Embarrassing noisy neighbours

There was a similar problem in the Guardian a few months back. Most of the responses were similar to these, but there were several along the lines of... you're only jealous because you're not getting any, get over your self, you need counselling as it's perfectly natural etc. I was staggered! Mind you, that's the Graun for you...

I would find it amusing Not as young as they were? might be having problems? .

Next time you see them say "gosh, it sounded like you were having a great time on Wednesday at about 4.00pm - and smile. Maybe that will embarrass them?

Perhaps staying away from the bottom of your garden would save your blushes.?

It's a difficult one. Maybe post a brochure about soundproofing through their letter box and a note saying: Please can you keep the noise down, it's getting a bit embarrassing and my grandchildren might hear you. Thanks!

Grandmabatty has the best idea ! Go to the nearest point to them in your garden and say that out loud .... the couple will be so embarrassed and close their windows !

Sounds like a bit of jealousy maybe ?

Get your own recording of pigs grunting .like old macdonald and put it on full blast .get the gc to dance to it too.if it gets really bad .you could scream shut up

I rendition of “J’taime” played loudly at bottom of your garden ? Personally I’d find it amusing...might be a bit envious ?

I and my parter both suffer a lot of arthritis pain, almost every activity is accompanied by ‘effort grunts’
Might there be room for misinterpretation?

Just stop listening...get on with your life

everyone, at least another 3 houses can hear them.

Crikey! That's impressive!

From the bottom of your garden shout what's that noise , is someone having breathing problems ? When they hear you they will know you can hear them.. Although some people don't care.

Yes, round of applause or loud sports commentary, "And they're in the home straight now. Nearly at the finish line - but will it be a photo-finish?" Or play loud music: The Ride of the Valkyrie comes to mind. I'm serious.

It seems to be a thing now. My son had to shut his windows when revising for exams a few years ago as our neighbours are so noisy. Just walking the dog and heard some tell tale sounds while wandering up a random street towards the park.

I do find it odd I must admit!

We had this with our neighbours, we sat in bed and gave them a round of applause, didn't hear it again.

Play the William Tel overture loudly. On the other hand that might encourage them!

This happened to us a few years ago. Young couple next door going at it hammer and tongs with all the windows open. We waited until they finished and gave a round of applause. They closed their window

Or send them a catalogue for soundproofing wall foam? X

Ask your husband loudly if he can hear a pig?x

I’d have to ask for a few tips.......

Grandma24 ... I apologise for finding g the situation funny, all the witty replies but it's like someone else slipping on a banana skin, it is actually humorous!!

I can see how distressing g it is for you though.
Maybe one of your neighbor's who can also hear it will do as MissA suggested and post anonymously!

I think having a Chinese might mean so.ething different in our house from now on ??

Grandma24 seriously you have two options: 1) you wear earplugs when outdoors, and keep spare ones for visitors, or 2) go and knock on their door (let them finish first) and ask them to please keep the noise down. Of course you could have a nasty response to option 2.

So funny!

If you can hear them, then maybe they could hear you.. So when it starts say loudly, "what is that grunting noise?" " where is it coming from?" "can you hear it too darling?" etc etc. They maybe as you say, don't realise they can be overhead.