you!

Pittcity Mon 20-Apr-20 14:12:30

How do you get down off an elephant?
You don't. You get down off a duck.

Pittcity Mon 20-Apr-20 14:10:35

How do you recognize an excellent farmer?
He's outstanding in his field.

grandtanteJE65 Mon 20-Apr-20 13:58:57

Q: Why did the traffic light turn red?

A: It was embarrassed about having to change in the middle of the road.

(I know it's a hoary chestnut. Here's another):

Q: When does a Scottish gentleman resemble a donkey?
A: When he stands on his banks and braes (brays)

Nortsat Mon 20-Apr-20 13:57:37

Q: Where does a dog go, when it loses its tail and needs to get another one?

A: A retail store.

??

moleswife Mon 20-Apr-20 13:30:00

How do you tell the difference between the head and tail of a worm?
Tickle it in the middle and see which end laughs!

CariGransnet (GNHQ) Mon 20-Apr-20 13:29:33

Q - Why did the tomato blush?
A - Because he saw the salad dressing

CariGransnet (GNHQ) Mon 20-Apr-20 13:28:37

Gwenisgreat1

Q- Why did the butterfly flutter by?
A - Because the woodpecker behind would peck her behind!±

This reminds me of a similar one I grew up with - why did the owl 'owl? Because she was afraid the woodpecker behind would peck her behind

Bathsheba Mon 20-Apr-20 13:23:18

Q. What happened when the wheel was invented?

A. It caused a revolution.

Maf1 this is thread for jokes. You might want to start your own thread to discuss the TV ads wink

Bathsheba Mon 20-Apr-20 13:17:02

Q. Why didn't the skeleton go to the dance?

A. He had no body to go with.

phoenix Mon 20-Apr-20 12:57:26

Q. Did you hear about the cowboy whose clothes were made of brown paper?

He was arrested for rustling.

phoenix Mon 20-Apr-20 12:55:41

Q. What do you call a woman who can juggle pints of ale?

A. Beatrix

Q. What do you call a woman who juggle pints of ale while playing snooker?

A. Beatrix Potter

Maf1 Mon 20-Apr-20 12:54:48

Is it just me or is the TV advertisement for patient claimline so very wrong at this time when the NHS is struggling for everything

moggie57 Mon 20-Apr-20 12:16:38

Q.
have you heard about the hyena that swallowed an oxo cube.A.made a laughing stock of himself....hahahahahaha....

GrannyMosh Mon 20-Apr-20 12:10:36

What do you call a man without a spade in his head?
Douglas!

GrannyMosh Mon 20-Apr-20 12:10:05

What do you call a man with a spade in his head?
Doug!

EllanVannin Mon 20-Apr-20 12:09:34

Where do bees go to the toilet ?
A BP station.