They usually are, aren't they? ?

My daughter in law once told me her son was attending judo classes to learn 'marital arts.

Don't take it to heart, phoenix. Emotions are running high at the moment.

Maybe we all need to take a deep breath.

You can never start too many threads phoenix

"Even in darkness it is possible to create light"

Hello all, due to a comment from another member on another thread, it would seem that I start rather too many threads, so as they say on Dragons Den, "I'm out".

Love and best wishes to you all.

Oh no, NotAGran55 not swede! Please tell me it wasn't mashed with added black pepper!

(Not really being facetious)

Age 11 and a new starter at secondary , my son came home from full of a story about a big boy who had got into trouble for having some drugs . He told us in a lowered voice that he wasn’t sure but he thought it was swede .

The innocence of village life and and a C of E primary school of 90 children .

MissAdventure how DO they make those striped curries?

A friend of mine was chatting to her friend about Indian food.

"Oh, I love a chicken Tigger" said the woman.

Loving some of these!

The friend who has been "furlonged" also bought 2 "pundits" of raspberries on special offer.

She also refers to a hotel she stayed in where the selection of "preservatives" on the breakfast buffet was "superlative"!

When I worked in a high street Opticians an elderly gentleman assured me that his wife had “ immaculate regeneration “ (Macular Degeneration).

I had a conversation with Mr P about cycling, he said "You'll never get me in those Lurex shorts"

I had an amusing moment imagining his manly thighs in glittery fabric!

My friend loves eating “advocados “

My dad once sent DH and me to buy him an oil can. Now we did wonder at what we thought he'd said and, in fact, had a laugh about how such a thing would work.

What was even more odd was that when we asked in the shop for a 'four-speed' oil can, the man didn't bat an eyelid and sold us what my dad actually wanted - a force-feed oil can. Maybe he mis-heard us but correctly, if you see what I mean.

When out for coffee..my sister always asks for a Campocino ...

One which my cousin often used was her son's new job meant he had to compute between home and our next town on a daily basis.

Cherry, yes that’s what I always thought but I keep hearing people say “back”, Cricket makes sense. I love derivations of phrases.

My Dad's favourite memory at a pipe band competition was hearing the announcement that the winning band was 'Shites and Dockhead' instead of Shotts and Dykehead. (Two places in Scotland). That band was known as that ever after in our house.

Ooh, courtesan treatment sounds quite saucy, Phoenix!

When younger I always thought the phrase was “state of the Ark”.

Yes, when I was first diagnosed with COPD, Mr P was telling people that I had OCD!

And I won't even begin to tell you what he told people when I tested positive for campylobacter!

I'll never be able to hold my head up in polite society again

Lucca , I think "off your own bat" is correct and derives from cricket.

A friend of my mother's used to say "ship shape and brushty fashion" and when she used to refer to a neighbour, who in her opinion was a "slut", she used to say she was "all caught and no knickers".

My neighbour has almost her own language.
She tells me her budgies always sit there "twitting" away, and her COPD gets called all sorts.

My mother always did a few things in a 'foul swoop' rather than a 'fell swoop' but since she was often talking about doing unpleasant things I think it appropriate and use it myself!

Suedonim I heard of a woman saying she felt much better now that she was on that courtesan treatment!

When I had a job in a chemist shop a woman came in and asked for ‘Some of that cyanide toothpaste for my husband.’ After I gawped at her I realised she wasn’t planning on murder, she just wanted Sensodyne.