Did your parents ever say they were proud of you

No, never. It was thought to encourage’big-headedness’ years ago and it does have an unfortunate effect on self esteem. My youngest sister was brought up much differently as she was the 4th, was spoilt and favoured and doesn’t remember having self esteem issues.

JackyB that's a great idea, I'm going to praise both mine today (without it looking too obvious). No time like the present!?

My mother didn’t believe in praising as far as I remember. She was apparently proud of me but would never have said so to my face as I might have become conceited in her view. She was pretty quick to point out my failings !! You can’t wear that your legs are too fat/ you have no common sense eycetc

MawB why is it a strange Question? As you can see by the answers not everyone was.

No never . I didn't live with my parents until I was five as my mother was ill.
They never liked me but my older sister as the golden child

Luckygirl ( and any others who had a similar upbringing)
You had a quite undemonstrative, even hard and unfeeling Mother, which was a great shame.
My comments were answering the OP ‘ did your parents ever say they were proud of you’.I wondered how anyone could remember their parents saying that, as most on here are in their 60’s and 70’s or even older.
If anyone had awful parents, hard, even cruel ones, then that’s a different matter entirely, but not what the OP asked.

I think my parents did not praise what I did well because my father had a sister who got the family's spare money to train her special talent (mezzo soprano) and she was spoiled and vain. My mother was reared in an orphanage and learned to be resilient and wanted me to be resilient.

Interesting, lemongrove, maybe I have a good memory but I can recall things a teacher or two said at Infants School, and the odd comment at church or in a shop when I was quite young. Maybe words touch some people more deeply than others. Sadly it is the more hurtful, disparaging comments I remember more than the uplifting ones. Maybe some brains are wired differently.

On my mum's deathbed, she'd told the nurses what a " great girl I was " ( I was 45 ) and that was the first time I was ever praised. Did I mind ? Not at all because at least I was beside her when she quietly and peacefully died.

Neither parents ever sang their praises, except perhaps for my brother who was more brainy than myself but I can't remember ever being bothered by it. I was the " duffer ", but sadly they were so wrong and it was too late to realise that for both of them.

I think most older people were raised at a time when, for fear of “spoiling” their children, parents were harsh and undemonstrative.
I never felt my parents loved me or were proud of me. My bedtime prayer said, “Make me a good girl” as though I’d been born bad.
When I passed the 11+ my father was hugely relieved that he wouldn’t have to pay for me to go to a private school.
Nothing I did was ever good enough for my mother, her criticism was almost as though she was jealous of my abilities.

No, I think it was a generational thing. I never get praised even now by my mother, I get a grudging thanks sometimes. In contrast I tell my family how clever, beautiful and wonderful they are, its just what we do a bit of praise never hurt anyone.

I also think it was a generational thing.
Certainly, I found,when I worked, that the "love you!"'love you too/more!" words spoken at the end of every conversation between my clients and their grandkids seemed,well, a bit mechanical? Sort of like a more wordy "bye" ?

No not as a child but in later life. There was lots of love, hugs and kisses in our home but can't remember being told they were proud of me. When Mr J and I married and bought a house they were immensely proud as we were the first in our family to do this. When I achieved professional qualifications and a career as an Adult they told me how well I had done. As they aged and Mr J and I cared for them they told us over and over again how much they appreciated what we were doing for them. It was a pleasure to care for them as they had cared for me as a Child and I would not have wanted it any other way.

Judy I loved your post and completely concur

Thank you Alishka for your kind words

Ellianne I sympathize. It was the same for me. I was publicly humiliated because I couldn't reach my mother's "high standards". She wore black to my wedding and rolled her eyes when I announced I was pregnant. Some mothers are best forgotten

Never. Very unhappy childhood; thank God my maternal Nanny loved me.

Never, nothing I did was ever good enough, if I came second in anything, why wasn't I first. Was scared stiff all my life then. Still no confidence, more than 50 years on.

No. My Father did say while sitting in my beautiful large detached mansion “ “ well Janeayresister “ you have done well, because I thought you were just going to be an unmarried Mother”
When I won a place at a very prestigious University he said “ You won’t get a grant and I won’t pay.
So you get the gist, regarding my childhood.

I can't actually remember them specifically saying they were proud of me on any particular occasion. But I always knew they loved me very much. I had wonderful loving parents and was very lucky.

Not once that I recall.

My dad said it to me on my second wedding day. I don’t ever remember my mum saying it.....

I think I was very lucky. Despite my family suffering financial hardship and some other real difficulties when I was growing up, I always felt extremely loved. I was given praise, encouragement and affection by my parents, grandparents and great grandparents.
I believe that the love I had and felt, really did give me the strength to deal with the problems I've dealt with in life.

hmm? don`t recall the words, but I knew my mum was "proud" of me..

My mother could never bring herself to say anything nice to me/ or about me /or 'well done' .
My father had never lived long enough to see me achieve what I did in my life and often wonder what he have thought/said.