My DDs' fb friends

A lot of my cousins live in Canada and Australia so Facebook is a good way to connect. Recently I’ve had friend requests from people I was at school with. These are people I never really mixed with so I think they’re just ‘collecting friends’
Can’t see the point myself.

Meant to be look

I sometimes lol at what my sons friends are posting but purely because I.like to see their beautiful children and our sons don't keep in touch with them a lot. I had a lot to do with them when they were younger. I don't send friend requests but if they do I accept. Initially my sons weren't happy about it but they have got over it. One of my sons has left Facebook anyway.

I dont worry about things my children post on fb! They would sgarevanything i might worry about with me and dh, not fb.

I find fb a good way of keeping up to date with them along with phone calls, video calls, WhatsApp and Insragram.

Stopped Facebook nearly 5 years ago. The best decision. Not missed it one bit don't want to know what my children post or snoop on them not worth the worry.

I am friends with now grownup friends of my children...not many but they sent me friend requests. I have tracked down friends I lost touch with because of house moves etc...two in Australia. I have also found cousins Facebook gets a lot of bad press but it does have its good side.

Oh god no !
I just don’t want to know what my daughters do on fb. I just know it would upset me to find they waste time following the Kardashians or whoever.
I’m only on there to link games etc . I always decline “friends” being an antisocial so and so I guess.

I have got a handful of Facebook Friends who are also friends, or ex boyfrends of my daughters. The latter because I became friends with their parents many years ago, buttheir parents do not have Facebook pages of their own, so its a way of keeping up with their family news. My Daughters are fine about it, my eldest one still chats to her ex from her teenage years, even though they are now both married with families of their own.
I also belong to a group from my old school, again photos and news is shared, and occasionaly some of them meet up for a night out. I once did this, but never again, People can change so much over the years, and the nice guy from the Youth club when you were 16, can be the Preditor from hell who thinks hes 'Gods gift to all women ' at 40!

I used to teach teenagers and made it a rule that I would never accept friend requests from anyone under 18, as I didn't want them knowing too much about my private life or for my motives to be called into question. It also avoided that 'Why him/her, not me?' issue if I didn't want to accept anyone that I taught or was in my tutor group. I did accept a few when they were older, just to find out how they were doing, but not for long. It's a decision I still stick to now, even though I'm retired.

I have one of my DD's friends as my friend on FB, because she sent me a request. I find her posts mildly irritating.

Worse still, I have lots of my in-laws as friends. Couldn't avoid it and so I have much more contact with them than I ever wanted. I know, I am a terrible person.

I do exactly the same. Then it’s up to them.

Kittylester I am exactly the same as you. I am "friends" with some of my children's friends, but only if they ask me. I would never ask them first. I find that less of my "see every day" friends use it now. My children tend to use Instagram more. My DD1 has come off it altogether for personal reasons. I love Facebook more for the groups. There are lots of groups for where I live and several brilliant local history groups. I also follow groups for some of my favourite TV shows and the slimming group that I belong to. What I don't like are Facebook stalkers; Facebook friends who read everything I post but never ever comment ot put anything up themselves. My very best friend, who lives quite a distance away, does that. I know she loves seeing what we as a family post and what we are up to, but I wish she would sometimes just say something back. Even if it was just a "like".

I tend to accept or send friends requests to family, close personal acquaintances, their families/close friends and sometimes people from groups I belong to. There is only one I'm tempted to block - a reactionary Trump supporter - the sister of my Brazilian adopted sister's best friend, who came to London with my sister in the early seventies. I'm sure this one girl is a lovely person, but she took umbrage when I shared an anti-Trump joke with my FB friends.

Craicon you just need to go to the Privacy settings and sort it out. It's fine - it can be as private as you want it to be.
The only thing I really object to is when people who I know as being only moderately right-wing, indiscriminately post something from a far right group which is usually a) not true and b) from a group that is blatantly racist. They need to check first and just NOT do it. (I've unfriended a few who have turned out to be genuinely ultra-right - don't need those in my life!). but pics of kittens, especially in times of stress, are fine.

