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Stop trying to change things you can't. Peace of Mind

(58 Posts)
Notright Wed 03-Jun-20 11:29:20

I have a brief look at the forums most mornings and to be honest I'm stopping. Why? Doesn't anyone have anything better to say than moan, moan, moan.
Has no-one got anything positive, happy or cheerful going on in their lives. There must be something funny next doors children did, rather than something naughty they did. Or what reading has cheered you up lately; or what book do you recommend to take the reader away from all this.
Please, feeling sorry for yourself only leads to misery. Spoil yourself - watch TV all day instead of worrying about cleaning the bathroom, accompanied by a couple of glasses of wine. Play cards with your husband or partner. If you've got older grandchildren get them to organise a weekly meet-up with the family on Zoom. I promise you that is fun. Look out of the window on our sunny days at the beautiful blue blue sky that will once again disappear once planes start flying and cars fill the road. Listen to the birds.
We can't change things so enjoy what you can do please. Keep Safe everyone.

Rufus2 Thu 04-Jun-20 14:11:20

Good Morning thread is anything but negative
Well, dragonfly, you could have fooled me! wink
It's anything but healthy, although given the perfectly understandable age-related medical ailments amongst us, of which I have my share., it acts as a useful substitute for a visit to the Doc. and poses no risk of cross-contaminaion! grin

gnhq should have a word
Lucca Why? It's nothing to do with them and in any case, what word would you suggest?
Given the reception "Notright" has received I wouldn't blame her/him not hanging around! sad
OoRoo

Lucca Thu 04-Jun-20 09:04:39

Did notright just lob that in and not return ?
Well here is a full on moan from me, people,who start a thread and never come back ...gnhq should have a word !

Daisymae Wed 03-Jun-20 16:29:01

I hear Stepford was a rather nice place for people to live. Nothing to worry our little heads about there!

Ilovecheese Wed 03-Jun-20 16:19:29

yes, well said bluebirdwsm

sodapop Wed 03-Jun-20 15:59:57

Well said bluebirdwsm

bluebirdwsm Wed 03-Jun-20 14:16:34

You are on a forum where there are a proportion of elderly, maybe lonely, disabled in any way, bereaved or estranged from family members, who have lost friends, have mobility issues and are in lockdown due to a pandemic.

Which also means a great deal more distance from and little real contact with family and friends and practical problems. With maybe no one to communicate honestly with, I think they have every right to get support, find feedback and to be able to vent frustrations online.

To dictate otherwise is to control and police how people think and what is posted on here. How patronising and superior it comes over, even if the intention is good. We are all capable and indeed I'm certain most people do constantly appreciate the beauty of nature, animals, wonderful friends, sons, daughters, grandchildren, sunshine, blue sky, art etc. etc. etc...each and every day. As have I throughout my life, whether with or without problems at the time. How can you assume people don't?

Most people know how to treat themselves albeit not in the ways you mention, we all know life is much, much richer and diverse than that. I don't think they need someone to tell them to turn the tv on, look out of their windows or zoom. So just open the positive threads and let others discuss their fears or worries [no matter what they are] and find reassurance and connect with others without judgment.

Kate1949 Wed 03-Jun-20 13:56:49

Treasure it Pinkcakes smile

PinkCakes Wed 03-Jun-20 13:55:45

Kate1949 Bless you, I'm sorry to hear that. Mine is a state - but so what?

Kate1949 Wed 03-Jun-20 13:54:04

Oh how I agree "Pinkcakes*. Hair and nails. As an alopecia sufferer who can't get my hair system maintained in lockdown, oh to have some hair to moan about.

PinkCakes Wed 03-Jun-20 13:50:10

I think a lot of us moan about the weather - it's too hot/wet/cold/windy - it's a British thing, I think. I'm fed up of hearing some women telling me how they're desperate to have their hair/nails done.

I'm fortunate to not have any ailments, I'm lucky to have a close family and no real problems, I know, but there are enough miserable things going on in the world without moaning about trivial things.

MissAdventure Wed 03-Jun-20 13:49:42

That's just as annoying as someone who wants to wax lyrical about birdsong and nature, as if nobody else ever noticed. grin

travelsafar Wed 03-Jun-20 13:46:58

I live with someone who moans about everything!!! When i say stop it, he says i am not moaning just saying. I have told him to change the tone of his voice then as it sounds like moaning to me. Some people just have that about them. No matter what they say it comes out wrong, moreso
if everything they say has a negative content!!!

MissAdventure Wed 03-Jun-20 13:42:02

There's a lot to be said for having a good moan.

Anniebach Wed 03-Jun-20 13:41:31

Watching tv all day would bring on depression

ginny Wed 03-Jun-20 13:34:16

OP moaning about people moaning.

Furret Wed 03-Jun-20 13:04:04

Bossy or what? Cheer up chaps. Hands to the deck. We’re all in this together. The f**k we are - that’s Boris-talk.

SynchroSwimmer Wed 03-Jun-20 13:03:23

Thank you, yes.

Having thought how brilliant that the Queen is riding a horse at that wonderful age, and how lovely life is and then seeing it on another thread (and then seeing the negative comment about “class” - just felt the joy and lifeblood seeping out of me)

Currently listening to blackbirds, robins, swallows and mistle thrushes all singing so joyfully on my roof and I have to keep going out just to gaze in wonder at them all.

BlueBelle Wed 03-Jun-20 12:57:26

sodapop I too found notright s post a bit condescending You really can’t tell people how to feel or act, only tell yourself, your post is the equivalent of telling an unhappy person to buck themselves up I m sure we all look at the world though a true myriad of feelings
There have been many many positive and sometimes funny posts and threads on here so may I politely suggest you pick out the positive post to read and keep away from any sad ones
Not everyone can feel like Pollyanna all the time

Lucca Wed 03-Jun-20 12:52:42

That’s awful for you Anniebach and annoying to have people telling you to count your blessings be happy blah blah. Soda pop with you all the way, no need to be patronised!
I also disagree entirely with OP saying it’s all negative on GN I think there is a wide range of threads, posts , opinions and personalities.

Anniebach Wed 03-Jun-20 12:45:11

I am happy I have to sleep on a sofa because I can’t physically
change my bed linen, happy because i don’t have a husband or
partner, happy because there are no children living next door
or even 10 doors away, happy because the physiotherapist can’t visit me with aids for my arthritis, happy because my carpets haven’t been vacuumed for 12 weeks.

MissAdventure Wed 03-Jun-20 12:40:08

I'm suspicious of relentlessly cheerful people.

Galaxy Wed 03-Jun-20 12:26:28

Also nobody feels happy all the time, if they say they do they are lying. Being happy, being angry, being sad, being scared are all normal human emotions, there is nothing wrong with those emotions.

sodapop Wed 03-Jun-20 12:18:04

Sorry posted too soon. I really don't need to be patronised thank you.

sodapop Wed 03-Jun-20 12:16:43

Don't tell me how to feel Notright if I want to be miserable and moany I will.

dragonfly46 Wed 03-Jun-20 12:13:41

You are wrong Rufus the Good Morning thread is anything but negative. Obviously some people have problems and air them but that is not the rule.

And yes Notright why two threads? Even your name is negative!