Don't raise a snowflake....

Thank you to all who posted.

Daisydoes your post rather sums it up! She can't cope with taking the car for an MOT!

If her father did all of that for her, he sort of failed as a parent.

Some seem to have understood the point I was trying to make, some didnt, some took exception to the use of the word "snowflake" some didnt.

shrug emoticon! (You'll have to imagine it, there, isn't one)

I have always thought of a snowflake as someone who melts when there is a little bit of heat.
The car breaks down. I would call the RAC, put on my coat and wait at the side of the road for them to arrive.
My DiL would panic, ring DS in tears so that he would take care of everything for her, from phoning the RAC, to driving to her to comfort her.
She can't cope with taking her car into the garage for its MOT. So he takes the day off work to do it for her.

Her father did all of these things for her, so she never learned to stand on her own two feet. She is incapable

I love her to bits, but by God, she can be hard work.

That's my understanding of the word too GillT57. These sorts of words are a lazy attempt to ward off sensible discussion by impugning a person's character and moral fibre.

An interesting thread as it has shown our different views of the meaning of the word 'snowflake', The kind of person you are describing Phoenix, I would describe as spoilt, indulged, a prince or princess who expects, demands and gets what they want. Snowflake, on the other hand, I find is used as a derogatory term to dismiss anyone who doesn't agree with another's views, and is often used by older people to condemn what they see as over liberal opinions on subjects as varied as racism, sexism, child discipline, health and safety etc., etc. I find the use of the term generally offensive, not for the word, but for what it means, and it is on a par with the term 'boomer' which is sneeringly used to dismiss the opinions of anyone perceived to be over 50. It is a sad appropriation of a lovely word.

A 'snowflake' crumbles when faced with a difficult situation and 'flakes' when subjected to even the slightest criticism.

annsixty that is exactly what I think the definition of a snowflake is.

I have always thought of a snowflake as someone who has been protected and cannot deal with anything awkward or needing a bit of strength of character.
At the first sign of a problem they just melt away, not being able to deal with it.

vegansrock To become significant world leaders, they have developed to icicles with sharpened points instead of into snowflakes.

I find that a strange definition of snowflake Phoenix I have not heard that before. I took it to mean some one who could not stand up for themselves. Sensitive souls.

Ladymuck And do those who can't deal with the unpleasant things of life ever consider the fact that those who do deal with them on their behalf have to brace themselves to do it too?

It has nothing to do with thinking the world revolves around them. A snowflake/wimp is someone who cannot deal with the unpleasant things in life.

There are plenty of people who think the world revolves around them and as a consequence are intolerant bullies. Some significant political leaders spring to mind. I think there is a mismatch in the meaning of the term snowflake.

Why not call them selfish or over indulged then why follow the trend and use a beautiful word for a negative trait
But
This word is not used just to describe an over indulged child or young person It may have started off as that but it is used indiscriminately about any one who doesn’t agree with bullying and other nastiness
There’s one particular presenter on the radio will say awful things about certain celebrities (ones he doesn’t like) then if anyone rings in or texts in to defend them he calls them snowflakes
It’s like a cheese grater on my ears

Hetty58

To try to answer some of you questions, I brought it up (your phrase) after reading a couple of threads where in my opinion the child was being over pandered to. On the thread in question I stated that my stance might not be approved of, although actually some agreed with it.

No, of course I don't think increased supervision, childcare and organised activities have a detrimental influence!

These things are essential, providing of course they are given by the right people (think of those dreadful cases of child abuse within a nursery).

I am all for sensitivity, awareness of others difficulties and situations.

What I meant by "snowflake" (as I hoped I had explained earlier) was those who only care about themselves, and expect to have everything their own way.

I do think there are many snowflakes, some years ago my son set off from home to go to work in snow, he had to abandon his car, put his wellies on and walked the remaining 2 miles.
He lived the farthest away but was the one of the few to have made the effort.
Most of his colleagues didn’t even try.

phoenix, I really don't like the word 'snowflake' used as an insult. I would be very interested in knowing why you brought this up, though.

Do you think there are more spoilt, indulged, pampered kids around now? (There were plenty about when I was young.) Do you have good examples of raising kids with capable, independent, robust characters? Do you think that increased supervision, childcare and organised activities have a detrimental influence?

But it’s not just used to young people I ve been called a snowflake because I didn’t advocate spanking kids

You haven’t offended Phoenix but I m tired of hearing the word I think it is insulting and meant to be
if someone disagrees with me let’s converse about our different viewPoints not resort to name calling to insult
It’s a lazy way to debate and a total put down

We were raised with the attitude..... Take it or leave it !! if you don't like it, lump it !!

That soon knocks the snowflake out of you ?

As I mentioned I think it's used to divide generations.

Sorry if my OP has caused offence, it definitely wasn't meant to.

Yes, the term used up thread of "helicopter parenting" can apply, but I think there are some teens and twenties that also seem to think that they are very " entitled".

As a very daft example, there was a clip on either Facebook or YouTube regarding an American girl called (I think) MacKenzie, who was given a car for her birthday, and went into a complete meltdown because it was the wrong colour!

The term is insulting and it is meant to be insulting.

I'm not sure there are many people who think the world revolves round them. Possibly some older people are that way - they can be very self absorbed, narrow minded and quite scathing in their opinions of the young.

In my younger days some people were described as Flaky meaning they would crumble under any pressure.

I think the term has various meanings. Originally coined to mean what Phoenix says but nowadays often used as I say by Trump supporters et al to refer to liberals etc.

I think the origin of snowflake was just ‘flake’ - an American term for someone eccentric. Not sure if it was derogatory or actually a bit affectionate? Personally I’ve not heard anyone caring or compassionate called a snowflake but agree that some adults capable of thinking and acting for themselves but choosing not too may warrant that term - maybe old fashioned irresponsible would be better?

Me too BlueSky.