NotSpaghetti - it is perfectly possible to be on Facebook and not pry! Why would anyone do that? I've been on it for years and it's great to see family fun things that they're all doing. I wouldn't send a friend request to my children's friends but I've accepted several from them, which is always rather sweet, I think. I am also friends on there with my grandson (the girls are all a bit young) but I don't snoop about on his page - he is only 20 so I imagine he uses Insta far more anyway. But now and then I get the odd message from him. It's fine - it's what you make it. I hate to see people sneering about it, as far too many seem to do.

I am friends with all of my children on FB except for one. She was one of my friends but every time she threw her toys out of her pram because somebody upset her, she unfriended me which was a bit hurtful. Eventually, I suggested that she might want to keep her privacy by not adding me again which she agreed to telling me that she didn't really want any family as her friends. Now if she wants me to see any photos of the kids, she either sends them to me directly or puts them on her husband's page and tags me. FB can be a minefield!

No you don’t have to use your real name. I’m sure there isn’t anyone really called Anita Go, or Eesa Fiend. I know some other pseudonyms who I do know by their real name but don’t want to raise interest in them.
You have to tell folk you want to be friends with e.g. family so they can accept your friend request.
You do need it if you want people to contact you because they remember you. They aren’t going to remember living next door to Wendy Roofblewoff.

As one who has never had a Facebook account, could you tell me.
If I join Facebook I gather I would have to use my real name. If I didn’t want anyone to know I had a Facebook account at all, can you do that?
Also I notice that when the software on my iPad is updated it often overrides previous setting s in some way and you have to go back and change some privacy settings again. Does this happen with Facebook.

Swore I would never go on FB. Then the virus happened & my son set it up for me. I have friends who are real friends & am very careful who I accept as friends. I keep up with more news on FB now than by watching tv with nothing but the virus 24/7. Like animal posts & music but am very wary too.

Craicon That is not strictly true. You can adjust your settings so that friends of friends cannot see photos or posts you put up.
FB security can be complicated but I am constantly checking my settings.

Also if a friend likes a post of mine it does not mean their friends can read it or view it if you have your security set correctly.

Facebook isn’t as private as some of you seem to think!

For instance, if you post a picture and someone in your friends list such as your DS or DD ‘likes’ or comments on it, then ANYONE in their friends list can see that picture too.

Not only that, the ‘friend’ can then take a screenshot of your picture or post, save it to their own device and distribute it themselves.
Then their friends can see it too.
Users in the 20-40 age bracket often have hundreds of ‘friends’ on their account, many that they don’t know personally but got added for various reasons. They have no idea who these people are in real life.

So your funny post about falling over in the garden can be shared to the world at large very easily. It can also be digitally altered before being shared.

What saddens me particularly is pictures of babies and young children being used by others for likes or to gain sympathy and attention and to get people donating to fake causes.

I have some older ladies on my friends group who never learn. They happily re-post all sorts of rubbish without ever checking whether it’s genuine.

You get lost dogs posts where if you search back, you discover that it was reunited with its owner 3 years ago but the original post is still doing the rounds and the ‘friend’ who shared it is completely oblivious.

Recently, there was a photo of a baby hooked up to monitors in a hospital and a plea for donations for medical treatment in the US. When I looked into it further and did a ‘reverse image’ search, the picture had been taken from a news website where a baby had been treated following a car accident and had been discharged from hospital. Some dodgy person was using her image to con people into donating money for bogus treatment. You can obviously report that instance, but many more will go unreported.

I have a Facebook account but I never post pictures of my family, especially DGC on there.

I am on facebook but have the settings to 'just me'. No friends. I have sites I go to which are various, such as radio shows, bbc news ect ect
I used to accept friends but deleted that account when I found they could then look at accounts of all my friends as I could with their friends...I found that shocking so closed account

I am very careful with Friends requests on FB. Once you are listed as a Friend you then get broadcast to their friends and their friends - the net is spread too wide, and too many people get to know things you’d rather they didn’t. I prefer ‘real’ friends for a telephone chat.

My daughter won't be friends with me on Facebook ? I am however fb friends with a couple of her friends and she with a couple of mine.
However like you I wouldn't send the friends request

Ditto Kittylester. I’m exactly like that! However, got a couple of my sons ex girlfriends on there from some years ago who haven’t deleted me!! ( and I want them too!) I don’t want to delete them, it looks so rude, don’t want to offend them! Two others are their old school friends, who even call in to show me new babies etc. My sons all love that their old friends like me! Sharing moments of love, it makes the world go round ???