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Let's blame Boris

(87 Posts)
Newatthis Thu 13-Aug-20 12:18:50

With highs of 33° expected AGAIN today, it's time to ask "could the government have done more?" Downing Street knew about this heatwave weeks ago and have done nothing. Shipments of 400,000 pairs of Speedos and 500,000 bikinis, sun cream and Cornettos have reportedly been sent back as unsafe after media claims the shipment was quarantined a month ago and Boris did nothing.

Karen from Chavington said, "We just don't know if it's safe to go outside and sunbathe because we can't function or think for ourselves. Boris hasn't told us either way and all my obese kids need ice cream and sweets, the Hubby can't get out to rob anyone so we're out of lager and weed, I blame the government entirely"

Meanwhile, anti- heat protesters dressed in thick jumpers chanting "cold lives matter" have marched on London, Big Ben has been removed and a giant Mint Feast put in its place by protesters.

The BBC reported earlier, 'clearly the sun has come out and Downing street have done nothing to prevent it.'

A second heat Wave is expected to hit the UK in 4 weeks time

Jabberwok Thu 13-Aug-20 16:33:47

Strange that people on here seem to love really cruel demeaning satire aimed at people they despise and disapprove of! Mrs Thatcher, John Major,Boris (of course!) and most right wing politicians ,but become all sanctimonious and disapproving at a bit of leg pulling?!! I loved 'cold lives matter! The whole OP made me laugh ??! Cruel satire does not!

Orangerose Thu 13-Aug-20 16:35:14

Elegran

^". . it could be done so much better."^ Are you really applying literary criticism to a joke?

Haha yes, I actually think she is!

sf101 Thu 13-Aug-20 16:38:50

Made me chuckle - sounds like the news every night - now why didn't the government send me a text to remind me I had something in the oven grin grin grin

JenniferEccles Thu 13-Aug-20 16:40:26

You have summed up well Elegran when you talked of pompous hot air spouted by the permanently offended!!

trisher Thu 13-Aug-20 16:44:14

Elegran if someone wants to make a joke about something they should at least take the trouble to discover the realities of the character they want to create. Parodies need to stay close to the reality. It's just laziness to use the wrong language. And yes if someone had created a "Lavinia" character and had her saying things like "Cor blimey" or referring to her "bloke" it would be just as bad.
I don't find it offensive, just lazy and badly written. Jokes don't need to be written in standard English but they do need to be able to create and maintain character, other wise why bother?

Jane10 Thu 13-Aug-20 16:45:21

Oh well give us one of your perfectly formulated yet hilarious jokes then Trisher.

quizqueen Thu 13-Aug-20 16:47:29

Newatthis, take no notice of those who have had their sense of humour removed as long as the Tories are in power. I agree with your 'sarcasm', people blame the government for everything and think they have have to take no responsibility for anything which affects them nowadays.

Firecracker123 Thu 13-Aug-20 16:50:10

16:44trisher

Elegran if someone wants to make a joke about something they should at least take the trouble to discover the realities of the character they want to create. Parodies need to stay close to the reality. It's just laziness to use the wrong language. And yes if someone had created a "Lavinia" character and had her saying things like "Cor blimey" or referring to her "bloke" it would be just as bad.
I don't find it offensive, just lazy and badly written. Jokes don't need to be written in standard English but they do need to be able to create and maintain character, other wise why bother?

Perhaps trisher Newhatthis actually has a life lol

Ramblingrose22 Thu 13-Aug-20 16:51:26

I thought the post was funny and I welcome it this afternoon as everything is going wrong and I was very stressed until I read this.

Thank you Newatthis. Don't be put off Gransnet if a few people don't share your sense of humour.

Poppyred Thu 13-Aug-20 16:52:35

Hilarious. ... ??

Oopsminty Thu 13-Aug-20 16:53:36

Ramblingrose22

I thought the post was funny and I welcome it this afternoon as everything is going wrong and I was very stressed until I read this.

Thank you Newatthis. Don't be put off Gransnet if a few people don't share your sense of humour.

Good point, Ramblingrose22

A spot of light hearted nonsense is always welcome in my world

JenniferEccles Thu 13-Aug-20 17:02:32

Thankfully those of us who have entered into the spirit of this humorous lightheartedness, vastly outnumber, well, the others!

Newatthis Thu 13-Aug-20 17:32:28

p.s. I didn't write it - just copied and pasted it, it was sent to me on What's App. - so no apologies for it being badly written as far the use of English is concerned. Thank you to everyone who shares my sense of humour, I am pleased I have scattered a little happiness.

TheFrugalPiggy Thu 13-Aug-20 17:55:27

Well said Elegran. I am feeling genuinely sorry for OP. I do hope she won't be put off.

NfkDumpling Thu 13-Aug-20 18:39:58

I found it really funny and a bit of light relief. I nearly didn't look at it as I thought it was going to be another Bash Boris rant. And it is - except its the Bash Boris brigade who're being mocked! Wonderful!

Lucca Thu 13-Aug-20 18:46:26

“ So you don't find it funny? OK, don't laugh - no-one is holding a gun to your head and threatening to shoot you. ”

Am I not allowed to say I didn’t find it funny ?

Curlywhirly Thu 13-Aug-20 19:01:00

Well, I thought it was just a bit of fun, certainly not worth getting upset about.

Evoha16 Thu 13-Aug-20 19:08:25

Obviously not Lucca ? - I agree with you - how odd it is though that the OP thinks she’s ‘scattered a little happiness’ some people are easily amused ?

Mapleleaf Thu 13-Aug-20 19:28:03

Well, it brought a smile to my face, anyway, so thank you, Newatthis
The thing with humour is that it is as varied as the reader/listener. What one person finds amusing, another doesn't necessarily. Where one sees insult, another doesn't. That's humanity for you.
Indeed, some people are easily amused, Evoha16. Conversely, some are easily insulted.

Doodledog Thu 13-Aug-20 19:28:10

Why is it that when some people find something funny and others don't, those who don't are accused of having no sense of humour, and told to 'get a life' (whatever that means)?

It's fine to find something funny, and it's just as fine not to. A cut and pasted, badly written 'satire' that lampoons the working class and middle aged women doesn't make me laugh, but that doesn't mean that I am humourless - or dead, for that matter. It's a matter of personal taste, so I don't see the need for personal digs.

Goodbyetoallthat Thu 13-Aug-20 19:31:02

The very mention of "hubby & Karen" has me rolling in the aisles Not!
However each to their own.
This has been doing the rounds on social media for a while now so is getting a bit old.

Starblaze Thu 13-Aug-20 19:33:14

This isn't satire, it is bitter, angry and attacking.

Good jokes are for laughing with people to bring us together, even if that means laughing at ourselves.

Bad jokes are the ones that leave people a bit.... Ok bye

Jane10 Thu 13-Aug-20 19:50:12

Satire is meant to be biting!

Goodbyetoallthat Thu 13-Aug-20 19:54:17

Not sure in what way this is "biting" more like puerile to me but as has been said each to their own.

Elegran Thu 13-Aug-20 20:06:15

Not all people like"Karen" are working-class or middle-aged, a lot of them are young and would consider themselves a bit above working-class (and a lot of humour- and a lot of stuff posted on Gransnet - is badly written)