Where is the lockdown community spirit

People can be thoughtless, but maybe everyone thinks someone else is helping her.

Did she see neighbours to speak to before the lockdown?

Nannan2
He loves cooking and feeding people. Before the lockdown hit we entertained a lot.
The 2 lovely ladies who he gives to have promised a meal out to anywhere of our choice, no expence spared ? Happy days to look forward to.

That made me laugh! Especially the way you put it, thank you. “Not seen hide or hair of the neighbour“. Being French I just love British expressions......

My husband is on the NHS Volunteer group but has not been asked to do anything! I’m on a more local group set up by the town council and I’ve completed two tasks so far.

Your SIL only has to contact her County Council who no doubt have a team of volunteers for just such tasks as shopping for food, delivering medication etc. I know this for a fact as I volunteer for Nottinghamshire County Council. It has to be accepted and acknowledged that people lead busy lives, have children and family responsibilities etc and cannot always be responsible for their neighbours. But by the same token, your SIL could have ASKED someone for help! Why are these issues always so one-sided?

People who arent shielding are on lockdown too and trying to keep their exposure to the bare minimum.

People commenting that they got a note at the beginning but nothing since: people are trying to stay in! The offer still stands. But its unreasonable to expect people to be going round peoples houses all the time double checking. Offering once is enough. Contact them if you need anything

Honestly I think some shielding people forget that everyone else is lockdowned too.

Im sure,as someone said,a lot of people are "sheilding" or sheilding someone in their home (for us its my youngest son, though we all in our house have medical problems) but I'm not willing to compromise his health at moment.so if we've to go out for anything (other son& I) we are straight there& back,with gloves on (& now masks too) & get changed & showered when we get home..im normally a helpful person but as others said,we dont know everyones circumstances do we?

I spelt 'shielding' wrong

I am helping some people and have offered to help others with shopping.

Lots of people who seem not to be offering help may have their own problems.

Yes the council organised people who rang me to ask if i needed their help,and i said apart from i was struggling at first to get a shopping delivery spot i was ok for now..i think they get numbers from database or DWP or something.?but im sure anyone missed out could ring council number & ask?

Sister in law is quite frail but does have a delivery and I pop round with a few essentials when she needs them. So she isnt desperate. But surely if you knew you had an elderly neighbour living on her own, you would knock and pass a few words with her and offer your phone number in an emergency I certainly would. She’s a friendly person and would really appreciate that.

The point is, where there is community spirit, everyone is helping each other.

If you're shielding and getting delivery slots check that the young zero hours neighbour out of work has enough food and offer to share etc.

If you're home and shielding check if the keyworker neighbours need some of your spare pillow cases to keep their work laundry separate. Or sew them a washable laundry bag.

If you want a community you need to be the community

The people bitter because theyre old and nobody young is running around after them are void of community spirit themselves and are reaping what they sew.

The young are struggling too. The old have no monopoly on needing assistance at this time. At least if youre retired your income is stable so you CAN buy food!. Schools are struggling to get enough food parcels around to struggling families.

Our elderly neighbour ordered our girls easter eggs as part of their shopping delivery as they knew that our business which is half our income is closed and they didnt like to think that the girls would miss out on easter as a result. Thats the community spirit people are talking about. A two way street. We look out for each other

My mother lives in flats in Surrey. 3 lots of neighbours left her notes offering help and one gets her a newspaper every day

My thoughts exactly ...I am jealous of those living in a friendly helpful community ….where I live I have seen no one, had no letters or leaflets, and no phone calls....I don't mind for myself but I do feel for one lady of 97 who staggers to the shop with her trolley ….she is not very steady on her feet and I worry she will fall. However, I have no car so can't offer shopping although I always ask her if I can get one or two items that I could carry ...but she is very independent and wants to do her own thing ! Sometimes I follow her at the required distance (can't even hold her arm to help her across the road because of social distancing) just to make sure she gets there and back safely ….I so WISH I lived somewhere friendly where neighbours talk to each other !

But surely if you knew you had an elderly neighbour living on her own, you would knock and pass a few words with her and offer your phone number in an emergency I certainly would.

people are not making social calls to protect themselves and others.

If you were a keyworker, working with confirmed Covid cases, would you go round your elderly neighbours to chat at their door?

Its a shame she has never exchanged numbers with neighbours before

But if they see deliveries and you arriving then they know she is looked after.

Maybe they are busy volunteering with people who dont have family like you popping round.

Im sorry if she would like social calls but that is not supposed to be what is on offer at the moment.

She has everything she needs and you are complaining that she doesnt get to chat to people? well nobody does right now!

What I found heartening about I village that it is younger people who have stepped up. We older people are the group who volunteers or gets asked to help regularly in the normal run of events, but we had been worried that there was noone ready to take over when we can no longer do it.

We needn't have worried.

Absolutely right Kitty! In our village for years the over 60s (mostly over 70s) have organised all social
Events & have Complained that the younger ones dont help (or even join in often). Now however the young ones in the village are running around like headless chickens doing shopping and collecting prescriptions for the more elderly ir vulnerable residents. Its been amazing. Now they are talking of a post lockdown party for the whole village (in the distant future!)

Lots of help being offered in my village.... I’m getting food for 2 neighbours and I’ve been asked by young couple if I need any help. So it’s all good here. FIL lives in East Rainton and lots of offers of help there to.

We have a lovely fb community support group where we live, they pick up & deliver our scripts for us each week (I'm shielded & dh is self isolating) My next door neighbour however thinks she is a law unto herself. She has friends over on a weekend evening & they sit out in the garden chatting & she has had her daughter & young dgc over to play. She then has the audacity to stand on her doorstep every Thursday evening & clap for keyworkers. Really p***es me off ?

notanan2
quote' you keep yourself to yourself people take the hint' When I ask did we in the UK ,and the rest of the world, experience a crisis the likes of which we are experiencing 24x7 year 2020. Is it too much to ask that we pick up the phone/ put a message through someone's door, who we know or THINK we know likes to be independent' and say give me a ring if I can do anything for you? doesn't hurt does it.?

Sarah people who sit by their phones seething that it isnt ringing are rarely worth ringing.

If you arent reaching out to others in your community dont complain that they arent reaching out to you.

The OP is assuming that none of tge SILs neighbours are needy just because theyre younger.

The SIL hasnt reached out to check on them either..

Our little close is very good, letters pushed through the door and neighbourhood WhatsApp group. If we want anything we just have to ask, not that we do but it’s still a lovely gesture.

I have had a couple of phone calls from the ‘volunteers’ who joined up to help. Very pleasant people who wanted to know if I needed anything and left a number to call if my needs changed.
I think it depends where you live and how well they are being coordinated in your area.

I used to help out with our neighbourhood group and I saw that it was the same people all the time doing and organizing everything. It is all very well some people saying the road runs both ways implying that those who dont get help dont deserve it because they dont give it but that is wrong. There comes a time when we need more help than we can give. Some people are givers and some people are takers. Now I just make sure I keep clear of takers.